Adventure Game Studio

Community => General Discussion => Topic started by: DCillusion on Thu 13/01/2005 23:09:45

Title: AGS Church
Post by: DCillusion on Thu 13/01/2005 23:09:45
I was thinking, this year a great birthday present for our grand creator CJ would be the formation of AGS - The religion.

Is there a protocol for this in the U.K.?  In the U.S., anyone may form a unitarian faith; so long as it has:

- A form of scripture
- A tangile leadership
- A strong, (small or large), group of followers

these rules are VERY interpretive, there's even a Beer Church & a Music Church

Faith leaders have key benefits including:

- Complete exemption from Federal, State, Income, & Property taxes
- Their children go to college free of charge
- Free health care, (does that matter in England?)
- Elligable for certain Federal Grants

I think it's a great idea.  If it's formed, the only thing we would have to do is agree to join, to show following.  We wouldn't have to tithe, go anywhere, do anything.  It's EASY!!  I would sign up.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Pumaman on Thu 13/01/2005 23:31:09
Sadly, the AGS Religion was dissolved last year, after a tearful Final Supper.

(http://www.agagames.com/grundislav/supper.jpg)
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: DCillusion on Thu 13/01/2005 23:34:13
NEVER, in my wildest dreams, would I have believed you had a picture representing this post! :o

The AGS'er in the "Judas" position even appears ready to turn you into some Vivendi authority.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Evil on Fri 14/01/2005 00:01:32
Are you stroking AGA's chin?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Squinky on Fri 14/01/2005 00:47:05
It looks like AGA's getting retting to spit out a meatball on Chris's hand.....or is that just what I would like to see happen?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Blade on Fri 14/01/2005 12:38:18
Cool picture  :D

I heard about four dudes in Poland forming a church to avoid conscription. I believe they called it "The Church of Olive Tree". The only requirements were to have followers, to make a scripture and to have regular (one for half a year at least) meetings to discuss the church's affairs. So the followers were these for guys, they made some bull***t scripture and made meetings once half a year during which they talked, drank lots of beer and laughed from what they had in scripture, making some cosmetic changes to it.
And they never went to army.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Paper Carnival on Fri 14/01/2005 15:36:51
do we have like heresies or denominations?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: DragonRose on Fri 14/01/2005 15:54:31
The New Order of Druids in California is similar to that. There was a university there  that required everyone to go to religious services on Sundays, so a bunch of students and profs got together under a nearby oak tree, drank whiskey, read poems and said they were Druids.

Personally, I can think of worse ways to spend my Sundays.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Nacho on Fri 14/01/2005 16:35:38
We have something to start.

The Mesiah: Chris Jones... Of course, it must't be the human form, so, let's kill him and invent something completelly new and epic for his life and death. (A silent retirement of the public life would work too).

The symbol: The blueCup.

Saint Peter: Roger.

The Bible: AGS manual.

Apostles... I am not sure... I think they could be the first miteneers. We even have Yathzee, who could be a kind of John the baptist and all... We need a Judas. NTL?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Babar on Fri 14/01/2005 16:41:26
what about AGS program itself? It's constant re-incarnations in much better forms has to count for something! What about the fallen angels/devil/satan person? Andy Penis?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Ishmael on Fri 14/01/2005 17:00:31
I've been referring to the Holy Manual for ages already...
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Czar on Fri 14/01/2005 18:04:06
Now, looking at it from a more serious perspective, this would mean joining a REAL religion in the law, so that would mean ABANDONING your current religion, if you have one that is.

Yes, even if it is only for a joke and benefits you would be no longer a member of i.e. the christian church.

C.


btw i'm all for the killing CJ in torture (all in the purpose of him resurrecting or becoming a higher being)
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Nacho on Fri 14/01/2005 18:05:59
Quote from: Czar on Fri 14/01/2005 18:04:06
Now, looking at it from a more serious perspective, this would mean joining a REAL religion in the law, so that would mean ABANDONING your current religion, if you have one that is.

Yes, even if it is only for a joke and benefits you would be no longer a member of i.e. the christian church.

C.

