(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/anim2.gif)
Well, I've been a bit on the lazy side when it comes to making graphics lately, but now I've pulled myself together and slapped this little baby up for Trailing Blood. It's supposed to be an short cutscene for the beginning of Day 2, alá GK1, (Like I needed to even mention that...) and I think it's pretty nice so far.
But I also think I've been staring myself blind at it, and therefore I thought I'd post it here to hear if anyone's got any suggestions, critics or similar?
- Also, the original version of the girl was made by me, but edited by Loominous, just so that you know. I hope you don't mind me using your edited version of it - If that were to be the case, just tell me, man!
wow that's cool, really freaky stuff, the only thing i could say is that her hair could be detailled a little more. Good job :)
Glad to hear that you like it. :)
Hm, yeah, I suppose I could work a bit more on the hair. Maybe make it a bit brighter?
The only thing that stands out to me is her eyes. When they 'black out', the red seems TOO red, like the pupils are just floating. Hopefully this:
http://www.geocities.com/whoismonkey/trail.png
will explain better that I can.
That looks really sweet, but I wonder if the effect wouldn't be even creepier if you darkened the whole scene when her eyes turn red, ending with something like this:
(http://www.agagames.com/ghormak/creep.gif)
Or maybe something blue-ish?
(http://www.agagames.com/ghormak/creep2.gif)
Maybe not at all what you had in mind, it's just a suggestion.
I'm with Ghorm on that one..
Also.. When the "DAY 2" writes itself, there should be a more fluid "stroke" of the letters.. Right now they just look like they're appearing out of thin air.
quick question how do u put a cutscene like that in ags, do u import each frame seperatly as a sprite, or do u import the whole animation as 1 and what program did u use to make that? :)
Did I ever happen to mention that I hate you and your animation skills, Rincewind?
because I do!
*runs away in jealous turmoil*
the right eye seems to move to the left further then the left one does, and when she first opens her eyes, the red pupils arnt in the same postion as the black ones were thats the only thing i can see wrong with it oh and when i say left and right i mean my left and right not hers....
Yay - Nice to see so many replies!
Ashen:
Yeah, you have a point there, but I want them to stand out a bit, so I made the red very bright on purpose... :)
But thanks anyway!
Ghormak:
I had thoughts about that idea for a while, but you just convinced me to do it! :D I'll try to do a "fade-to-black"-ending in the last frame...
The blue one is also really creepy, though!
LGM:
Aye, that's true - I had some troubles getting that to look good... I could try to do it more like strokes with a brush, if that's what you mean? Like someone's painting with blood.
Smokealot:
I was thinking of doing it as a sprite in the game - Importing frame by frame.
'bout the eye-movement: True - I'll see if I can fix that...
Peter Thomas:
No, I can't say you've done that before... But you sure have now... ;)
Ok, here's the updated version:
(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/anim3.gif)
Better/worse?
The darkening is good, but perhaps keep the eyes bright red as the rest of the scene fades away (like in Ghormak's example)?
I rarely give critical advice, because frankly, I'm unqualified, but I think the pupils move a little too far to the left (our left, not hers)--if they were just a little more to the right, they would really seem to be staring directly at us. Especially the left pupil. Pull it back just a bit.
Also, could you try Ghormak's idea, but instead of doing a fade at the end of the pic, fade her to a darker, more sinister shade while her eyes are closed, and then open them, red. This would just be an experiment, of course, but it probably looks best if the eyes are visible last. You could then do a fade or any other kind of cut to move to the next scene.
Finally, I think this new version lingers a bit overly long on the white eye by a frame or two before the eye closes, and a bit two long on the fade to black eyes after the eyes open, unless it's not a frame issue but a slowed down image, in which case, it just needs to run a little faster overall. You might consider having the eyes open black, though it may not work.
Otherwise, this creates the exact desired effect. It's well done!
QuoteAlso, could you try Ghormak's idea, but instead of doing a fade at the end of the pic, fade her to a darker, more sinister shade while her eyes are closed, and then open them, red. This would just be an experiment, of course, but it probably looks best if the eyes are visible last. You could then do a fade or any other kind of cut to move to the next scene.
That was what I had in mind, actually. Maybe I should have been more clear. :)
The text looks great in the new version. Nice work.
http://img29.photobucket.com/albums/v86/Haddas/Other/bloodanimation.gif
Quick edit of the end. moved eyes 2 pixels to the left.
Bspeers, I'm glad you chose to critisize, I think you did a good job of explaining some of the points... And as I said, I'll try to use Ghormaks idea as he meant it in the first place... Hehe.
And Haddas, that's a great edit! I think I'll try to acheive something like that... I really, really like it. :)
* Feels proud of himself
Ok, I managed to pull another edit together... I still feel there's something that's not right, though... Maybe add another eye-wink in the end?
(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/anim4.gif)
Really like it rince, yeh a little wink at the end would be great, just before both eyes close have her wink. It would give it that "sexy gothic" feel, seductive but also sinister.
