This is a tricky tightrope to walk; while I would like feedback on the story I've come up with for my project, I also don't want to ruin the story for anyone, as its got one or two twists in it along the way. So, here's my best to keep it vague, yet specific. :P
CMK Studios presents SCIENCE FICTION
Setting: The Future, circa 1950. That is, what people in the 50's may have thought the future would look like in 20 or so years, similar to how a futuristic movie from the 80's (like Total Recall) is almost instantly recognizable as a movie from the 80s. So, fashion and style are generally 50's, while emphasis is placed on things that the era expected to advance and change: space travel, atomic energy, communism, etc...
Story:
Callahan Hensen, a professor at a university in California, is planning a field trip for some of his students later in the week. In preperation he, along with an unwilling brilliant student of his, Bernard, who is serving a detention, goes out to the nearby Sierra Nevada mountains to set up a camp site for the trip.
After a few hours setting up equipment, there is a blinding flash in the sky and a crash in the woods nearby. An eerie glow can be seen on the horizon where the boom came from. The duo go to investigate, finding a path of downed trees and mysterious men in black standing around, warding off onlookers, playing the situation down as an airplane crash. Bernard, intrigued by the situation and unconvinced by the mysterious men, slinks past the police line and down to the crash, leaving Hensen watching as the student he is responsible for runs into the distance. He has to get Bernard back, or its his ass, so to speak. He manages to find a way down to the crash and is shocked at what he discovers: a UFO, definitely not human made. Bernard in hand, Hensen attempts to get away before anyone sees, but he is seen and captured, and imprisoned.
One of the mysterious men in black give him an ultimatum. After what Hensen has seen, it seems his days are numbered. His only chance to save himself and his student is to help the government with a space mission to negotiate with the alien beings before they annhilate Earth. The entire situation seems suspicious and convoluted, especially since they seem completely unqualified for this, but Hensen and Bernard agree, fearing for their lives.
They are put onboard a ship with an able crew of 3 (including a pilot/astronaut, maintenance, and a doctor) and they set out on the adventure of their lives. Along the way, they encounter ominous, empty, "haunted" ships from early US space flights, alien outposts, dangerous robots, ravenous killer beasts, a cold, calculated computer, and unseen treachery as they begin to find that their innocent, revolutionary, heroic trip to galaxies unknown is far more terrifying and sinister than they could have imagined.
The game takes place over the span of 10 acts, with the first three taking place on Earth and the remaining 7 taking elsewhere.
Act names so far...:
ACT I - Prologue to an Adventure
ACT II - A Twinkle in the Sky
ACT III - ??
ACT IV - Far Horizens
ACT V - Orbit II
ACT VI - ??
ACT VII - ??
ACT VIII - Atomic Dust
ACT IX - ??
ACT X - Epilogue
Anyway, any thoughts on the story? I guess the most important thing at this point is does it peak any sort of interest in you? Does this story sound interesting? If not, what do you think could be done to make it better?
I don't know if this is for an adventure game, but if it is, isn't 10 acts too much? Not even commecial games have 10 acts.
I can't say much about the story since it's only a summery of the first chapter(?), so I don't know if the main character is a hetero american hero/rebelious teenager, but saving the world(i.e. america) or die sounds forced and unamerican in eighter case.
But like I said, I don't know the story.