Where do I must sign to quit?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Babar on Fri 14/01/2005 18:08:47
sign? All you have to do is bathe in holy code from the blue cup. Once that is done, you have full permission to make the sign of the cup accross your chest
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: BerserkerTails on Fri 14/01/2005 18:22:58
Considering I'm not a part of any religion, as I don't believe in any of them, I'd definitley join the AGS religion. Hahaha, I'd be a great story to tell people when they ask you what you believe in.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Czar on Fri 14/01/2005 18:30:29
 Czar calls the Devil
Czar: What are you wearing?
THE DEVIIIL666: Why, my regular tight black jeans, red tight shirt, leather thon.... wait a minute?!!! Who is this?!
Czar: Hey Dev, it's me!
THE DEVIIIL666: Hello Czar
Czar: I need you to bring me the contract
THE DEVIIIL666:THE Conract?
Czar: Yeah,it's for this huge guy
THE DEVIIIL666:Is he stronger than me?
Czar: No, Dev, never! You know you're the man!
THE DEVIIIL666: Aaah, you're just saying that to make me feel better!
Czar: No, really! You're the bad ass!
THE DEVIIIL666: Ah, stooop!
Czar: No you're the man!
THE DEVIIIL666: Nooo, you're the man!
Czar: No, you tha man!
THE DEVIIIL666:No, you are!
Czar: No you are!
THE DEVIIIL666: You make me so horny when you talk dirty!

etc. etc.
I dont want to go further cause it gets more intimate later

He said he will bring it to you, you just need to sign here.
Of course, as it goes, you must not know what are you signing, so:


Customer Pre-Sign:____________


Approved by: Czar


C.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Evil on Fri 14/01/2005 19:19:40
Quote from: Babar on Fri 14/01/2005 16:41:26
what about AGS program itself? It's constant re-incarnations in much better forms has to count for something!
Re-incarnations from DOS to Windows?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Babar on Fri 14/01/2005 19:24:49
And all the subsequent versions after that!
Quote from: Czar on Fri 14/01/2005 18:04:06
Now, looking at it from a more serious perspective, this would mean joining a REAL religion in the law, so that would mean ABANDONING your current religion, if you have one that is.

Yes, even if it is only for a joke and benefits you would be no longer a member of i.e. the christian church.
But it doesn't have to be a new religion, it can be a denomination of an old one.
For example, it could be said that using the blood of CJ- found on the bluecup (also known as the holy grail), the spirit of St Roger cloned CJ so that CJ could bring St Roger to semi-life (on the computer screen). Since CJ was a carpenter in previous life, it is only natural that the modern CJ would be a programmer.
In fact, why only focus on Christianity? CJ can also be known as Mithras/Buddha/Krishna etc.
I think I just created a cult. And I am the High Priest! Mwahahahahahaha
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Rui 'Trovatore' Pires on Fri 14/01/2005 20:42:32
Heh. It's the second time in less than a week something like this pops up, have you noticed it? That thread about AGS in wikipedia also turned into a sort of cult.

...

...oh yeah, on topic. Huh, God bless CJ, AGS and the, uh, Holy Forum! Amen!
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Haddas on Fri 14/01/2005 22:51:19
This reminds me of those yearly AGS meetings, called mittens. What is their significance?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Redwall on Fri 14/01/2005 23:02:19
QuoteIn the beginning, the almighty God created man and Adventure, and it was good. He gave to his greatest followers Lucas and Sierra the power to create Adventure, and to teach others to do the same.

For a time, man lived in harmony with God, aided by Adventure. But then, the Doom came, and evil spread throughout the world. The Second Doom came, and soon after the three Quakes, and Adventure and the worship of God was forgotten.

Then God spoke to his prophet Chris Jones and said to him, "Go forth! And teach all to make Adventure and worship Me!" And the humble Chris Jones said, "Oh Lord Almighty of Heaven and Earth! How can I make Adventure without the ancient tools?"

And so God gave Chris Jones the Adventure Creater, and it was good. He sent Roger, the greatest son of Sierra and an Angel of God, to watch over Chris Jones.

With the word of God and the Adventure Creator, Chris Jones created the Manual, the Holy Word of the almighty God that taught others to create Adventure with the tools given to Chris Jones by the Lord.

Chris Jones then left his home and carried with him only a Blue Cup to show his devotion to his Lord. And he gave the Adventure Creator to others, and the Manual, and soon men were once more making Adventure.

And then He created the Holy Forum for all who worship God and his prophet Chris Jones to gather and help others create Adventure, and it was good.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Bombadil on Fri 14/01/2005 23:28:05
That's a very cool idea!

I can't wait to see the scripture...
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: DragonRose on Fri 14/01/2005 23:33:37
Redwall, that is FANTASTIC. Especially the bits about the Dooms and the three Quakes.  It is super-dooper.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Goldmund on Sat 15/01/2005 00:13:29
!Achtung Farlander!

If you're really so eager to sign out of christianity...

I dare you now to post a scanned piece of paper, on which there's written "I hereby resign from the ownership of my soul and give it to Satan for eternal use", with your real signature.
Come on, Nacho.
I dare you.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: TerranRich on Sat 15/01/2005 02:25:09
Heh, this is bordering on blasphemous. ;D

We have the "holy trinity," so to speak: Roger (holy spirit), AGS (son), and teh Chris Jones (father).

