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« on: 29 Sep 2008, 01:06 »
Warning Forever
Dan stood outside the gate. He'd been standing there for quite some time and he'd resigned to the idea of standing there for quite some time. He'd forgotten why he'd stood there, but then he remembered and he laughed out loud. There was a time when it would've made him frustrated and angry but now it was amusing. He gazed back at the mansion with a facial expression not unlike Barbara Bush's, whenever she makes any facial expression, ever.
He remembered that day- the day he entered the mansion- and smiled. Just imagine where he'd be without it! In a desk job, probably. Working for the MAN. Actually, dead, probably. Dead would make more sense. But still! Look at where he ended up! This was much better than anywhere else he could've ended up. No responsibilities, no cares.. Well, one responsibility.
A boy passed by, walking down the street. Dan cleared his voice. "Hey, you!" warned Dan. "You better not be thinking of heading for this here MANSION!" Dan gestured towards the mansion with his fingers, which he often used for gesturing to the mansion. The boy continued walking, now with a confused expression. "There's an EVIL WIZARD who lives in this mansion!" yelled Dan. "And if you bother him, he CURSES YOU!"
The boy used his entire surplus of cognitive strength to ignore the strange man. Dan grinned as the boy disappeared on the horizon. He'd been warned, there was no chance of THAT boy coming to THIS mansion! Dan folded his arms across his strapping young body, and also groped his strapping young groin. He had a definite boner for warning.
There was a time when he hated the whole idea of warning. But that time had passed and as the years went by he came to take his warning duty as a gift rather than what it was. He put more gusto into it. He would alternate between days; Mondays were gloomy warnings, Tuesdays were threatening warnings, Wednesdays were cheerful warnings, etc. He had to come up with a way to make it interesting.
The problem was, he could only warn. In the beginning he'd come out of the mansion and stood by the gate and his girlfriend couldn't carry on a conversation with him. She'd ask him how it was, if there was really a wizard, and all Dan could do was warn her. She'd come by from time to time, but nothing'd changed. She'd plead for him to say something, anything besides a warning not to enter the mansion, and he'd warn her not to enter the mansion.
The immortality definitely came as a blessing.. What fun was warning if people kept on bothering you with things not having to do with warning? He'd warn them, accentuating the "STAY AWAY" bit of his mantra so they'd get the point to get lost. Then, as his friends died off, he stayed and warned.
He found he was awfully good at warning.
He never wanted to stop.
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