Fortnightly Writing Competition: MUTATE (Winners Inside!)

Started by Ghost, Sat 28/06/2014 17:05:49

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Stupot

Sorry, it's not gonna happen. I realized a glaring plot hole and to fix it would mean starting a new story from scratch. I'm out. :-(

Ghost

#21
Quote from: Stupot+ on Tue 15/07/2014 12:04:04
Sorry, it's not gonna happen. ... I'm out. :-(
Aw man, sorry to hear that. But well, I think we're all done with the extension, and can head over to the voting bit. Thanks to everyone who submitted a story:

* "Untitled", by Kconan
* "Drowned Park", by Sinitrena
* "Eat Your Greens", by Baron

As has become standard, you are allowed to cast up to three votes. Think of it as "Gold, Silver, Bronze". Gold is worth 3 points, Bronze 1 point. Silver is worth
2.211242 points and a bagle.
Here are the categories:
Mutation - Who had the most interesting, gut-wrenching, funny or scientifically possible change of... things?
Atmosphere - Who managed to best create a sense of whatever you expect when you read "someone mutates"?
Style - who wrote best, had the most awesome words, and generally managed to NOT spell the "teh"?
Character - who introduced the most interesting, likable, relatable, or awesomely rejectable character?

Whoever gets the most overall votes wins and gets to feel like a winner (nod) Should we get a tie I'll cast a vote myself.

selmiak

Mutation - Sinitrena
Atmosphere - Sinitrena
Style - Sinitrena
Character - Sinitrena

yeah, all 3 stories are interesting but Sinitrena easily wrote the best of the 3.

Sinitrena

Mutation: kconan - The devil worm mutation sounds scary. It's all in all a good description. What I didn't like so much is that the main character basically passes out at the and of half of the paragraphs. A different transition to the next step would be good, I think.
Atmosphere: Baron - Classic superhero transformation here but with an unusual hero. It works because it's mainly a comedic story, though at the same time the hardship of getting old comes across too. What I missed was at least a pseudo explanation for where the Carnivator come from at exactly the same time as the Veggie Man. (I just hate coincidences like that - personal taste, I guess. I realize that it really wasn't an improtant detail for this kind of story.)
Style: Baron
Character: kconan

I thouroughly enjoyed both stories and can't say I like one more then the other. I think they would both benefit from being longer, though.

kconan

Mutation: Sinitrena - Unpredictable and unique mutation
Atmosphere: Baron - Bringin' the funny
Style: Baron - Great exposition and setup had me wanting more...
Character: Baron - For Arnold Arkwright

Baron

Quote from: Ghost on Tue 15/07/2014 14:48:35
As has become standard, you are allowed to cast up to three votes. Think of it as "Gold, Silver, Bronze". Gold is worth 3 points, Bronze 1 point. Silver is worth
2.211242 points and a bagle.

Er.... OK. ;-D

Mutation kconan: I thought his slow transition into a human-devil worm hybrid was thorough and gritty.  I don't know about the scientific possibilities, but it was hilarious to consider a man-sized quasi-worm with half appendages worming itself through the subsoil! ;-D

Atmosphere Sinitrena: For "gold", since her take on a disbeliever's perspective of the mystical ceremony and metamorphic process was very insightful
kconan: for "Silver/Bagel", for the classic mutation atmosphere of medical quarantine with gadgets and guys in lab-coats.

Style - kconan: The lingo of the job site really sold it for me: "digit-heads", "ol' twisty", impressive sounding corporate divisions.  Also Sinitrena forgot to proof read this time.   ;)

Character Sinitrena: I don't think he was ever named, but I could certainly empathize with her main character's train of thought.  The complexities of the character's outlook (believing in magic but not in gods, for example) made for some really interesting contradictions within his mind.  Kconan's characters were more straight up, which is understandable given his plot (smart-witted adventurers don't really go for roughneck drilling jobs), but it hurt his chances in this category.

Great stories, folks!  As always, a pleasure to read.  I especially liked the closure that I got from kconan's piece -he's going to make it!  For Sinitrena's I have to wonder: will he ever be more than just a one pond fish?

Quote from: Sinitrena on Tue 15/07/2014 21:17:17
What I missed was at least a pseudo explanation for where the Carnivator come from at exactly the same time as the Veggie Man. (I just hate coincidences like that - personal taste, I guess. I realize that it really wasn't an improtant detail for this kind of story.)

Yeah, you got me!  I ran out of time to make a longer piece explaining more, and didn't want to stretch the story over too many time intervals (I find it reads more like a history than a story if I have to list events over weeks and months).  So I needed a device to show off Veggie Man's power, and I just picked the most polar opposite thing I could to a gentle nonogenarian vegetable lover: a wrathful domineering 4 storey ultimate carnivore!  Where this enigmatic and horrible villain emerged from in the story universe will, unfortunately, have to remain a mystery until the next exciting instalment of Veggie Man!

kconan

Quote from: Baron on Thu 17/07/2014 03:53:22
I especially liked the closure that I got from kconan's piece -he's going to make it!

I forced myself to deviate from my norm of violence that culminates into an unhappy or cliffhanger ending.  So yep, first time I can remember writing a happy ending.

Baron

Like a palm tree in a typhoon, kconan's always turning over new leaves. ;-D  What?  Is it too late to win you all over with flowery (or at least vegetative... ) metaphors? (roll)

kconan


Ghost

#29
Don't think so... and hells, the votes are clear! While each and every story got at least one vote, only one writer got a bagle!

First place goes to KConan
Second place goes to Baron
Third place (and a bagle) goes to Sinitrena

I apologize for the absence of trophies this time. I can't explain how they got lost, but they did.

Annnnnnyway, Kconan, you're next- amaze us!


Holy miscountings, Batman! To the RECOUNT CAVE!

kconan

  Cool!!  But wait...did you count Selmiak's votes?  I thought I had lost this one!?  Or maybe I am totally misunderstanding the voting system.

  I'll gladly take it, however, if the recount proves me victorious

Baron


Ghost

Yeah now this IS awkward. I should clearly NOT post that early in the mornings after not sleeping and stuff.
SORRY!

1st place: Sinistrena
2nd place: Baron
3rd place: Kconan

Sinitrena

Quote from: Ghost on Tue 22/07/2014 16:26:04
Yeah now this IS awkward. I should clearly NOT post that early in the mornings after not sleeping and stuff.
SORRY!

1st place: Sinistrena
2nd place: Baron
3rd place: Kconan

And then you get the voting right and spell my name wrong (laugh) (laugh) (laugh)

Thanks for your votes, guys.

Ghost

Quote from: Sinitrena on Tue 22/07/2014 17:02:08
And then you get the voting right and spell my name wrong (laugh) (laugh) (laugh)

So fail. Very faults. Oooouch.

Baron

I want one more recount, just to be sure.... :=

Congratulations Sinistrena (or whoever you are... ;) )!  A well-deserved victory snatched from the jaws of fatigue.  Look forward to reading everyone again next round!


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