Poll

Which of the contributions listed below do you think makes the best game pitch?

1
2 (8%)
2
1 (4%)
3
1 (4%)
4
2 (8%)
5
7 (28%)
6
3 (12%)
7
1 (4%)
8
1 (4%)
9
6 (24%)
10
1 (4%)

Total Members Voted: 25

Voting closed: 12 May 2018, 11:09

Author Topic: Game pitch competition  (Read 3380 times)

Andail

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Game pitch competition
« on: 22 Apr 2018, 18:11 »
Time's up for this round, use the poll to help decide a winner!

Are you an ideas kind of person?

Have so many great game ideas that you likely won't ever use all of them?

You now have the opportunity to prepare the perfect elevator pitch, and see if it's as good as you've always thought!

The Rules
  • Write a great game pitch in roughly 80 words.
  • The pitch should fit a very loose description of "adventure game" (this genre is rather broad these days).
  • Send it to me via PM.
  • The entries will then be published here anonymously, and we'll vote for the winner.
  • The deadline is two weeks from now, meaning I'll close the activity on Sunday 6th.

As a fun side activity, after the competition is over, people may guess who wrote each entry :)

You can post here for questions or comments, but the actual pitch should only be sent to me via PM.

Good luck!

Behold, the great contributions to this competition:

#1
Welcome in Grand’Teslan

Gyada walks amnesiac in the streets wearing a straightjacket.
Did she escape from an asylum?
She can open every locks, except the ones on herself.
Is she a burglar?
She can’t rest.
Nightmares of the city named Grand’Teslan that cry blood harms his mind.
But seems too real.
What secrets hide his freakish inhabitants? Why Gyada is bound to this gory place?
Help Gyada to solve the mysteries of Grand’Teslan, and free herself… and his soul!

#2
Twin Peaks in Oxbridge setting, as an adventure/life-sim:

During university entrance interviews at Clarendon College, one of your fellow candidates vanishes without trace. But when you return for your first term, you discover a clue…

To investigate the disappearance you must delve into the many intrigues and mysteries of Clarendon (from secret societies to academic vendettas to designer drug rings), while also attending lectures and tutorials, finding friendship and romance, and taking part in student activities (drama, sports, parties…) and college traditions.

#3
☼‡§Glory Master!§‡☼

This game is like FF RPG FPS adventure inland of Overlandia, where wicket shadow wizards The Borgias have conquest.  There is being teh Battle for points that get you moawr power, and spellz for teh vanquishment of arch mages.  U r God Beast, a man of handsome musculer kharisma.  U saving teh objectified Sexy Ladys with cunning & brutality.  Theirs fellow beta heroes who follow in ur cause, and u spend moste ur time a loan in there manly company.  Teh game has a serius, melancholy town.

#4
A prank at school ends up with jimmmy dying and is sent to the pearly gates. There's no red carpet for him there so he immediately head for the "Hell-evator" with a "We both know how this will play out so I'll just be on my way" Saint Peter stops him and thinks for a while and decides that Jimmy should stay in heaven because he would probably enjoy hell with its sinful ways. So the main objective is to piss off GOD so much that he sends you back to earth.

#5
Ithaca's Quest

Back in 15th century at Florence, a teenager called Antonio always loved the arts, but his destiny was to be a pizza baker, as his family tradition did already for over 400 years. After the unexpected death of his father, Antonio gains the inheritance money and he decide to direct a theatrical production of the first printed Homer's Odyssey. Now Antonio must find and convince the villagers to be actors, dancers, painters, and musicians with the magic of solve puzzling.

#6
Adam is an ant (a worker ant, to be precise) with a problem – while all the others are hard at work like a proverbial… well, ant – he just wants to lounge around playing pointandclick games.  However when the termites overwhelm the soldier ants, only his ingenuity - honed by his experience of playing adventure games - can save the colony.  Using only what he can find in the natural surroundings, Adam must make a machine capable of defeating the termites – The Termitinator!

