What do you think of this new storyline?

[KyriakosCH]

I started a new work, yesterday. Probably something to be "completed" at around 25 pages, as my usual recent larger works... The storyline is (on the surface anyway) about a discovery in an apartment. It is narrated as the notes of the person renting there. However, iteration appears already in the first page, given it is shown that this narrator had himself found a letter there by a previous tenant. The narrator is not sure if he will leave his own letter for a next one (but you already could suppose he did, given you read the story in the first place-- unless you got to the letter by more special relation to the strange narrator).

The apartment seems to have an issue with small pieces of red paper appearing, mostly near one of the walls. They aren't much of a problem regarding garbage being accumulated, cause they seem to max out at a small number, and they are very small in the first place. But if taken away they will soon re-appear.

The story is set to on the one hand present (with allusions) the main theory the previous tenant had about the red pieces of paper, and also give the different view of the writer of the story. The previous tenant more or less believed (with a number of reasons, but the writer does not seem to accept them much) that those bits of red paper are actually created on the spot, and not left by something.
But the writer does agree with the previous tenant that the red papers are not really one shade of red; they are revealed to consist of tonal scales of red. Which ties significantly to what the previous tenant imagined by the end was happening (and which was definitely alarming)

-What do you think of the storyline? (obviously not too much is revealed of it here, but i am interested in reading your impression ).

[Jack]

Hard to say when you can't give more details, but it sounds thin. As in, mysterious happenings shouldn't carry a story alone just for the sake of mystery.

[KyriakosCH]

Oh, it's not carrying the story. It is in fact the outer surface of what - supposedly - is going on.
A bit like an error message while a code is still allowed to run.

[Stupot]

I think it sounds alright. Hard to know without more context (but then again, I dont want spoilers) but it contains two things I love in stories: letters written to whichever next stranger happens to read them, and things that keep reappearing no matter how hard you try to get rid of them.

I'll be looking forward to the finished piece.