Fortnightly Writing Competition - CONCRETE POETRY: FESTIVE EDITION (Winner!)

Started by Sinitrena, Sun 29/11/2015 17:21:44

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Sinitrena

Hello and welcome to a brand new Fortnightly Writing Competition!

This time around, we'll try something a bit different.

Concrete Poetry is a form of poetry where the visual element is as important as the words, or, as Wikipedia puts it:
QuoteConcrete, pattern, or shape poetry is poetry in which the typographical arrangement of words is as important in conveying the intended effect as the conventional elements of the poem, such as meaning of words, rhythm, rhyme, and so on.

It is sometimes referred to as visual poetry, a term that has come to have distinct meaning of its own, but which shares the distinction of being poetry in which the visual elements are as important as the text.

The easiest kind of concrete poetry are texts that are arranged in the shape of the meaning of the words they use:


Apfel by Reinhard Dohl (1965)
[Apfel is german for apple; Wurm means worm.]



The most common form is probably the kind where the text is just arranged in a way to follow the shape, disregarding length of words:





A more difficult kind is where length of words and verses is more or less followed and creates the intended shape almost automaticly:


Die Trichter by Christian Morgenstern (1905)
(This one actually rhymes as well.)

[Translation found here:

The Funnels

A funnel ambles through the night. [it should be two funnels; it's still a good translation...]
Within its body, moonbeams white
converge as they
descend upon
its forest
pathway
and
so
on]
(Sorry for the formating of the translation. This should also give you a hint that it's better to post pictures in this round.)



And last but not least, there's the most abstract kind where words don't seem to exist anymore:


Fisches Nachtgesang (Night Song of Fish) by Christian Morgenstern (1905)




So, I think you can imagine why I showed you all this? That's right! This time around I want you to write a piece of concrete poetry. Whether it is just a single word or a whole story, a poem with rhymes and rhythm or no words in the classic sense at all - that's all up to you, as long as the connection between the words and the shape is strong (and don't write a text and add a picture to it, that's not what this is about). And because we're in the festive season, it should have something to do with this: a snowflake, a christmas tree, a candle, etc. - it's up to you.

(As mentioned above, it's probably best to post all entries as pictures, so that the forum doesn't screw up the formating.)


The voting categories will reflect this unusual kind of poetry. We'll have the following:

Text: If you remove all visual elements, does the text still mean something? Is it well written, in a good style? Does it tell a story?
Shape: If you remove the language element, is it a good and interesting picture? How well is the artistic execution? This is the category for all visual elements.
Correlation: How well do text and shape fit together? Does the text add to the picture? Does the picture add to the text?

As you can see, writing and art are equally important this time around.


I hope I didn't scare you off and see a lot of poems in this Fortnightly Writing Competition - it's easier than you might think.

Deadline: 14. December.

Happy writing!

Sane Co.


Sinitrena

Thank you so much, Sane Co., for being the first (and hopefully not the last) to accept this challange. :=


(see, they are easy; not an entry, obviously)

ONe week left, guys!

selmiak


Sinitrena

Look! There are trophies:

       

Now get your last minute entries in. :-D

Ibispi



EDIT: done as you asked! : )



: )

Sinitrena

@Ibispi Thank you for your entry. But I think you should consider posting it as a picture. It looks fine from my laptop but on my tablet, the formatting is completley botched.

selmiak

put it into pictures you say...
Spoiler
[close]

Baron


MiteWiseacreLives!

Those last two entries are something else! Selmiak's could be put into print and hung on office and high school library walls immediately! Although Baron's makes has teh drawings of my soles into inside teh univurse and nuthing at wunce  8-0

selmiak

baron dis is teh brulliantz. Does he haves teh clockwoerkings orenges eyebrowez? Redingz dis makez my headdiez teh dizzyiez (laugh)

Adeel

Quote from: MiteWiseacreLives! on Tue 15/12/2015 04:34:11
Those last two entries are something else! Selmiak's could be put into print and hung on office and high school library walls immediately!

Highly agree!

Quote from: selmiak on Mon 14/12/2015 00:39:59
put it into pictures you say...
Spoiler
[close]

You should consider selling this, mein freund!

Sinitrena

So many compliments already and we haven't even started voting yet. Well, let's remedy this, shall we?

Our entries, in order of appearence, are:

Sane Co. with It is what it is.
Ibispi with Smile or Die
selmiak with If only I had an idea that would be clever...
Baron with It is comgings without candies

(Some titels provided by your host because our artists didn't give us any.)


As a reminder, here are the voting categories for this round:

Text: If you remove all visual elements, does the text still mean something? Is it well written, in a good style? Does it tell a story?
Shape: If you remove the language element, is it a good and interesting picture? How well is the artistic execution? This is the category for all visual elements.
Correlation: How well do text and shape fit together? Does the text add to the picture? Does the picture add to the text?

You have one vote per category and all your votes must be in by the end of 20. December.

JudasFm

For once, this was easy for me to decide :D

Text: selmiak
Shape: selmiak
Correlation: selmiak

kconan


selmiak

Text: Ibispi ... I like my own text but from the others I can hear some psycho shouting these words at me and they echo in my ear, so there you go... closely followed by harpooning a spooning sailors ;-D
Shape: Baron
Correlation: Baron

Adeel

Splendid entry by selmiak. Didn't even need to think twice about this.

Text: selmiak
Shape: selmiak
Correlation: selmiak


Ponch


Sane Co.


selmiak

Quote from: Adeel on Wed 16/12/2015 14:39:39
Splendid entry by selmiak. Didn't even need to think twice about this.

Text: selmiak
Shape: selmiak
Correlation: selmiak


*covertly hands over the secretly agreed upon bribe*

ppl, vote for baron or so, I have no idea how to host a writing competition and the silver trophy looks like a mix between a panda and a cute dog... :P

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