Hi,
this is supposed to be the intro screen for my game "The Refuge". But I don't know if you can identify the situation. Could you tell me, what is it you see in that picture? Any other suggestions designwise?
[imgzoom]http://i.imgur.com/Cv7Bmyq.png[/imgzoom]
A man in a dark place looking at a sunset through a window? The color scheme looks nice anyway...
Looks more like a door and road, than grass with tyre tracks. Or even a picture at first glance.
I would use more vivid colors for oudside.
On small mobile screen it looks like a jukebox :)
I thought it was a theater with a stage, but on a closer look I'm not sure. A sunset, with a building that might be a factory (seems to be a smokestack spewing smoke, or it could just be a tower with a cloud behind it).
I didn't even notice the head of the guy at first.
In conclusion, it's too dark and murky to tell.
I think also that's too dark (I have a dark screen), so can't see much.
I'm not sure what I see, first I thought it was someone looking at a painting, then maybe "the light at the end of the tunnel", but knowing a bit about your project, I'm guessing that maybe it's a guy looking out at "his home in flames" (or an explosion) from the back of a truck? Like you showing why he's living his home and life as he knows it behind.
Try increasing the contrast, so that the outside is brighter and more light comes into the truck. (If that's what it is)
Think also that the lighting on the inside of the truck might be wrong, like the under the opening you have some "light lines" showing. My eyes say that should be completly dark, cause of the light contrast between the "bright outside" against the "dark inside" where the only light source is outside.
But I might be interpeting your picture all wrong, in that case forget what I wrote. ;)
it looks like a man in a tunnel watching an explosion or something like that.. if its an explosion you should add more colors or contrast to the explosion if you know what i mean, but when Cassiebsg said that the man is watching an explosion or flames from the back of the truck I can totally see it, so i think if the player will know the story well, the player will know what that is.
I hope that you understand me :-D
Looks like a man in the back of a train looking at the life he's leaving behind (roll)
This thread is really interesting psychologically. I get the feeling the picture is acting like a Rorschach Test on people.
Could be some deep personal insights hiding in those posts folks!
(Only half-joking...)
Veeeeery interesting what you guys see. The Jukebox made me giggle ^^
Thanks for your participation. It helps a lot.
Cassiebsg is correct. It is supposed to be my player character watching his town shattered and in flames on the back of a truck. That "light lines" are just stuff I missed. :-D But is the lighting on the steel-frame correct?
Anyone got an idea how to make the truck more like what it's supposed to be, so that more people than Cassie and Gatata will recognize it? :)
Here is an update with a more dynamic looking flame/ explosion and I chose another color for the tarp and slightly changed the steel frame.
[imgzoom]http://i.imgur.com/6ynEdaj.png[/imgzoom]
I was thinking "theatre" like Snarky at first - and even after you told us, I find it difficult to see the back of a truck in this picture, to be honest. But context certainly helps in this regard. When theres text / voiceover that tells me that he sadly looks back at his hometown, it is easier to see.
But I think the best solution would be movement: The back of the truck stays the same, while the town becomes smaller and smaller and the smoke of the fire gets thicker. Of course, that's unfortunately not really feasible for an intro screen... :-\
Great start!
Some suggestions:
* Add some details inside of the truck, maybe something that looks like it could be a door or a handle. It just looks to me like some very small archway right now.
* The fire does look like a sunset or a big campfire at best, to me. If you want to communicate that a town -- as in several wooden buildings -- are being razed in flames, then you need more there, there. And by there I mean bigass flames, engulfing actual buildings.
(http://www.fairyist.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/warrenpoint-on-fire.jpg)
You don't need to make the pic hi-res or anything, but consider having a partially-disintegrated house' silhouette in dark black over a mass of flames. Flames licking up through the windows. You kind of have a disembodied orangey-yellow blob right now, which is why it is a very good psychoanalytical tool. And that can be intentional, if you want to disorient the player, make the game intentionally vague, but if you want them to get that 'the town is on fire' I don't think it works.
* Things close to that fire should be really freakin' daylight-bright. A town on fire is like a giant million-watt lamp. It's a little too muted. Blast objects, trees, the ground, those non-burning houses with spotlights.
* Brighten up that road a bit so it's easier to tell it's a road. That will help the player to register the truck as well.
Just my two cents.
Yup. I still don't really understand how that's a truck (I just see a series of archways that I can't work out how they relate to each other spatially â€" I also can't tell that it's supposed to be steel and not stone or cement). Could you post a picture of the kind of truck you mean?
