how to stop unwanted calls, or spam snail mail?

[Nikolas]

Any ideas.

I just closed a year living in the same place and all of a suddent every now and then people call me (by my last name), asking if I need money, or a new mobile or something like that.

Additionally I get snail mail from mortage companies and the sorts...

I'm not the guy who puts details on random things, and from what I've heard and researched probably, either the bloody credit check from the estate agents got the address and the telephone was taken from the national thingy from Bulldog (the line and internet providers).

Now, as far as I can remember there is a way to put your name out of every database and list there is and actually sue anybody who calls you after 28 days of doing that! But I can't seem to find it anymore (did it in my last home and it was free btw). the preventiontregistry is paid so it's not that I believe...

Any ideas? Cause ok, the snail mail I can handle (for the moment at least), but the telephone calls are bloody annoying while I'm working here! :@

[vict0r]

Next time someone calls you, just scream and act like a madman!

[Vince Twelve]

When someone calls you to sell you something, tell them that you died.  If you really want to get into it, pretend you're a detective investigating your death and you want to get the name and address of the person calling.  Treat them like a suspect.  I've heard a tape of someone doing this and it was hilarious.

Alternatively, if you have a lot of free time, just see how long you can keep the caller on the phone without you buying anything.  Ask ridiculous questions, some of them personal.  Maybe tell them that you're selling a competing product and try to sell it to the caller.  They're probably being taped for job reviews, so they can't be rude.  If they interrupt you, tell them how rude they're being.  Ask to speak to their supervisor.  Then try to sell stuff to him.  If the caller has any sense, they'll cross your name off their company's list to prevent any one from having to go through that again.

With the snail mail, it usually will have a postage paid return envelope inside.  If you find one of these, put whatever inside... coupons, scraps of paper, small paper weights, then seal it and mail it back to the company.  They'll be paying for it.  See how long they'll keep it up!

If you turn unsolicited advertising into a game, it won't be annoying anymore!

[Tartalo]

Now, as far as I can remember there is a way to put your name out of every database

This "no-ads" list is different in each country, where are you now?

[Tuomas]

Usually when it's a phone salesman or that, I tell them about my perversions to magazines or what ever they're selling. The conversation usually gets pretty awkward then.

As for the snail mail, in here, it's enough that you add a sticker on your mailbox that says no snail mail please.

[Nikolas]

Now, as far as I can remember there is a way to put your name out of every database

This "no-ads" list is different in each country, where are you now?

UK, London.

Vince, indeed I would do that. Actually I ask them to *$£&%&* remove my name from the list and the promise to do it. Or that I'm dead busy and I hang up simply!

but I don't always have the time or the mood to go through this... If I could record though the phone class, like hell I would do it! Maybe I'll look into it then and publish the phone calls! hehe

[Ashen]

I've been looking into this recently, too. The best looking option I've found so far is this one. As far as I can see it's free, and they have a mail blocking service as well.

[Becky]

Yes, we're with the TPS.  They block pretty much all of our unsolicited calls that we suffered since moving in (obviously the previous occupant liked them!).

[Nikolas]

YES!

The TPS!

Thanks Ashen and Becky! That was what I was looking for but somehow google was unhelpful.

THANK YOU!

[voh]

Next time someone calls you, just scream and act like a madman!

I do that, actually. When someone calls, the following happens.

Me: "Speaking with [real name]"
Caller: "Good evening. Could I ask you some quest..."
Me: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
Caller: "Uhm, sir?"
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
*click*

And they never call back

[Tuomas]

I do that, actually. When someone calls, the following happens.

Me: "Speaking with [real name]"
Caller: "Good evening. Could I ask you some quest..."
Me: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
Caller: "Uhm, sir?"
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
*click*

And they never call back

Same thing with girls

[voh]

Well, then I don't go AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, more like MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM and if that creeps them out, then I don't want 'em!

[MrColossal]

When I was in college someone called my room and wanted me to buy something stupid and I said "This is a college dorm." and she said "Oh, I'm sorry, I'll remove you from our computers."

I wonder if they can't sell to college dorms? Give that a try!

Then just the other day someone called my house asking for the previous occupant [as they have been doing for 2.5 years! I don't know who Margret is!] and I told them that they're calling an apartment building and she said "Oh ok..." and hung up on me not the other way around..

However sometimes when I say "She doesn't live here anymore." they just start their hooplah on me but eh, can't win all the time.

[Quintaros]

One technique that is somewhat pleasing is to just put the phone down without hanging up.  Typically the caller talks so much that you can't get a word in edgewise so it can be several minutes before they realize that they have been talking to no one.   Come back in 15 minutes and chances are they have already hung up.

[esper]

My answering machine message (honestly):

[spoken with the voice of James Earl Jones]

"Hello. You have reached the phone number of (esper). Please call back when he's not sleeping or at work and he'll be glad to talk to you about whatever pointless trivialities you find necessary to cause him to endure. If you are a telemarketer, please leave your full name, home phone number, and the approximate time when you will be eating or preparing for bed at the beep. Thank you."

[shbaz]

Those postage paid envelopes can also be attached to much larger packages (up to 10 lbs. or some such) and mailed back full of rocks in the US.  That has to cost them at least $20, and they'll probably stop sending them or block you from doing it from your post office.  If they do the latter, you only need to use a different post office.  Of course, your mileage may vary with British law.

When I was in college someone called my room and wanted me to buy something stupid and I said "This is a college dorm." and she said "Oh, I'm sorry, I'll remove you from our computers."

I wonder if they can't sell to college dorms? Give that a try!

When I was in a college dorm credit card call-centers would phone at 8:30 am (long before I was usually awake then) and try to sign me up.  I'd tell them no, go back to bed, and 15 minutes later they'd call back.. and ask for my roommate.

Bastards.

A lot of times they would be foreign students who could barely speak English (the call center was in my college town, they would go number to number in the college phone directory).  Once I was halfway signed up before I realized who it was and what they were doing.

[Nine Toes]

If there is a UK equivalent of the US's Federal Trade Commission, check out their website.  Normally when a telemarketer or bill collector calls me repeatedly, I threaten to get the FTC involved, and they usually stop.

EDIT:

I'm not sure if these are the correct agencies, but here is The Office Of Fair Trading, and The Competition Commission.  I got them from the FTC's website, under International > Foreign Authorities.

[Helm]

I love these spam terrorism countermeasures. I usually when I get telemarketers start doing a feint panting while the seller talks, and up the volume as I go. Sometimes they ask 'sir, are you okay?' to which I reply in a small voice "Y-yes... keep going... you have a... nice voice".

They don't call again.

When they call and ask for the 'woman of the house' I tell them only men live in this house (which is true) and that 'we like it that way' (not exactly true).