-OSC
Glad to hear it, OSC... :)
I don't think I'll have her wink with just one eye, though - It would probabaly wreck a bit of the athmosphere if she flirted with the gamer, even though I do like the "Sexy Gothic"-feel... ;) Harhar.
- Tiny, tiny update... Added another blink in the end, as I said.
(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/anim5.gif)
I think I'm pretty close to what I want now.
Might even settle for this version if someone hasn't got any more critics? :)
hmm. i would either say to not have the second blink, but since you like it, then i would now say to keep the day 2 part on screen until the blinking is done. maybe just a try?
One thing, I kinda feel like the first time the red eyes close, it's the end, maybe if this one was a quick blink, and then a short pause, and then then close...
Umm, more clearly:
....close white eyes
open black eyes with red pupils while fading to black simultaneously(sp?)
wait ~1 second
blink
wait ~2 seonds
close eyes
One more crit: I thought the last letters looked better themselves, but these are animated better. Maybe they should be thicker/more like a brushstroke?
How many frames is this btw? I'd imagine the words would take long... How did you get them to write so smoothly?
Anyway, great job with this cutcene! I imagine it'll be the same each day? This actually inspired to maybe have something similar to keep track of days...
P.s. About the hair, maybe it'd look better if the highlight was a bit brighter? Her shirt is a bit too flat too, maybe. Shouldn't part of the breasts be visible yet? I am nitpicking now..
Well, quite a lot of critic, but this deserves to be perfected completely.
:)
Edit/Modify :D: Yes, I agree with Scummbudy now too. The day 2 should maybe stay on always, for consistency or somthing.. Or not.. It's just that there is still a leftover of it anyway (very dark red), so if this were a bit lighter it'd work better imo. Not too much
difference though ;).
Also, this absolutely needs sounds, though I'm sure you already know this. :)
I really like it, but I'd go even further with the scrawling of 'day 2' to really give the impression that it is being drawn in blood. At the moment it's still 'cutting down' on the 'A' and 'Y' more than being scrawled.
Some 'fingernails across blackboard' sound effects would be great there too to add malice/menace. :o
This might just be the gifs fault, but the fade-to-black seems a bit quick to me.
Also, if it were up to me, I'd lose both blinks at the end. Before the eyes go red, they're open for about twice as long with out a blink, so it looks a little wierd - to me at least - to have the 'demonic' version blink so quickly. Then again, maybe this is also to do with the speed.
(only browsed the previous posts so apologies if I'm repeating).
The one thing that really jars for me is that the D is written, as it should be, but the A and Y wipe down. Why not have the A and Y written properly too? The A: a line going up, then down, followed by the dash. The Y: first the two top bits, then the line at the bottom. It would look much better, I think.
Thanks again for all the replies! I appreciate it!
Scummbuddy:
Yeah , it may be worth a try. I'll edit it and keep "Day 2" to see how it looks...
Ginny:
I think I get what you mean - I'm getting a bit confused from all suggestions here, but I'll mess around with it and see if I can incorporate most of your suggestions... Hehe... :)
You may be right about the letters, they could perhaps be a bit thicker.
Widdlywiddly & James Kay:
Aye, it was pure laziness from myside that caused that one. I'll fix the A/Y's.
Ashen:
I think that's just me, setting the speed too high... :)
Wow, I'm really impressed with the latest version of that cutscene! I love the way the eyes slowly blink out. Kind of reminiscent of the Chesire Cat's smile. With the right music, that scene could be downright powerful.
My only critique is that it looks like she is smiling, and I think that might be a bit inconsistent with the mood you are trying to portray.
Ok, bump bump - Update again!
(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/anim6.gif)
I tried to use most of the suggestions I got, such as crossfading between the closing of her eyes and the "fade-to-black", keeping the letters and her eyes the same colour, and doing a better version of the letters being scribbled down, and some other small things... :)
Big Brother:
Glad to hear so... :)
But I think her smile gives the whole thing a rather morbid touch - She's smiling, even as her eyes are bleeding and turning black... Heh...
And I like that...
And also, I forgot to answer Ginny's question before:
It's currently 71 frames all in all right now...
I like when her face totally fades out.
Idea (with sounds):
1. Eyes go white and bleed
2. Closes eyes while screen darkens out.
3. Three increasing heartbeats
4. Scream while red eyes open very rapidly
5. Eyes stay open 3 seconds. Calm heartbeat in reverse
6. Eyes close and another few reversed heartbeats.
P.S I couldn't send the email to you. It got returned :P, I have the sounds though
I think it's much better, now, and something I would call an end product!
Well done, now it looks brilliant.
For sound I would have freaky music the hole time, and then when she opens her eyes and their red, suddenly going BOOM, and then exiting as quickly....
Just my two cents...
I love this new version! And wow, 71 frames, that's a lot of work!
I like Haddas' sounds idea, but I think there is something slightly dofferent on the edge of my eardrum :D. The tone is the same though, the surprise of the eyes opening red, combined with fear, etc.