#7
A story about a guy who is inexplicably immortal.
The game would be a bit like one of Telltale's games, what with the constant decision making. But the story would be about someone from the Victorian era who for some unexplained reason, becomes immortal. The game would take place over a large period of time. At first he won't know he's immortal, but then people realise he isn't ageing, and then he watches his family die of old age. It fast forwards to the modern day, where he has become a celebrity as an undying man, and an oddity that scientists can't figure out, but that people generally leave alone, and we get a nice little love story that seems to end the game, but then it fast forwards again into the future, where there's a nuclear war and everyone except him is killed. Then it fast forwards into the future again, humans are long since gone, all animals have long since changed or evolved, and he's still alive, completely and utterly depressed. Finally it fast forwards again, Earth is a barren rock, and the sun is getting bigger. He gets enveloped by a supernova and then into a black hole, but he can still think because he’s still alive somehow. And so he thinks to himself about how the thought of an afterlife is the worst thing he can imagine, because having lived for an eternity, he hates the thought that so many other people want what he considers to the worst fate imaginable.

#8
A Scythian warrior wishing to prove herself ends up travelling along the silk road alongside an exiled Greek scholar in the quest for a relic of tremendous importance,
the Ur-shanabi, the plant Gilgamesh himself  searched for, which is said to grant immortality. Together they will fight bandits, explore lost tombs and
visit fabled cities such as Babylonia and Persepolis on an epic journey that will make them both question everything about their beliefs and perceptions of the world.

#9
One of the world's biggest game creators has gone missing. A boy thinks that there are clues hidden in his games that will help solve the mystery, and is set on solving it. The game would switch between playing the games to look for clues and investigating the real world. All the while, the main character will have to deal with run-ins with the police as he trespasses to investigate areas, and with his troubled home life, living with his mom who just went through a divorce.

#10
Omniball

In Lewis Candon's world, Luckmeters are used to rank society from 'A' to 'F' according to a person's innate luck. The A-Grades tend to be CEOs and lawyers. On the opposite end is Lewis, an unemployed F-Grade about to take a job where society has deemed he can work safely -- the Omniball lottery.

On the morning of his first day, fellow F-Grade, Brad Pearson, approaches Lewis with a potentially life-changing idea. They're going to rig the lottery.
« Last Edit: 27 May 2018, 18:30 by Andail »

Stupot

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #1 on: 22 Apr 2018, 23:38 »
Cool idea. My thinking cap is now on.

Mandle

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #2 on: 23 Apr 2018, 01:04 »
Great idea for a contest, and could actually encourage people to take their pitches and do something with them, even if that something is frame it and hang it in their bathroom.

Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #3 on: 23 Apr 2018, 09:11 »

We have to pitch a realesed/in developing game or even an imaginary one ("Lara Croft meets James Bond in Monkey Island")?

_

Andail

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #4 on: 23 Apr 2018, 09:39 »

We have to pitch a realesed/in developing game or even an imaginary one ("Lara Croft meets James Bond in Monkey Island")?

_

An imaginary one. An idea that only exists in your brain so far.

CaptainD

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #5 on: 23 Apr 2018, 11:33 »
Hmm... I always have far more game ideas than will ever possibly see the light of day, but right now my mind's gone completely blank! (roll)

Danvzare

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #6 on: 23 Apr 2018, 11:54 »
Sounds brilliant. :-D
Would it be ok to send multiple pitches?

Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #7 on: 23 Apr 2018, 16:29 »
What a fun idea, I just sent one of my many ideas for adventure games in a PM.

Andail

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #8 on: 26 Apr 2018, 06:23 »
Sounds brilliant. :-D
Would it be ok to send multiple pitches?

You can send in multiple pitches, and I'll pick the best one :) This is a competition after all, so having more than one entry seems a bit unfair...

Andail

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #9 on: 29 Apr 2018, 15:31 »
Alright, a reminder that it's one week left.

I've already got 7 contributions, so the competition is fierce!

Andail

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #10 on: 07 May 2018, 11:06 »
Behold, the great contributions to this competition:

#1
Welcome in Grand’Teslan

Gyada walks amnesiac in the streets wearing a straightjacket.
Did she escape from an asylum?
She can open every locks, except the ones on herself.
Is she a burglar?
She can’t rest.
Nightmares of the city named Grand’Teslan that cry blood harms his mind.
But seems too real.
What secrets hide his freakish inhabitants? Why Gyada is bound to this gory place?
Help Gyada to solve the mysteries of Grand’Teslan, and free herself… and his soul!

#2
Twin Peaks in Oxbridge setting, as an adventure/life-sim:

During university entrance interviews at Clarendon College, one of your fellow candidates vanishes without trace. But when you return for your first term, you discover a clue…

To investigate the disappearance you must delve into the many intrigues and mysteries of Clarendon (from secret societies to academic vendettas to designer drug rings), while also attending lectures and tutorials, finding friendship and romance, and taking part in student activities (drama, sports, parties…) and college traditions.

