King of The Hill

[Shane 'ProgZmax' Stevens]

Digs around in his collection of characters for a game-breaker...


1.  I'd send Limey up the hill but he's far too lazy for the climb.  Besides, it's much shadier at the base of the hill, perfect for lazing about with some meat pies.

2.  I'd send Lucky but he'd quickly get distracted by a butterfly or a rock and just stand there trying to hug it.

3.  I'd send Noah but he'd probably have a fit half-way up the side and freak out, or worse, forget why he was doing it.

4.  I'd send Ace Starkiller but he'd just blow the shit out of the planet the hill was on (he's done it before).

5.  I'd send Boyd but he's just a kid and he'd get easily pushed around unless you're a clown mime (then it's on!).

Therefore, I CHOOSE RICHARD SIMMONS.


*Richard Simmons strolls up the side of the hill effortlessly, doing two or three cartwheels just to show off.  Once at the top, he uses his irresistible POWERS OF DANCE to make everyone on the hill JAZZERCISE!  "It's time to sweat to the oldies you lardies!"

[Sane Co.]

I manage to stop dancing and get trilby's grolly, which I use to snipe Richard simmons, my plan was to pull him off the hill, sadly he died in the process, I tell the trilbys to clean up, and continue on with my day.