I'd really appreciate comments, suggestions and advice on my character. (see below)
Thank you!
Edit 1: See reply #6
Edit 2 (11-8-04): See reply #11
Edit 3 (11-9-04): See reply #17
Edit 4 (11-15-04): See reply #25
Edit 5 (11-16-04): See reply #26
--Erwin
Change?
Definetly shoes & standing pose: He's not supported by his feet! His pose makes me think that soon the wind will blow him over.
Try a little more powerful stance.
Otherwise, hi-res look of the character looks... great!
Just a few minor things (i love your work, so no worries ;) )
- the fingers on his left hand looks like small sausages
- inside his right hand (between the fingers and the thumb) there's a dark patch of skin i can quite figure out what is.
- his right leg should be rotated towards the screen. as InCreator said, his feet doesn't support him.
- the outlines on his face are much sharper than the outlines on the rest of his body.
- his neck seems too long for his body. maybe shorten it or lenghten his legs or a bit of both? (this is not a critique, just a thought)
As I think I have said before: Great work! :)
I love this charactor. The style is great!
I thought Brett looked like he was leaning forward too much so I messed with his legs a bit by drawing them straighter under his torso;
(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/brettgo.PNG)(quick eddit and the shoes are still not right)
I thought the rest of his body looked cool. I think you should keep his neck long and his legs short, I think its just in with the style.
It might help if you thicken the heels of his shoes a tad so that they don't look so much like socks.
Great character, I just wonder where the zipper is on his shirt
(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/bt-newego2.gif)
Changed his shoes, though I'm still not satisfied. Also changed his left hand.
--Erwin
the shoes are way better.... you could easily get away with them in-game now, but there is room for improvement :) Maybe you should make them a tad bigger again?
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v458/evil1359/erwin_shoes.png
Meh, mine turned out small but you get the point.
There's something about his shoulders that looks like he's holding in some military postion. Really looks unnatural fix that.
Since it's quite masterful (and also difficult to draw) sprite, I didn't edit it, just tried to fix the body geometry with some guidelines.
* head back about 5-15 pixels
* one shoe looking at the "camera", green arrows showÃ, the direction shoe is facing at
* feet supporting now
* upper body more relaxed
* purple "X"s show place where normally fingertips should reach, but since you're going for cartoony look, it isn't very important
(http://www.terran-x.com/increator/erwin_pose.PNG)
Great edit, though it does make the character look a bit of a 'tough guy', while he's supposed to be a little geeky and insecure.
This is my newest version based on your, and other people's, suggestions:
(http://erbserv.cjb.net/public/images/bt-brettagain.gif)
More suggestions, advice and critique are very welcome.
Thanks!
--Erwin
Maybe the character should have a bit more heel (squared)? The shoe looks sort've flaccid at the moment. Bulkier shoes often look good. I can sketch it if you like.
His shoulders still look too stiff and unnatural you should use the arms InCreator suggested!
Here's my take:
(http://www.strazer.net/ags/edit_brett.gif)
I like Strazer's
WOW thats a great edit, you shoould go with strazer edit
Thanks Strazer, that's an awesome edit and exactly the pose I had in mind.
I've based my new character on this edit. As you can see, I made his legs a little longer and changed the angle a bit. Everything else is more or less the same. I also created a front view:
(http://erbserv.cjb.net/public/images/bt-brettagain3.gif)
What do you think of the front view? Does it work?
--Erwin
Looks real good . wish I could do that .. hides head in shame
hey erwin... I love your art!
the new sideview rocks! strazer did a nice job....
some crits for the front view:
in his front view he looks much fatter then in the sideview, try making him a little less fat :).
then his hands, it looks like he has his hands behind his butt a little. I think the fingers should be visible in front of his pants (hard to explain) :P.
I also would make his head a little less pumped up. but that's personal I think.
For the rist I think it's awesome!
Maybe you could add a shoe lases? Other than that its amazing. 8)
Quote from: N3TGraph on Wed 10/11/2004 09:58:13
hey erwin... I love your art!
the new sideview rocks! strazer did a nice job....
some crits for the front view:
in his front view he looks much fatter then in the sideview, try making him a little less fat :).
then his hands, it looks like he has his hands behind his butt a little. I think the fingers should be visible in front of his pants (hard to explain) :P.
I also would make his head a little less pumped up. but that's personal I think.
For the rist I think it's awesome!
Yeah, I have to work on it some more. The sideview has a nice bended line going on, if you know what I mean. I'll have to bring that back in the front view too.
--Erwin
Like the character, very lovable :).
The sideview is really great, but he does look alittle fat in front view.
Here is (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v124/Darkster/try.bmp) my own humble edit, don't know if you can use it to anything.
And here's my version:
(http://www.strazer.net/ags/edit_brett_front.gif)
Side view:
As you can see, I shortened the mouth a bit, I thought it's a bit too extreme, but I guess that's just your style.
What I think is important is that you round the back of the head to imply the round cheeks as seen in the front view.
Front view:
While painting, once in a while you have to make sure everything lines up properly. Notice the jacket, face etc.
I changed the hair and face around a bit too, so it fits with the side view better.
I like the character a lot and I look forward to your game.
It reminds me of the standing pose Fry from Futurama would have. Fun!
(http://erbserv.cjb.net/public/images/bt-brettagain4.gif)
I brought Brett's arms to the front, as in Strazer's (once again exellent) example. I also used Strazer's hands, because I really like them. I also edited other parts of his body. I didn't want him too look too symetrical, as you can see from his jacket. I'm quite fond of Brett's face, so I didn't change it.
I'm currently working on the back-pose.
Thanks for the comments and edits. I really appreciate it!
--Erwin
Created a back-view:
(http://erbserv.cjb.net/public/images/bt-brettagain5.gif)
What do you think about the shoes and the hood?
--Erwin
The hood should have a visible opening at the top and the tips of the shoes are too far up. Otherwise it's great! Love the hands.