Up and Down - a song by me and a friend

[voh]

http://www.danwa.net/junk/Fixage%20No!/upndown.mp3

It's a rough mix, as well as a rough recording. We'd written this song in 4 minutes or so (first improvised playthrough provided us with an entire song - I love it when a song comes together) and we recorded it in about an hour's time. 3 guitar tracks (rythm, melody and solo), which all took about 2 takes to get right (and even then there's mistakes in the melody part), 1 vocal track (which took 6 takes) and there is a drum track, but it's not finished so not in this mix

Kindly comment!

[Nikolas]

The song is great and so are the lyrics.

It could (maybe) use a middle sections, apart from the solo, to break the repeated dequence of chord changing. But it's not necessary, and I keep listening to it for the third time

Of course production wise, this is just a concept song I guess and I know that you are aware of that.

Generally you could use, the drums, the bass, the second guitar which is almost impossible to listen when the vocals enter, a little reverb on the voice (and some autotuning maybe... sorry but you're just a tad out of tune sometimes). Maybe a live violin?

There are many things you could do, but as it is and for what it is it stands great!

Thanks for letting us listen to it

[ManicMatt]

*Plays song while browsing*

Not sure about the "Helloooo!" bits in the so- Oh that was just the annoying face pack adverts on the internet. It did fool me for a split second!

I like the little solo thing three quarters in, although it maybe went away too soon. I think the guitars could do with a little bit more variety in them, they have the same kind of rythym all the way through, don't they? EDIT: Oh it's not just me then, Nikolas!

It's a grower lyrically alright though! I'd be keen to hear this song with the drums! Vocals suit the style of song.

EDIT AGAIN: Actually, the solo thing is just the right length after hearing it again. How would this song sound with some backing vocals, that are slightly higher in pitch?

[voh]

We were thinking of doing backing vocals, but we were done with it for that moment. We're both going to listen to the song for a week, practice it, perfect it.

The solo will change somewhat, and the final mix is going to include bass and drums, as well as backing vocals on the chorus (at the very least for the "up and down" bits), which might be higher or not, don't know what sounds best yet.

I know my voice is out of tune from time to time, but this was the first time I managed to get through the entire song without laughing halfway in, so it'll have to do for now. Once we get back together for the next recording session, I'll make sure to sing better

[Moresco]

ah acoustic rock.  good stuff, quite a bit repetitive for my tastes, but still good.  the voice range doesn't appeal to me, so it's not your fault.  good singing.

i think with a second guitar part that was interesting and simple, and definetly some vocal harmonies above your range, I'd gravitate to it more.  But that's ok, nicely done!

[Theeph]

I really liked this.

Quite head-noddy. Not too intrusive for an AG either... would work as bgm or as title track/credits/whatever.

I like.