King Simulator 2013

[Ghost]

> announce a Teh Tabby Has A Smiley For Everything Day.

Our first kingly holiday!

[Adeel]

Everyone: Please thank selmiak because he's the person who reminded WHAM about dancing and hence we got to see imagine them dancing!

Awesome! Too bad this is not animated

I *can* imagine them doing a Riverdance number
           

> Grant next audience

+1

  +1

+1

[WHAM]

"Next!" -you call out, having gotten used to the routine.

An old man, his head bald and his beard thick, approaches the throne. He wears a faded green traveller's robe and around his neck is a chain of links crafted of many metals.



"My King, I am HIRSCHEL, THE WIZENED the call me. For decades I have offered my services to those in need and to those who sought it, and in those years I have accumulated a wealth of knowledge in the matter of plants, herbs and minerals of the earth. Now I seek a place to spend the rest of my years, a place where I may settle down and still be of use. Would you offer me such a place? I ask for no pay, just that I have a place to sleep and work and eat."

[Radiant]

Is he the very model of a modern major general?

[selmiak]

for my tastes he doesn't look cliche enough

[cat]

> Kindly accept the offer and assign him as ROYAL GARDENER. Order Construed to build a fence in the ROYAL GARDEN so Annabelle doesn't eat our precious herbs.

[NightHawk]

> Kindly accept the offer and assign him as ROYAL GARDENER. Order Construed to build a fence in the ROYAL GARDEN so Annabelle doesn't eat our precious herbs.

+1

[Tibatonk]

No pay? Get the commie out of here!

[Adeel]

Even though he is not asking for payment, we as king should be kind and/or noble enough to ask the reason. So, I'll slightly modify cat's command (if she doesn't mind):

> Kindly accept the offer and assign him as ROYAL GARDENER. Order Construed to build a fence in the ROYAL GARDEN so Annabelle doesn't eat our precious herbs. Also, ask Hirschel: 'Why is he not asking for any payment at all'?

Since Hirschel looks like a wise and probably calm, old man. We can benefit from his wise advices too.

[Crimson Wizard]

I ask for no pay, just that I have a place to sleep and work and eat.

Works for food? True C++ programme... wait...

[Ryan Timothy B]

Don't hire him just yet. Ask him some questions first.

> Ask the man why he seeks no pay in return for his services, and then ask about his past and people he's worked for. And ask what he can do with herbs and potions.

[WHAM]

"Very well, Hirschel. I hereby appoint you the ROYAL GARDENER. You will have a quarter set up for you within the castle and you will have free reign over the roayl garden. I will have the garden segmented by fences to allow you to divide the area as needed and to ensure the ROYAL PRIZE COW does not hinder your work."



The old man bows as deep as his crooked back allows him.

"Thank you, Kind King. I will serve you 'till the end of my days, Gods willing."



You call for the JESTER to guide the new ROYAL GARDENER to some free quarters in the castle, and instruct him to relay your request for some fences in the royal garden to the head of the builder's guild; CONSTRUED.

The JESTER gladly obliges and is soon on his way.
The hooded silhouette of your next audience awaits at the door of the throne room

[Ryan Timothy B]

The hooded silhouette of your next audience awaits at the door of the throne room

Hmm. I believe the last person on our list left is the TRAVELLING ARTISAN, unless this isn't the artisan.

a TRAVELLING MERCHANT from the south wishes to offer his finest wares and services to the KING
SIR KEVIN OF AXEMONT and his knights wish to offer their services to the KING
a LOST WARRIOR seeks assistance from the KING
BARON MONOCLE, an envoy of a pirate clan from the Western sea, seeks an audience with the KING
HIRSCHEL THE WIZENED offers his skills as a HERBALIST to the KING
ROBINA THE RANGER and her archers seek to offer their services to the KING
a TRAVELLING ARTISAN seeks to offer her finest crafts and services to the KING

It sounds a little eerie. Like we should be requesting more guards before we let this person in. I suggest this:

> COMMAND the guards in your presence to stand alert but don't look too threatening, then SUMMON the next AUDIENCE

[Radiant]

> Practice juggling.

[Adeel]

> Commit suicide because of the fear of Travelling Artisan.

[WHAM]

> Write a note reading: "I hate my life", give it to Jester and commit suicide.

> Commit suicide because of the fear of Travelling Artisan.

Is that a deathwish I sense there?

[Ghost]

> Commit suicide because of the fear of Travelling Artisan.

+1, but quicksave first so that we can undo the move for the lulz.

[cat]

> COMMAND the guards in your presence to stand alert but don't look too threatening, then SUMMON the next AUDIENCE

+1

[Adeel]

Is that a deathwish I sense there?

Yes!

Spoiler

Actually, I want him to live. It's just that whenever I play any game, I often deliberately make the protagonist die So, the same ol' habbit is showing its colour here.

[close]

[WHAM]

Just keep in mind that this is a one-shot game. No saves, no loads, no retries. If the King dies and does not have a heir of some sort, the game ends outright.