This makes me embarassed for my childhood

[Hakujin]

I came across this site for old video game ads. It's amazing how UNCOOL they manage to make video games look... I picked out the best ones for you here. (Some of these can take a while to load...)

Not your dad's video game system! It's like a 90s teen tampon commercial for boys!:
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2089

YOU WILL EAT, DRINK & SLEEP NINTENDO! YOU WILL OBEY ONLY NINTENDO!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=1096

Look at the controller on this one. I swear that kid is VIDEOBATING!!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2265

This is one of my favourites. Is this dad COOL or what? And the whole wine with your wife while playing a game of Dig Dug? Classic!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2182

This is bad on so many levels. I love how they were still trying to convince women to play games at that point. I mean, they're still working on that!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2184

Three letters to describe this one: OMG
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2470

Acid isn't the only thing that gives you uncomfortable flashbacks to your past:
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2557

Remember when 'graphics' was a technical term? LOL
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=406

I want to be a serious nerd when I grow up! I think another final argument is that, 'Someday, both these kids are going to be looking to get laid.'
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2468

Buy Commodore! Would Captain James T. Kirk lie to you? (I love how they had to superimpose the kid ontop of the keyboard!)
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2464

You can REALLY HEAR the difference! I'm sold!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=1954

And even though you're only 12, Intellivsion2 will englarge your penis by up to FOUR times!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=1952

Hell, attacking the sheild of the Koteck's Face is one of the funnest things ever! It's WAY OUT!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2162

[Las Naranjas]

http://www.sega-network.de/mmarchive/satmedia.htm

scroll down to SEGATA SANSHIRO at the bottom.

These ads make up for every possible bad game ad in existence, notably the bomberman, Soccer RPG and final advertisments.

[Kinoko]

I've only seen the first one so far but those kids look like such pretentious little Breakfast Club/Degrassi High watching twats.

[MrColossal]

This is one of my favourites. Is this dad COOL or what? And the whole wine with your wife while playing a game of Dig Dug? Classic!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2182

I must say, it doesn't look like the dad is playing anything other than himself on the table top version of dig dug

[Hakujin]

The way he jumps up, it looks like he's even BEATING himself!!

I mean...at the game.

[Erenan]

YOU WILL EAT, DRINK & SLEEP NINTENDO! YOU WILL OBEY ONLY NINTENDO!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=1096

I remember eating that cereal!

Ah... those were the days.

Or something.

[Hakujin]

Yeah...but did you ever Attack the Sheild of the Kotek's Face?! 

My favourite is the space ark one. That kid brings new meaning to the term playing with your joystick! Seriously, though. Was the director like, 'now here's the part where you work yourself into a frenzied extasy by...button mashing?' Really sells the game play It's also fun to find on that site the commercial for the Atari ET game - you know, the one that they buried millions of in a secret new mexico dump site because it was sooooooo bad...historically entertaining.

[HillBilly]

Oh, who likes old games anyway?

I'm hooked on that Nintendo Cereal song tough!

Nin-ten-doh!

[Pesty]

http://www.sega-network.de/mmarchive/satmedia.htm

scroll down to SEGATA SANSHIRO at the bottom.

These ads make up for every possible bad game ad in existence, notably the bomberman, Soccer RPG and final advertisments.

I think you all missed this post, since you're obviously not blown away by the awesome. There is so much awesome in those commercials that even I can barely handle it!

Also: http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=110 They have my favorite commercial ever, even though it's very bad quality.

[Las Naranjas]

I repeat.

SEGATA SANSHIRO

[Dart]

... damn, I have an urge for that Nintendo cereal now. -_-

If they ever have that cereal for sale on eBay, I am SO buying it. Heck, I'll even pay up to $500 for a box. But luckily I don't have an eBay account so I can't buy all of the things I want there. If I did, I'd probably be bankrupt right around now.

[edmundito]

SEGATA SANSHIRO!  :'(

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.

(gameads version:
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_games_commercials.asp?SEARCH=segata+sanshiro)

[Hakujin]

I wonder if they named him Segata Sanshiro because it sounds really close to Sega Satan Shiyoo ("Play  (literally 'use') Sega Saturn") in Japanese...