It's still a bit too dark for me, and beyond that I think the shapes are just a bit too vague and generic: specific, identifiable detail would go a long way to help us recognize "this is a burning building, this is the back of a truck", etc.
I also thought that was a theater stage!:shocked:
The person is on the balcony and look down on the stage!
Quote from: Martyn on Thu 22/10/2015 13:25:28
I also thought that was a theater stage!:shocked:
The person is on the balcony and look down on the stage!
Ditto.
I saw:
Spoiler
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-RhzsUEK03T8/UbAfAb5wM-I/AAAAAAAAGFM/RFwrrQiWpBI/s1600/watchmen+butterfly.jpg)
Aaand another one. Do you notice any improvements? Is it now a guy in a truck watching his town? :-\
Thanks for your help guys!
[imgzoom]http://i.imgur.com/QAgKRLA.png[/imgzoom]
I think this is the kind of truck Kumpel has in mind:
(https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/98/Russian_GAZ-military_truck,_2007.jpg)
Which means you steal frames are way too thick. They should be not much thicker than a finger. And the cover cloth should have folds and falling inside.
I agree with Sinitrena, that you should use this as an animated cut scene, instead of a background.
If well done, you wouldn't even need text to transmit the message. ;)
To be honest the first one looked to me like a guy in a gallery staring at a Chirico's (https://chechar.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/chirico_piazza.jpg) painting and the second one seems to me like a guy looking into a steam locomotive fire box.
Doesn't AGS have a shake screen function? You could use that (sparsly) to simulate driving on a bumpy road.
Me too as a theatre!
I think the most major issue is that the horizon seems to be parallel to the base of the truck opening (instead of being...horizontal), so it makes it look like something connected to that- like a stage.
I worked up an idea for what you might do to make the town look like a town on fire. Just throw some things that look like actual buildings. You need the reference point there for the human eye to detect scale.
[imgzoom]http://i.imgur.com/QAgKRLA.png[/imgzoom]
[imgzoom]http://i.imgur.com/N0EmIji.jpg[/imgzoom]
See the difference? The little black squiggles were an improvement, but they could still just be a pile of firewood. Put some rectangular upright things in there that resemble buildings.
I should have mentioned that my "squiggles" resemble a burning car wreck. Making it more clear looks odd I think.
The fire actually isn't far from the truck. They actually just drove by. so your suggestions with this house looks off perspectivewise.
Maybe I will thin the frame a bit. but i've seen pictures of trucks with almost as thick frames as mine.
And the hint with the horizontal line is really helpful. i will definitely think about that too.
I am actually much happier with it now. Thanks again guys.
Please comment on if you like!
It's better, but now it mostly looks like a car crash. I still think you need more town on fire. More fire in the background, less soft evening-light-looking, more dramatic and stark? One's home on fire is a terrible thing, man! And this is your opening shot; punch up the drama and grab the player!
now we talking!
that bench made it!
Just one more think for you to think about, but think you might have the focus wrong.
Atm you are focusing the image on the man and the truck, while the outside is a blur, but you probably really want the opposite. After all that's where the message you are trying to convey is, and also where the character's focus is.
I see your point but could you elaborate on this? Are you suggesting the POV of the scene doesn't work? :X
A friend just told me he sees a man besides a cozy oven... I am freaking out xD
The POV works fine IMHO, it's the focus that maybe not so much.
Try doing the inside of the truck and the man more a blur (but don't lose the man's shape) and the outside more sharp and defined, so that you won't have a doubt that that's a city, a car, a street, an explosion, flames... And if you are up to it, then do a few extra frames so the "town" gets further away and you see "movement" in the street/road.
Might be worth a try and see if then everyone can see the same as you do. ;)
I believe that the metal arches inside the truck are brighter than they should be, since everything else in the truck is covered in darkness and only lit up from the fire outside. They also draw away focus from the face and the fire. And the tears on his cheek are too dark, unless he has a lot of mascara tears don't leave black trails.
So NOW I think I can say "finally!".
[imgzoom]http://i.imgur.com/krXRi7H.png[/imgzoom]
What do you guys think?
Now that relates a story.
Much better! It looks captivating.
Yes, much better. ;-D
Try adding a pinch of white to the tear(s) and don't make the eyes a "black hole". Cause right now he looks like he's got black paint where his eyes are... like in a censured poster, where they put a black box over the censured part.
But other than that it looks great to me. No doubt what it is. (nod)
Loving this most recent iteration. Very nice.