Author Topic: Improve the pitch for "Mamma mia!"  (Read 601 times)

Improve the pitch for "Mamma mia!"
« on: 22 Jul 2019, 03:47 »
Hi folks,

Have a look at the pitch for “Mamma mia!”.

1. What do you think of the game title?
Does it put you off in any way? (In which way does it put you off?)
Is "Mamma mia – winter ice cream mayhem" better or worse than "Mamma mia"?

2. What do you think of the screenshot below (top)?
Does it work better or worse than the one beneath it?

3. What do you think of the pitch text?
Does it get you to download the game?
Does it get you to download and play the game?
What is missing in your opinion?
What should be re-ordered or left out?

Bonus question:
4. Does the fact put you off that a game is a MAGS entry or has evolved from a MAGS entry?


« Last Edit: 24 Jul 2019, 03:29 by fernewelten »

Re: Improve the pitch for "Mamma mia!"
« Reply #1 on: 22 Jul 2019, 09:03 »
I think both titles are ok and there's nothing wrong with the pitch, it actually sells the game pretty well and makes me think it could be quite funny. But like so many AGS games, especially of the MAGS variety, the graphics are what makes me go "ehh I think I'll pass", if I can be perfectly honest (and since you're in fact asking for feedback, I hope it's taken for what it's worth, not as me trying to be mean or anything!).
« Last Edit: 22 Jul 2019, 09:28 by notarobotyet »

Buckethead

  • No m8...
    • Buckethead worked on one or more games that was nominated for an AGS Award!
Re: Improve the pitch for "Mamma mia!"
« Reply #2 on: 23 Jul 2019, 13:56 »
1. If you are going to call it Mama mia, I think people are going to think of the musical and think it's about that. Especially with the ! as the musical also had that. Since you already completed the game I think adding the subtitle helps differentiate from the musical.

2. The new screenshot is kinda busy with a lot going on it. The previous screenshot is easier on the eye with less to look at. I do like that the new one includes GUIs and the pointer, please do crop of the titlebar.

3. The text is fine as it is in my opinion. One thing that might be a little confusing is that you mention Italian swearing but the game is in English. About playing the game or not: what mostly puts me off is the graphics style of the game. It is just a bit all over the place with the gradients and the inconsistent outlines.


Re: Improve the pitch for "Mamma mia!"
« Reply #3 on: 23 Jul 2019, 15:09 »
I would put more Italian flags into it and work in some Italian landmarks if you can. To me, the Italian edge is your big sell on the game because it otherwise looks like a rather normal point and click. I hate to suggest turning the game into a mashup of Italian stereotypes, but I think it could help you differentiate the project a little bit.

Re: Improve the pitch for "Mamma mia!"
« Reply #4 on: 23 Jul 2019, 17:14 »
Many thanks for the feedback so far!

As concerns the graphics and the contents, I'll definitely keep them in mind; I'll probably be able to incorporate improvements of those into the update after the next.

I currently estimate around three dozen downloads and around twice as much views.