BIOTHLEBOP WON! - Monthly Writing Contestinator - March

Tuomas · Thu 13/04/2006 20:43:01

http://www.magintz.com/upload/JackDrake.doc

Note that the main character is not Jack, it's Richard Drake. This is a sad story. I was too eager and started too long a story, which I never finished (yet). I like it though, I might finish it some day.
Ã,Â Ã,Â Yet I thought I'd enter this with it, just to show some respect for a great theme, and for my work not to be in vain. If you wish to know how it's supposed to end, ask me. I won't give spoilers here.
Ã,Â Ã,Â You can see that the first chapter is much longer by ways of telling than the others, I was away a lot and it turned out a busy task. So I'm leaving this today, I will be away until monday, so delaying this wouldn't help at all.
Ã,Â Ã,Â Special thanks to Babar & Obi for being my everyday muses when I was in a dead end, and to Magintz who let me upload it to his server.

And I am double posting on purpose so that this thread would come back on top of the list and we'd get people to read this stuff, my stuff at least.

voh · Sat 15/04/2006 21:54:11

Voting has now started, and will run until the 20th!

I will chime in with my votes when it's not time to go out and have fun on a saturday evening

MashPotato · Sun 16/04/2006 06:16:29

Interesting takes on the theme of Film Noir... when I first started reading, I didn't expect that I would see such a wide range of storiesÃ,Â

My vote goes to Biothlebop for evoking the atmosphere of Noir while taking it into an unexpected direction.

Tuomas · Sun 16/04/2006 17:57:52

I'll have to go with Biothlebop as well, sorry guys, but he sticked to the topic or at least how I saw it, the best. And he finished his story

Congrats on getting my vote.

voh · Mon 17/04/2006 23:54:20

I'm going for Biothlebop as well, as his story was the most coherent and noir.

Though all the stories were a treat to read!

MarVelo · Tue 18/04/2006 02:05:22

Biothebop gets my vote. He wrote in the original noir sense. When I visualized it, I actually saw everything in black and white. lol

biothlebop · Wed 19/04/2006 11:49:43

Taffytom: I liked your story. Although it seemed a little naive, you chose an enviroment that you clearly knew and could bring to life.

cookieswithmilk: This was very nice as well. It certainly set me into that grim Max-payneish version of film noir.
I would have liked a little more variation or a downtoning of the style, now the gritty three word sentences fragmented and eclipsed the story.

Tuomas: This one was my favourite and also gets my vote. Although it was over-ambitious and I didn't always understand where it was going or if it was going anywhere, after a reread I got it to hold together and the natural writing style charmed me.

Cookieswithmilk · Thu 20/04/2006 02:53:44

Sorry if I come off a bit pessimistic, it's just what I do

Taffytom's was good, but the high-school setting just doesn't seem right to me... never been able to take high schoolers seriously, despite me being 18 heh

Tuomas' was kinda confusing and long without an ending proper, but fit together very well!

Biothlebop's was the best, it reminded me of film noir more than any of the others. The ending confused me a little, seemed out of line... But it still gets the vote from me. Great job!

I like to criticize my stuff too; of course it was very cheesy. Cliches all over the place. Was fun to put the hell/devil references in, though.

voh · Thu 20/04/2006 15:32:10

Well, since all but biothlebop's votes went to biothlebop, it seems biothlebop has won!

You can go create a new challenge! (make it a good one, I want to compete

)

biothlebop · Thu 20/04/2006 15:53:36

I'd like to thank everyone who read it even if it made them sick. Although this is done on an amateur level, getting votes and positive comments is still very motivating, especially since I had not written much fiction earlier and was unsure if everything I'd write would be utter shit.
New competition soon.