Fortnightly Writing Competition - ALTERNATIVE TRUTH (Results)

[kconan]

Either kconan put a lot of time into looking through Baron's old posts or he knows Baron's post way too well off the top of his head. Are you cyber-stalking Baron, kconan? Be honest, it's just between us.

Oh it felt weird at various points, lots of skimming and reading old posts...I'll release a brief "making of" after the comp.


Best Alternative Truth: Frodo's sentient being works along with his paranoid delivery.

Best Alternative Truth Spouter: Mandle, as his character's ruse works.

Best Alternative to a Plot: Ponch's newspaper.

Best Alternative Writing: Sinitrena, as I like the idea of kids debating "what is truth?" and trying to wrap their head around it when we usually have adults either debating or spouting mis-truths.

Best Alternative Thought Provokingness: Sinitrena takes this category because her entry got me thinking about kids wondering if facts or truths are really supposed to be a hazy and imprecise thing, and if they understand how bias comes into play.  Also, I went down a dark mental rabbit hole of how the current "facts don't matter" environment will affect our kids now and future generations.

[Ponch]

Best Alternative Truth: Mandle
Best Alternative Truth Spouter: Kconan
Best Alternative to a Plot: Sinitrena
Best Alternative Writing: Kconan
Best Alternative Thought Provokingness: Frodo

[Mandle]

I'm going to vote tonight after work, so please keep voting open for a bit longer!

I want to give comments on my votes and need a bit more time later on to do so.

[Mandle]

Best Alternative Truth: Ponch (comment redacted)
Best Alternative Truth Spouter: Sinitrena (comment redacted)
Best Alternative to a Plot: Frodo (comment redacted)
Best Alternative Writing: Sinitrena (comment redacted)
Best Alternative Thought Provokingness: Kconan (comment redacted)

[Baron]

And voting is now closed.  Except for the hanging chad variety, which will dangle over the results indefinitely.   I think I can say, without even a hint of hubris, that this was the best writing competition in the history of ever.   If you don't believe me then you're obviously a commie spy who enjoys clubbing your own fuzzy animals to make ostentatious fur coats.   But let's step away from the truth for a bit and stray in to the soft quagmire of facts for a moment.  The fact is that we have a bunch of votes, some of which might have been cast by legitimate AGSers.  Not to cast doubt on the process, but I forgot to check the papers of everyone who showed up to the polls, so the whole thing was probably rigged anyway.   But whatever, these are the results we've got, and I'm too tired to tamper with them any more than I already have, so let's just call it a day and go watch some boxing.

Winning the Golden Hairpiece of Alternative Wisdom with an alarming 7 votes is the thoroughly discredited reprobate kconan of Outer Moldavia.  Clearly his Bat-Boy-esque good looks charmed the electorate, distracting them from his track record of yellow journalism and blatant character assassinations.  Well done, sir!

Winning the Silver Hairpiece of Probably Would Have Won If The Other Side Weren't A Bunch Of Cheating Scum with an almost-too-close-to-call 6 votes is the virtuous and beautiful Sinitrena.  We can only hope that in the balance of time the courts will exercise their benign tyranny and restore her to her true place as reigning queen of the FWC.

Winning the Bronze Hairpiece of Third Party Wilderness is Frodo and Mandle.  Ponch would have shared in the glory too if he could have resisted using the T-word in his entry, so he was docked one vote as per the constitution, that revered document in the OP that I will unswervingly uphold as long as it seems to support my agenda.  Excellent writing all around!

And so here is the point in the process where I'm supposed to step down gracefully to make way for the new guy.  Unfortunately, I regret to inform you that I am hereby unilaterally suspending the FWC constitution by appointing myself president for life.  My lizard-people minions will inform you of the details with the ends of their whips and halberds.  BUWUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

[Frodo]

Winning the Bronze Hairpiece of Third Party Wilderness is Frodo and Mandle.  [/img]

Bronze hairpieces are all the rage, don't you know! 

[Mandle]

Winning the Bronze Hairpiece of Third Party Wilderness is Frodo and Mandle.  [/img]

Bronze hairpieces are all the rage, don't you know! 

Bronze is the new gold!

[Ponch]

Winning the Bronze Hairpiece of Third Party Wilderness is Frodo and Mandle.  [/img]

Bronze hairpieces are all the rage, don't you know! 

Bronze is the new gold!

Indeed it is!

[Baron]

Asterix!  No, no, no, no....  I think not.   How about:

[Ponch]

Asterix!  No, no, no, no....  I think not.   How about:

You changed the requirements after I submitted my entry. I changed the conditions necessary for winning a trophy after you declared the winners.

I humbly accept my third and a half place trophy and congratulate the other winners.

[Baron]

Asterix!  No, no, no, no....  I think not.   How about:

You changed the requirements after I submitted my entry. I changed the conditions necessary for winning a trophy after you declared the winners.

I humbly accept my third and a half place trophy and congratulate the other winners.

You're misconstruing the facts after I rightfully misconstrued them first!   We'll just have to let the lizard-people minions sort this all out with their scythes of judgement....

[kconan]

  So I spent roughly 45 minutes to an hour skimming the back half of Baron's non-Swarm, non-forum game, and non-"I like the cut of your jib, yous got moxie kid"-newbie thread posts and would jot down the post number for later review when something caught my eye.  Skimming/reading I chuckled often, and occasionally had a deep thought or two.  There is only one big deleted scene:  I took some itinerary Baron had posted and really "truthed" it up...but then I saw it had some personal stuff on there and so it went to the cutting room floor.  I was going to use the Dung Shoveler game, and then I stumbled across Baron's Tree Planting Simulator like an old prospector striking a large vein of gold.

  Anyways...Fun round!  Congrats to Sinitrena, and the vast multitudes of bronze hairpiece recipients.  I'll start a new comp in a few days.

[Baron]

While I'm still disappointed that you didn't take me to task over my refusal to climb the learning curve for Al-Quest 1, I still thought it was a hilarious idea.  I look forward to my next opportunity for vengeance the next competition!

[kconan]

  Before I put up the next comp, I want to know...Have we done the Faustian bargain as a theme before?  Basically. something like a literal or figurative deal with the Devil?  It feels familiar, though I couldn't find anything from searching previous comps on the forums.

[Sinitrena]

First of all, congratulations kconan, that was an amazing "story".

Second, I don't think we ever had deals with the devil as a topic before, as far as I remember. I could be mistaken, of course, but I know for a fact that I never entered this topic.

[Baron]

I can't see anything in my records for the last 5 years.  Go for it!