[Kinoko]

Well, why not just use "shiro" which is like an order, so "Play Sega Satan!". still, "Ta San" isn't much like Satan.

[Hakujin]

is that how you turn suru into a command? Shiro?

But the way they use it (Sega Sata-n using standard romaji and japanese pronounciation is how they would say 'Saturn'), Segata Sanshiro sounds extremely close in the video. The fact that they keep repeating the name and then have him, at the end, DEFINATELY saying 'Sega Sata-n (saturn) shiro' strikes me that it was on purpose. Check it out and listen, he actually says sega saturn shiro at the end, rather than segata sanshiro.

[Las Naranjas]

He likes saying his own name, even when tearfully flying to his heroic death.

It's beautiful.

[Kinoko]

Quick Japanese lesson ^_^ \/

suru - plain present
shinai - negative
shite iru - am doing
shite kudasai - please do
shiyou - let's do
shiro - command, "Do!"

Does anyone know what the deal with those "Mr. Sega" ads is? Holy hell, they're weird... the guy gets beaten up @_@

[SpacePirateCaine]

Indeed, the character name "Segata Sanshiro"  is a play on words created by the marketing folks at Sega, and a parody of the name of one of Kurosawa Akira's movies, "Sugata Sanshiro" (A movie about a man that wishes to learn Judo) (imdb link). The pronounciation of "Saturn" is 'Sataan', so by taking the 'ta' from the middle, they changed it to fit the name correctly.

As Kinoko mentioned 'Shiro!' is the command form of the japanese verb 'suru'. (One of the only two irregular verbs, incidentally, in the japanese language), therefore making "Play Sega Saturn!". And, at the same time, they also included the message that the Saturn's chassis color was white (Also 'shiro' in Japanese), which was a large part of their pitch (As all sega systems before it were black). So "Sega Saturn, Shiro!" becomes "Segata Sanshiro!"

As far as the character himself is concerned, because 'Sugata Sanshiro' was about Judo, they hired famous Japanese samurai/martial arts actor Fujioka Hiroshi to be their spokesperson, and catch the attention of the TV watching public with a series of frightening, memorable ads. And the rest, as they say, is history.

Information according to the Segata Sanshiro Wikipedia entry (Japanese)

[Scummbuddy]

1) that was a sad, sad commercial. I like how it appeals to Generation X'ers... It'll be a hit.
2) That cereal did rock. There were games on the back of the box... there were two cereals in one box. We're talking ground breaking stuff here.
3) Is that older kid "Ralphie" of "A Christmas Story"?  I think it was... imdb this one.
4) He totally looks like he's beating off behind that table top version. I know where to get the Ms. Pacman version of that table top type. Maybe I can look as cool as he does when playing.
5) You didnt even mention that they did not show any gameplay at all. Go play "Space Duel"... because we said so.  i mean, look at the graphics of the arcade machine... it must be good!
6) They just made the foriegn language computer as an excuse for moms and dads to say, oh, i can see why we need one of these... and then you'll just be playing missle command, while "Bon Jour!" sits in dust.
7)I think this one deserve the OMG description. "Hey nameless thug, come over here and beat a level and laugh. Ahuh, huh, grunt, huh.
I'm going to show them the mountain zone.... woa! almost hit one. <phew> Oh, no the stripe zone. I can't handle going vertical, while still shooting in FOUR directions!1!  Did he just say four directions?!?! Indeed.
8)Nothing so bad about this one... except maybe for that beanie.
9)Oooo vector graphics! The future is here.
13) "Ok, kids. I see it! Now shut up! And stop putting your hands in front of the screen! I can't see all the little pixels to blow up.

I miss the Saturn and all, but not this commercial. http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=2485

and what, no virtual boy commercials... pfft.

[Blitzerland]

You can REALLY HEAR the difference! I'm sold!
http://gameads.gamepressure.com/tv_game_commercial.asp?ID=1954

Wow. I weep for humanity.

I wonder if there were any adventure games on the Atari...that'd be hillarious. Damn, now I have to find a Pitfall commerical.