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Creative Production => Recruitment => Topic started by: KiraHaraReturns on 23 Sep 2018, 22:40

Title: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: KiraHaraReturns on 23 Sep 2018, 22:40
hey,
I need your support simply by proofreading my web-comic and translating it into decent english.

Thank you in advance for your response,
Brick Jove

(https://image.ibb.co/dgY12U/01_stenography.png)

(https://image.ibb.co/esRFU9/02_depression.png)
Title: Re: web comic - proofreader wanted
Post by: Mandle on 24 Sep 2018, 17:25
If you can copy/paste all the text sections in here I can give it a try...
Title: Re: web comic - proofreader wanted
Post by: KiraHaraReturns on 24 Sep 2018, 21:21
If you can copy/paste all the text sections in here I can give it a try...
of course:
01.   Stenography
stenography is a writing method that can be learnt at university  by transcribing the whole stuff your professor wrote on the blackboard during years of study
I am speaking here from my own experience. the only person, who is able to read my own handwriting is myself
What the heck is this
today I'm an assembly line labourer
It has been worthwhile...
2. Depression
THE WORLD IS MEAN AND VICIOUS
AFTER WORK I NEED A HANDFUL OF PAIN-KILLERS JUST to relax my ACHING body
...Even though I lift  a dozen tons a day , I'm still skinny not able to gain muscle...
the main reason for my bad condition should be laziness and poor diet consisting of carbs instead of proteins
I can't afford to buy high quality products
my wallet is full of paper waste and small cash
on top of this nobody is interested in ...  my artistic creation ...
mew
Ach! Who cares?


Title: Re: web comic - proofreader wanted
Post by: Mandle on 26 Sep 2018, 02:43
Sweet!

A bit busy today with other projects, but I'll have a go soon!
Title: Re: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: KiraHaraReturns on 03 Oct 2018, 12:27
(https://image.ibb.co/bVXEde/mandela_effect.png)
3. Mandela effect
I was on the way home at night
I simply stopped because I have had to empty my bladder as suddenly…
I threw a coin inside…
If the ground doesn't exist, I could jump in
… but I heard nothing
So I did without hesitation
I was falling and falling until a light at the end appeared
I felt like thrown upwards losing all the speed
Next morning
contrary to appearances it turned out, that I've got into a parallel universe
Title: Re: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: Creamy on 03 Oct 2018, 13:20
Hi Kira,

I like the surreal tone of the last page.

IMO you should leave a gap between each upper and lower panel. Currently, it's not easy to spot which text refers to which panel.
Title: Re: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: KiraHaraReturns on 03 Oct 2018, 13:38
Hi Kira,

I like the surreal tone of the last page.

IMO you should leave a gap between each upper and lower panel. Currently, it's not easy to spot which text refers to which panel.
thanks, I realized that flaw afterwards too
Title: Re: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: Danvzare on 04 Oct 2018, 12:52
Here's my proof reading:

3. Mandela effect
I was on my way home at night
I stopped because I had to empty my bladder, when suddenly…
I threw a coin inside…
If the ground doesn't exist, I could jump in
… but I heard nothing
So I did without hesitation
I was falling and falling until a light at the end appeared
I felt like I had been thrown upwards, losing all speed
Next morning
Contrary to appearances it turned out, that I've ended up in a parallel universe
Title: Re: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: KiraHaraReturns on 04 Oct 2018, 13:00
@Danvzare
thank you very much, here's the next part

(https://image.ibb.co/i4E36z/04_batman_eng.png)
4.batman
I disguised myself as BATMAN again
now I'm ready to save the world
together with SUPER-GIRL
sorry, but this will not work
whuay?
v1
Because I became pregnant
and now fuck off from my residence before Superman comes back
v2
your rant makes me bellyache dude
remember you once and for all, it's definitely toooo late to save something
Title: Re: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: Mandle on 05 Oct 2018, 00:35
Sorry for losing track of this. Still too busy, but happy that others have jumped on board to help out. ;-D
Title: Re: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: KiraHaraReturns on 07 Oct 2018, 21:45
(https://image.ibb.co/kiHauU/05_gambit_eng.png)
I like chess, it helps relaxing...
one or two games on my favorite chess-portal and I feel great again
let's begin
after a few tactical moves...
haha!!! what a noob! I will checkmate him in four moves!
This guy is bloody weak, I could beat him without seeing the board!
Ou yeah! Let's change to the blind mode!
You will be astonished soon...
one...
two...
three..
and f#ck, how could I've missed it!!!
Title: Re: Web comic - Proofreader wanted
Post by: Danvzare on 08 Oct 2018, 15:23
4.batman
I've disguised myself as BATMAN again
now I'm ready to save the world
together with SUPER-GIRL
sorry, but this will not work
whuay?
v1
Because I've become pregnant
so now fuck off from my residence before Superman comes back
v2
your rant makes my bellyache dude
Besides it's too late to save anything

(I had to change that last line a lot, because it just didn't make any sense to me.)





I like chess, it helps me relax...
one or two games on my favorite chess-portal and I feel great again
let's begin
after a few tactical moves...
haha!!! what a noob! I will checkmate him in four moves!
This guy is bloody weak, I could beat him without seeing the board!
Oh yeah! Let's change to blind mode!
You will be astonished soon...
one...
two...
three..
and f#ck, how could I miss it!!!