Lady Lost
It's just before noon and I'm on my way to the gym. The weather is pretty nice and I think happy thoughts as I approach the bridge which leads over the highway, not far from my home.
On a small street just before the bridge an old lady has stopped her car, blocking the traffic and causing angry drivers to honk their horns and overtake her with upset gestures. She seems mildly confused and looks rather desperately in my direction.
The time I spent working in the nursing home has implanted in my reptile brain an instinctive readiness to assist the elderly, so I cross the street and ask her what's wrong.
- I'm looking for Omvägen, she says after having wound down the window.
I start describing the rather complicated route to Omvägen, which is a small street in the middle of another student area. After having repeated the way some three or four times without the slightest sign of mental clarity in this aged woman's face, I realise that Omvägen is actually on the way to my gym, and I offer to go with her and direct her. I even propose that I drive her there myself, assessing her driving ability as slightly challenged.
- Oh yes, I'd really appreciate that, she responds gratefully. So I put my bag in her trunk and sit down in the driver's seat, with my knees almost touching my chin, and start to make my way through the rather busy traffic. In the backseat lies a huge dog, watching his new driver with a limited interest.
The lady chats merrily during the entire ride, and regularly makes small comments like:
"Yeah, I recognise that petrol station", "ahh, that building seems familiar", "this is probably the right way".
After some fifteen minutes of slow traffic we finally reach the area where Omvägen is located, and I start looking for a good parking space. Then, like a hammer blow, it hits me. I've confused the streets. The street I had in mind was Omgången. One moment later I realise that Omvägen is actually just a few blocks away from where I had found the woman. So for fifteen minutes I have achieved nothing more than bringing this lady several kilometers farther from her goal.
- I seem to have mixed the streets, I admit.
- Really? Well, I thought it seemed a bit wrong, she mumbles. For a brief moment of bad cosmic energy I actually contemplate leaving the car, the dog and her to their fate, lost in some remote area without any hope of ever reaching their destination. At least I have come more than halfway to my destination. But of course I cannot do this.
- However, I continue, I remember now where your street is, and I will take you there.
This strikes the lady as an even greater act of benevolence, even though it is in fact just a matter of repairing the damage I had done. Still in a surprisingly good mood, she converses about weather and politics until we finally reach the point of our first meeting. She doesn't display any special sign of recognition, but appear generally content with whatever happens. I have a vague idea of how to get to the final destination, and to my great relief I manage to find the street just minutes later, merely a few blocks away.
- This is it, I say and stop the engine. - Sorry for wasting your time.
But the lady obviously has not realised fully the pointlessness of my efforts, for she is unabatedly grateful and simply in great awe before my magnanimity.
- There will be a place in heaven for you, my dear, God bless you!
- But....ah well.
So I take my bag from her trunk, say good bye and start walking towards the gym, which is now, after some forty minutes of time and petrol wastage, even farther away.
Some time is lost. But I earned a place in heaven!
apparently to be with god you need a cruel master