So if the analogy holds, AGS (the son), has had its second coming in Windows form. And of course, there is an alternate AGS that certan people worship (Linux/Unix users), which I guess would be what Lutheran/Protestant is to Christian. Or something like that.

Scary how this forum and our activities can already be seen as a sort of religion (Mittens, our church, and our Lord and savior, Chris[t] Jones). :P
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: on Sat 15/01/2005 03:28:12
Quote from: Goldmund on Sat 15/01/2005 00:13:29
!Achtung Farlander!

If you're really so eager to sign out of christianity...

I dare you now to post a scanned piece of paper, on which there's written "I hereby resign from the ownership of my soul and give it to Satan for eternal use", with your real signature.
Come on, Nacho.
I dare you.

AHEM

To Jesus Chris, NOT Satan.

Get your facts straight.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Rui 'Trovatore' Pires on Sat 15/01/2005 07:42:01
Redwall, does that mean there are 2 Gods (Crowther and Woods, builder of Colossal Caves)?
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Moox on Sat 15/01/2005 08:27:15
Would satan be phil rogers or the rpg creator?  ;)
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Bombadil on Sat 15/01/2005 09:56:25
Quote from: LostTraveler on Sat 15/01/2005 08:27:15
Would satan be phil rogers or the rpg creator?  ;)

Satan should be the new George Lucas... [but maybe he fits better in Judas...]
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Andail on Sat 15/01/2005 10:52:57
Will there be a musical? Jesus Chris Superstar? I demand a musical.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Nacho on Sat 15/01/2005 12:12:47
(http://www.2dadventure.com/ags/resign.jpg)
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Andail on Sat 15/01/2005 13:01:09
I think Santiagarro just got some chills
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Babar on Sat 15/01/2005 14:08:35
Hey Farl, can I buy your soul? Since you are renouncing it anyway.... I just thought I might be able to pick up some of the artistic "Essence of the Juan Ignacio". I would be willing to trade it for some "AGS goodwill points" which is the new way of scoring in the AGS church.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Nacho on Sat 15/01/2005 14:10:17
Santiagarro? Who is him?  ???

And Babar, that document means that I am just selling something I think I do not own, so, if you want to buy something of me, send the money and I'll see what can I do. XD
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Pumaman on Sat 15/01/2005 14:13:45
Quote from: Andail on Sat 15/01/2005 10:52:57
Will there be a musical? Jesus Chris Superstar? I demand a musical.

No, but there will be a Mittens: The Opera, in which we will insert as many swear words as possible to attract media interest.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: YOke on Sat 15/01/2005 14:31:00
Could smoking pot be part of the religion? It is legal if it's in your religion you know... Oh, and making moonshine is a good thing... Maybe parking in the handicapped parking spaces too!
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Ishmael on Sat 15/01/2005 20:13:33
Quote from: Redwall on Fri 14/01/2005 23:02:19
QuoteIn the beginning, the almighty God created man and Adventure, and it was good. He gave to his greatest followers Lucas and Sierra the power to create Adventure, and to teach others to do the same.

For a time, man lived in harmony with God, aided by Adventure. But then, the Doom came, and evil spread throughout the world. The Second Doom came, and soon after the three Quakes, and Adventure and the worship of God was forgotten.

Then God spoke to his prophet Chris Jones and said to him, "Go forth! And teach all to make Adventure and worship Me!" And the humble Chris Jones said, "Oh Lord Almighty of Heaven and Earth! How can I make Adventure without the ancient tools?"

And so God gave Chris Jones the Adventure Creater, and it was good. He sent Roger, the greatest son of Sierra and an Angel of God, to watch over Chris Jones.

With the word of God and the Adventure Creator, Chris Jones created the Manual, the Holy Word of the almighty God that taught others to create Adventure with the tools given to Chris Jones by the Lord.

Chris Jones then left his home and carried with him only a Blue Cup to show his devotion to his Lord. And he gave the Adventure Creator to others, and the Manual, and soon men were once more making Adventure.

And then He created the Holy Forum for all who worship God and his prophet Chris Jones to gather and help others create Adventure, and it was good.

I'd do one change, but that's just me...

Add to the last chapter:
QuoteAnd then He built the Holy Forum as his house for all who worship God and his prophet Chris Jones to gather and help others create Adventure, and it was good.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Czar on Sat 15/01/2005 20:40:21
Hmm, i have found one of the ancient lost relics.
It was under some church, and i had to tie a goat to some iron because it kept hitting me.

