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For all this time women have suffered... It is time we all unite to end women's suffrage, for it is a terrible thing!

Who's with me?

To buybrush preepwood, I apologise for calling him a smacktard.

[...]

Hope you guys can forgive me...

I did not feel offended at first, but now I don't forgive you. Nobody calls me Buybrush Preepwood, jerk; unless you were really referring to some guy called like that and not me, in which case I still need an apology so that I won't feel left out.

One word: Goosfraba...

cheesy, but entertaining: http://www.the-editing-room.com/?script=revengeofthesith

But he died...

The food was bad! The referee was paid! The ball was remote controlled! The ladies were distracting! The whole game was set up!

I use Guitar Pro, but it's not free. It's probably your best midi program choice if you are a guitarist though.

[I]

I call a couple of my real-life female friends as "bitch" and they actually seem to like it, but that's another story.

I have a few online friends that I really trust and wouldn't feel much skeptical about meeting them at all. I know that they will be different than the image I created in my head about them, but if I don't meet them I'll never know.

Oh, and one time someone called a girl and I answered. Only he was the pranker who insisted I was someone with the name Eleonora.

Mash, you do of course realize the hat is just there to disguise the fact that Zachary is a cone-head because Mr. Hyde here just impregnated some alien chick not too long ago.

Well, it's not exactly a cone, but he's still not fooling anybody.

I think the new one looks 3d even without good shading. The third "leg" makes it look flatter and will be a bigger challenge to shade while keeping the 3d-ness. Plus, it's just cuter...

This happened to me once... Behold teh llama song!!1!

This is pretty awesome, but I liked the blue trousers more.

Saving Private Peepwood:



I'm trying to plan my way out of this mandatory army service, my current plan involves the army psychologist and a little bit of strategically exaggerated truth.

It was Friday ........ "I peed in the holy water..."

I know it differently:

Four nuns died in an accident and went to heaven where they find St Peter. St Peter tells them that all they have to do to enter heaven is to confess their biggest sin and then do what they are told.

So, the first nun says "Forgive me, for I have watched an R-rated movie". St Peter says "You are forgiven, now go and wash your face with the Holy Water". She walks off, and the fourth nun starts begging St Peter to be next. St Peter refuses and says "Be patient, wait for your turn".

The second nun says "Forgive me, for I have once touched the penis of a man". St Peter says "You are forgiven, now go and wash your hands with the Holy Water".

The fourth nun begins begging again to be next and St Peter asks "Please, be patient. Why don't you just wait for your turn?". The fourth nun says "Father, please, let me drink the water before she sticks her ass in it!"


Another one:

Satan and Jesus were having an debate, and it was decided that they would have a typing competition. Anyway, they were busy typing and Satan was going very fast, whilst Jesus was just typing in a slow relaxed manner. Then suddenly, when there were a few seconds left, the Father intervened, there was a flash of lightening and all the power went off. When it came back on again, they turned on their computers, and Satan had lost everything, but Jesus still had it. Satan started screaming obscenities and asked Jesus "How did you do that?". He replies, "Jesus Saves!"

Another:

An old preacher was dying. He sent a message for his banker and his lawyer, both church members, to come to his home.

When they arrived, they were ushered up to his bedroom. As they entered the room, the preacher held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed. The preacher grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled, and stared at the ceiling. For a time, no one said anything.

Both the banker and lawyer were touched and flattered that the preacher would ask them to be with him during his final moments. They were also puzzled; the preacher had never given them any indication that he particularly liked either of them. They both remembered his many long, uncomfortable sermons about greed, covetousness, and avaricious behaviour that made them squirm in their seats.

Finally, the banker said, "Preacher, why did you ask us to come?"

The old preacher mustered up his strength and then said weakly, "Jesus died between two thieves, and that's how I want to go."

Some people have such a boring life that they want to start a rebellion just for the sake of it. I doubt if half the PETA members actually care about animals. They just need something to fight for, so their life can have a meaning.

I'd love to think that this thing is a paranormal experience, but I don't think so. Both times it happened I was lying on bed tired, but not sleeping. So I guess it was most likely sort of a "half-sleep". Like I said in another thread here a while ago, if I could read the words I could see on the ceiling and make sense out of them I could say that it was some sort of divine message directed to me, but they were moving around so fast that I couldn't.

I've had this twice so far. I wish it happened more often, it's totally awesome

I look so gay

When girls dump me I just act like a jerk for a few months by trying to have as minimal contact as possible, gradually going to no contact at all. Then when I 101% get over the break-up, I give a call or send an email or something, saying that I wonder how they're doing etc. And we just start being friends again, no more feelings or bitter grudges. I think.

Actually, that only worked twice, but it still did. Not that I have enough experience points for it to happen more than twice, but that's another story.