#3
☼‡§Glory Master!§‡☼

This game is like FF RPG FPS adventure inland of Overlandia, where wicket shadow wizards The Borgias have conquest.  There is being teh Battle for points that get you moawr power, and spellz for teh vanquishment of arch mages.  U r God Beast, a man of handsome musculer kharisma.  U saving teh objectified Sexy Ladys with cunning & brutality.  Theirs fellow beta heroes who follow in ur cause, and u spend moste ur time a loan in there manly company.  Teh game has a serius, melancholy town.

#4
A prank at school ends up with jimmmy dying and is sent to the pearly gates. There's no red carpet for him there so he immediately head for the "Hell-evator" with a "We both know how this will play out so I'll just be on my way" Saint Peter stops him and thinks for a while and decides that Jimmy should stay in heaven because he would probably enjoy hell with its sinful ways. So the main objective is to piss off GOD so much that he sends you back to earth.

#5
Ithaca's Quest

Back in 15th century at Florence, a teenager called Antonio always loved the arts, but his destiny was to be a pizza baker, as his family tradition did already for over 400 years. After the unexpected death of his father, Antonio gains the inheritance money and he decide to direct a theatrical production of the first printed Homer's Odyssey. Now Antonio must find and convince the villagers to be actors, dancers, painters, and musicians with the magic of solve puzzling.

#6
Adam is an ant (a worker ant, to be precise) with a problem – while all the others are hard at work like a proverbial… well, ant – he just wants to lounge around playing pointandclick games.  However when the termites overwhelm the soldier ants, only his ingenuity - honed by his experience of playing adventure games - can save the colony.  Using only what he can find in the natural surroundings, Adam must make a machine capable of defeating the termites – The Termitinator!

#7
A story about a guy who is inexplicably immortal.
The game would be a bit like one of Telltale's games, what with the constant decision making. But the story would be about someone from the Victorian era who for some unexplained reason, becomes immortal. The game would take place over a large period of time. At first he won't know he's immortal, but then people realise he isn't ageing, and then he watches his family die of old age. It fast forwards to the modern day, where he has become a celebrity as an undying man, and an oddity that scientists can't figure out, but that people generally leave alone, and we get a nice little love story that seems to end the game, but then it fast forwards again into the future, where there's a nuclear war and everyone except him is killed. Then it fast forwards into the future again, humans are long since gone, all animals have long since changed or evolved, and he's still alive, completely and utterly depressed. Finally it fast forwards again, Earth is a barren rock, and the sun is getting bigger. He gets enveloped by a supernova and then into a black hole, but he can still think because he’s still alive somehow. And so he thinks to himself about how the thought of an afterlife is the worst thing he can imagine, because having lived for an eternity, he hates the thought that so many other people want what he considers to the worst fate imaginable.

#8
A Scythian warrior wishing to prove herself ends up travelling along the silk road alongside an exiled Greek scholar in the quest for a relic of tremendous importance,
the Ur-shanabi, the plant Gilgamesh himself  searched for, which is said to grant immortality. Together they will fight bandits, explore lost tombs and
visit fabled cities such as Babylonia and Persepolis on an epic journey that will make them both question everything about their beliefs and perceptions of the world.

#9
One of the world's biggest game creators has gone missing. A boy thinks that there are clues hidden in his games that will help solve the mystery, and is set on solving it. The game would switch between playing the games to look for clues and investigating the real world. All the while, the main character will have to deal with run-ins with the police as he trespasses to investigate areas, and with his troubled home life, living with his mom who just went through a divorce.

#10
Omniball

In Lewis Candon's world, Luckmeters are used to rank society from 'A' to 'F' according to a person's innate luck. The A-Grades tend to be CEOs and lawyers. On the opposite end is Lewis, an unemployed F-Grade about to take a job where society has deemed he can work safely -- the Omniball lottery.

On the morning of his first day, fellow F-Grade, Brad Pearson, approaches Lewis with a potentially life-changing idea. They're going to rig the lottery.

Gurok

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #11 on: 07 May 2018, 13:01 »
I voted for #6, but I might as well include my thoughts on some of the others.