(http://www.tdrdesign.net/uploads/micsis2.jpg)

C.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Paper Carnival on Sat 15/01/2005 21:07:35
Quote from: Ishmael on Sat 15/01/2005 20:13:33
I'd do one change, but that's just me...

Add to the last chapter:
QuoteAnd then He built the Holy Forum as his house for all who worship God and his prophet Chris Jones to gather and help others create Adventure, and it was good.

We have the first heresy
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Pumaman on Sat 15/01/2005 21:46:53
Quote from: Czar on Sat 15/01/2005 20:40:21
Hmm, i have found one of the ancient lost relics.
It was under some church, and i had to tie a goat to some iron because it kept hitting me.


I think you've actually surpassed me to win Worst Photoshop Ever!
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: DragonRose on Sat 15/01/2005 22:22:05
That was actually from a Photoshop Phriday a long time ago. I think the challenge was to AGSify classic art.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: BMF-Inc on Sat 15/01/2005 22:45:01
Let me just say that there is one vital event that is missing in the mythology of Agsianism. The betrayal of sierra to the great being of Adventure.  Forever shall we wheep over the blow struck against our lord and savior adventure..but.....by the glory and grace of the one known as Chris...It has risen from the ashes to spread fourth it's adventury goodness
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Domino on Sat 15/01/2005 22:49:45
Could we set a certain day to celebrate this new religion, so i could get a day off of work?  ;D

Maybe we could fill baskets with eggs and AGS games, and let our loved ones search for them.  That would be fun.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Moox on Sun 16/01/2005 03:22:11
or we could gather around and drink peackocks blood...
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: DragonRose on Sun 16/01/2005 09:01:40
Quote from: Dark of Night on Sat 15/01/2005 22:49:45
Maybe we could fill baskets with eggs and AGS games, and let our loved ones search for them.  That would be fun.

An easter egg hunt would be excellent! I found one in KQ2VGA+! It's the Madness of King Graham!



Maybe I shouldn't attempt humour when it's this late at night- or early in the morning as the case may be.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Czar on Sun 16/01/2005 12:45:09
but "your holyless", as Lady Dragon DeRose stated, that is from an old Photoshop phriday, so yes, the leader of the religion must also have one flaw, the unability to phriday the photoshops!


And after the betrayal of Master Sierra, there was the double betrayal in the times of fake reinessance by another one of the history's great,  the big Artist, Lord Lucas.
Yes, it should be written in half riddles, in a path between nostradamus and hemingway.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Blade on Sun 16/01/2005 14:08:46
Who will be the bishops? Will we form churches were priests will show how to make adventure on the masses? I already imagine the worst sin:

Believer: Bless me fathaer because I sinned.
Priest: Tell me your sins, son.
B: I deleted AGS from my hard drive.
Priest: You will receive no consolation! You're damned through all time! I hereby ezpell you from this church and entire AGS community!
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Moox on Sun 16/01/2005 17:00:32
We can do the muslim thing and require everyone to go to mittens at least once before they die. We could even pray facing the location of the next mittens five times daily.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Evil on Sun 16/01/2005 17:52:32
Hah, the Muslim thing sounds good. We could also require them to own a specific number of games.
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: Blackthorne on Mon 17/01/2005 02:24:49
You're all making the baby Jesus cry.

Bt
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: on Mon 17/01/2005 08:32:29
The declaration to become AGSian:
"There is no true Adventure Engine but AGS, and Chris is the programmer of AGS"

For small sins all you have to do is run 4 "Hello World" AGS programs. for bigger sins, you must make a full fledged game
Title: Re: AGS Church
Post by: on Mon 31/01/2005 08:04:15
Your insistance on modeling the AGS religion off Xtianity disgusts me. It doesn't focus on the right aspects of AGS.

I declare myself an eclectic AGSer. I shall read the manual, but I shall not use the AGS application. Instead, I shall create games by imprinting my thoughts onto crystals, and showing these crystals to the computer monitor. That is the method I enjoy best for game creation, because learning all that complicated code is hard.  I shall not call out to CJ, but to JC. CJ does not seem the correct aspect to call on for adventure gaming. He's got bad taste in beer, and frankly lacks the fertility aspect that makes deities so damn loveable. JC, on the other hand, has very fine taste in clothing and is well endowed in the right places. So, I have already begun construction of a JC fetish which will grace my altar (computer desk).

I shall get in tough with my inner adventure gamer by chanting the name of the ags icon, bluecup.  Bluecup is a male/female entity, and shows us a profound truth by at once being a cup, yet being unable to contain what it holds. I shall empty my mind like the bluecup, and so become enlightened.

The rest of my tenets and suchlike. I plan on incorperating the beer and boobs into this religion, since it seems rather sterile in this department. I guess that comes from Xtian influence.