If the human body was a computer, what error/information messages would it give?

[Edwin Xie]

Alzheimers Disease:

System has detected a bad file "depression.exe" and since you are over 70 that file just initiates the virus "alzheimer.exe".
Deleting memory.....
You now know nothing.................

Death should be like this:

This system does not have enough free memory space and is not stable enough to run. Uninstalling bloodflow.exe...
Uninstalling beating heart.exe...
Shutting down main body system....
Shutdown
Results stopped the brain and the other vital organs...
Initiating stopbodymovement.exe...

[Rui 'Trovatore' Pires]

This system does not have enough free memory space and is not stable enough to run. Uninstalling bloodflow.exe...
Uninstalling beating heart.exe...
Results stopped the brain and the other vital organs...
Initiating stopbodymovement.exe... 

You forgot to add "System shutdown... Compl - "

[R4L]

Eating error

An error occured when you tried to run Eat_Food.EXE.
Windows cannot find file Stomach.DLL.
Windows cannot find file Throat.DLL
Please re-install Microsoft Eats.

[Hollister Man]

(In reference to 'Ow my leg!' thread)

Contracthamstring.exe is operating outside normal parameters, please end task and restart.


Howbout this one:

Error: Follicle up-time has exceeded operating parameters, ejecting hair.
Hair motivation complete, process follicle.exe now running in back memory.

[Edwin Xie]

(In reference to 'Ow my leg!' thread)

Contracthamstring.exe is operating outside normal parameters, please end task and restart.


Howbout this one:

Error: Follicle up-time has exceeded operating parameters, ejecting hair.
Hair motivation complete, process follicle.exe now running in back memory.

That's a good one

[DinghyDog]

The program "common_sense.exe" is not responding.
a) Force shut-down
b) Wait
c) Tell your girlfriend she's ugly



-DD

[SSH]

Adaptation of old jokes:

c:> light cigarette
cigarette: no such file
c:> buy cigarette
cigarette: brand ambiguous
c:> f!$&* buy cigarette*.*
cigarette*.* bought
c:> light cigarette*.*
No Match


or...

c:> girlfriend hug kiss smooch nudge nudge
girlfriend: too many arguments

[Andail]

Having sex, in a female perspective. (I'm so perverted)

New hardware detected
Beginning data transfer

Pah, this doesn't even make sense. My apologizes.

[Evil]

Either way, I would still have a naked woman on my desktop.

[Mr Jake]

USB 2.0 compatible of course

[R4L]

Craping...

Running BowelMovement.EXE
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Cannot find BrokeSweat.DLL and STROKE.EXE

Please run STROKE.EXE again, then install Microsoft TP v.2.93




2004 WinDOS