Suggestions still:
1) Maybe, like Haddas said, the eyes should only open up red after fade out is over? It'd make the event seem more dramatic and sudden, plus watching this repeatedly really makes it seem sometimes like it fades out and then becomes brighteer suddenly, which it doesn't, it's just an effect of the eyes being opened simultaneously I think.
2) I think the fading out should go just a bit further, being a little darker at the end. Maybe not. :P
3) The shine on her hair seems strange, a bit, maybe it should be brighter or slightly differently shaped (though I think the shape will look better when brighter too). Maybe I'm wrong though, I dunno much about hairshine.
4) The Background of the cutscene is pretty close in color to the haircolor. Maybe it should be pitch black? Thst way it's just her head that's fading out, more focus on her too.
5) Once again, I could be wrong, but shouldn't there be some shade on her shirt? Either part of the breasts being visible or I dunno... Maybe I'm just bugged ever so slightly by the flat colour.
Lastly, I'll whip up something in M$Pain to explain what I meant for the blood, but I think it'll be too much work to redo it... What program do you use? How did you make the writing? Was it just a lot of patience or is there a technique you used? :)
P.s. It seems you've changed the red eyes slightly, I like it :). I also like the smile, just mentioning.
edit:
Ok, sorry for the weird artifacts, I didn't know MSPaint did that to gifs:
(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/blood.GIF)
I don't think I drew it well, but I've already uninstalled Photoshop and don't have much time anyway. What I meant was, you know how it looks if you dip a brush into paint or blood, and have painted for a while, then the paint becomes less fluid? You see stripes of paint? Well, that's what I meant. Or even just think letters. This just looks more like a red pencil than blood.. Dunno. Maybe it's a feather pen dipped in blood, but then it should be a bit smoother :P.
Haddas:
That sounds like some good ideas - I haven't had time to think about sounds yet, I was saving that until last... :) But my mail should work - Could you try again or maybe upload them somewhere?
The only thing I was thinking of was having some sort of tense music during all these "days", much like in GK1, if you remember how those sounded... Rather dark and foreboding music.
I'll see if I add soundeffects as well, though, because some of the ones you mention sounds like they could fit in rather nice... :)
Zor:
Heh, yeah, I'm feeling pretty done with it as well now...
Ginny:
As I said, I'm not sure I will incorporate all of the sound effects, but some of them would probabably be a good idea... :)
1) Meh, well, I don't know, I'm rather satisfied with the end as it is now, but I could make an edit to see how it looks...
2) Maybe, maybe... That easily fixed in any case... Hehe...
3) Yeah, I know you mentioned this earlier, but I forgot to change it...
4) You could be right here too...
5) That was really just out of pure laziness, really... I'll give it a try...
It's a nice example, but I don't think I'll change it now - I like the effect of being almost "carved" in with a knife, instead of drawn in blood... :)
I actually did the whole thing in Paint, and then used "Microsoft Picture It!" for fading effects and compiling the animation, and MS Gif Animator to adjust and tweak it... :)
Anyways, thanks for the comments, as usual!
Yeah, I kinda think it looks like writing in blood with a knife or something, so that's cool.. Or it might be a knife cutting through the background and blood coming out..
My last and final suggestion, which I just forgot to write, is for there to be a bit more blood leaking from the words, like in the previous version. Actually I'm no longer sure it's better to have it written than to have the letters "leak" down, but I'm sure just a little blood drip will make it creepier :D.
I'll try and imagine my own sound effects idea later, maybe you'll like it. I'm pretty crazy for sound effects, I just love them! :)
Rincewind, does that mean that day 1 of your game is finished?
I like it when her face totally blacks out, and just the eyes are left. Though I'm pleased you got rid of the second blink; it was a bit patronising for me. The first time she blinked I thought "cool! this rocks!" then "oh- wait. no - not you again! I thought you were over! Go away you silly red eyeballs!" Anyway, the point is, I love the finished product, but maybe fade the face to black? (Doesn't really bother me. Looks awesome either way)
Absolutely briliant! Also nice to see such an actively helping community, cause *cough* I'm sure going to need it later on;)
Ginny, you're right about that one as well, it could use some more blood... (That sounds a lot more morbid than I intended it to...) Looking forward to hearing your ideas for soundeffects!
Vel:
No, that means I've almost finished the cutscene animation for day 2... :)
I've been working my arse off to get the whole story together, and as I more or less have got the basic outline ready for it, I thought that I could do some more graphics to get some rest from it for a while... Heh... It's far from finished, though... So I'm not even gonna think of importing anything into AGS before I have all the graphics and a solid plot to stand on... ;)
Peter Thomas:
Ok,Ã, nice to hear you like it...Ã, But doesn't it fade to black already?
Dux:
I totally agree with you - This is why I love the critics lounge. :)
Quote from: Rincewind on Sat 08/05/2004 10:00:23Peter Thomas:
Ok,Ã, nice to hear you like it...Ã, But doesn't it fade to black already?
It does fade to black, but the face should be entirely balced out I think.Right now you can still see some of it. I think this would also improve the effect of the eyes being opened red during the fade, which right now looks a little odd.
Dux: Indeed, it's a great community! Welcome to AGS.. ;)