1st. #6 - I'm a sucker for wordplay. This was the most entertaining pitch to read. I like the idea of playing as an ant. I think the adventure gamer backstory could work well if it avoids in-jokes.
2nd. #9 - I actually think there are too few games about game makers. We have movies about film makers, books about writers. It's an aspirational career, so there should be more. The setting has all the good features of an 80s kids film. Would be happy to play this.
3rd. #2 Twin Peaks in Oxbridge setting - Definitely up my alley, setting-wise. Gameplay might be too similar to Persona, but I think there is room for more than one game like that.

I think I know who submitted #4.

These were really fun to read. I'd like to enter in the next one (if there is a next one).
« Last Edit: 07 May 2018, 13:08 by Gurok »

Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #12 on: 07 May 2018, 13:08 »
No direction on voting, so I'll do the usual 1st, 2nd, 3rd.
Did you somehow miss the poll and the big red text in the first post that tells you to use the poll? ;-D

Edit: Well, seems you noticed it and edited accordingly.

Gurok

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #13 on: 07 May 2018, 13:08 »
No direction on voting, so I'll do the usual 1st, 2nd, 3rd.
Did you somehow miss the poll and the big red text in the first post that tells you to use the poll? ;-D

It wasn't there when I replied. :D

Cassiebsg

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #14 on: 07 May 2018, 17:13 »
To be honest, I had no idea how to vote... since there's no info on the entry page... and I only read the last not read post... (roll)
I voted #4, since it made me laugh and I enjoy the "lets piss off GOD!" for a change. (laugh)

But there's a bunch more I would love to play. (nod)
There are those who believe that life here began out there...

cat

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #15 on: 07 May 2018, 20:29 »
I voted for #5. This seems so joyful with nice puzzles and lots of interactions with other people.
#6 could also be fun.

#2 would be great if it wasn't for the life-sim part.
#4 could be fun if done well, but chances are that such a character would also piss of the player, not only god.

Snarky

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #16 on: 08 May 2018, 07:23 »
My vote was also for #5 (pizza baker wants to be theater producer). Out of all the entries this is the one where I feel I have a clear idea of how it would play, and "recruit a team through puzzle solving" is a solid, proven AG structure.

#8 (quest for Ur-shanabi) is my runner-up. The pitch really conveys enthusiasm for the subject matter, which makes me interested in playing it, and I like a good mythological quest. My main concern is that the gameplay remains pretty vague (it almost sounds more like an RPG or action-adventure, and I'm not even sure whether I'm playing as the warrior, the scholar, or both), and " will make them both question everything about their beliefs and perceptions of the world" is too movietrailery for my tastes.

In third place I'll pick #4 (pissing off God). It'd be a fun premise for a short game, like a MAGS or something. Cat's concern sounds like the danger of what Blondbraid recently called the "Unlovable Rogue" archetype (i.e. asshole protagonist), though I think explicitly framing the character as a bad person helps mitigate it.

In general, I feel that a lot of the entries would have benefited from giving a better idea of the content and gameplay of the game, rather than just teasing the story. Like, #10 (rig the lottery) is a good setup, but I have no idea of what the game actually consists of. Also, while there's a lot to like in #6 (adventure gamer ant) and #9 (Ready Adventure-Player One), I tend to be skeptical of adventure games where the main character is an adventure gamer: it's such a go-to premise in the indie/amateur community, and the self-referentiality gets a bit tiresome for me. I'm clearly out of step with other voters on that point, though.
« Last Edit: 08 May 2018, 07:33 by Snarky »

Sinitrena

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #17 on: 08 May 2018, 11:50 »
I voted for #1 with 6 and 8 as close runner-ups. I like the mystery presented in 1 even though it tells little of the story or potential game play.

#7 is an interesting read. It's a fascinating topic and philosophical problem but I doubt it would work as a game. Time-jumps are just not a good game mechanic, even for games released in chapters. That's a concept for a book, not a game.
« Last Edit: 08 May 2018, 11:54 by Sinitrena »

Danvzare

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Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #18 on: 08 May 2018, 12:54 »
1st: 6   Adam is an ant
2nd: 2   Twin Peaks in Oxbridge
3rd: 10  Omniball


After all of the voting is done. Could you release ALL of the pitches.
I would love to read everything everyone came up with :-D

Re: Game pitch competition
« Reply #19 on: 08 May 2018, 22:09 »
I'd love to see #5 and #6 being made into a game ;-D