I am on my second reading of your piece as I did not understand the story very well the first time and I think I might have found the early-on moment where I went off-track:
"The young man put his head in his hands and leaned forward. The cheap IKEA table groaned under his weight. „Bed-sheets?“ he said.
The man opposite him stapled his fingertips onto each other slowly and nodded."
The word stapled and the position of "him" and "his" in this sentence made me imagine that the man opposite the young man was slowly stapling, as in with an office stapler, the young man's fingers together and that is why I thought the opening scene was a young man being tortured.
I think the word you were looking for may have been "steepled" and the sentence should read "The man opposite him steepled his fingers together slowly and nodded."
So, on my second read-through, I read on with the preconception that this was a torture situation out of my head:
A small comment on grammar:
"“Well,” Theodore Crain squirmed on the uncomfortable chair that had his massive form wobble over the sides." should be probably "that allowed his massive form to wobble over the sides."
And then, reading on, I was mildly entertained by the rest of the story up until the point where this happened:
"In the end, Alex just stepped forward and brushed a stray hair from Steve’s cheek. With the hand already in position, he pulled him closer. “You’re hot when you’re angry.”
As he knew he would, Steve melted into the touch. “I’m always hot.” he said and planted a kiss on Alex’s lips."
And then after that point I was fully onboard for the two characters as this felt like a really genuine moment between two young people in love with each other. It took me back to when I felt that way as a young man about the person I was in love with, to be honest.
And the flirty and dirty innuendos after that were also a trip down memory lane.
At the end of the day, a lovely little piece about two people completely in love with each other and out on an adventure together.
I also appreciated the subtle moments that hinted at the couple being a bit nervous about their same-sex relationship being a possible matter of conflict in front of the cops, as that is sure to be in the minds of anyone in that situation even in 2021, and also appreciate the fact that this did not lead anywhere bad for them, reflecting the massive leaps in acceptance we have seen over the past decade or so.
Loved it!
