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OFF COME THE TESTICLES!!!!!

I enjoy rapping a lot even though I'm not terribly good at it. Is that still open?

I read that as 'raping'

Exciting!  Sign me up for a voice acting audition, if you are still in need of "talent" (*cough* ).
      I too found the font hard to read, I suppose because it is a ttf font that's been resized?  It looks ok when I scale the screenshot back to 320x200.  I'm not sure how many people scale up these low-res games when playing (I do), so you might consider a different font.  If you're keeping this one, another issue is that the kerning (?) on the left side of the "L" is wrong: it bleeds into adjacent letters.
      ...But I realise this isn't the critics lounge: this looks like an exciting and fun-filled game.  Good luck!

I was able to download the game.  After struggling a bit with the interface (through random clicking I somehow managed to make the button disappear), I think I've at long last mastered the game.  I couldn't hear any sound, though, despite fiddling with the settings.  I liked how the timer re-e-a-l-l-y made it seem urgent to press the button. 

Sorry to hear, Snake.

My best friend ever was named Ky, and she was an amazing dog.  We'd romp all through the woods together, chasing deer and bears and whatever else we came across, and when I'd practice my band instrument she would just howl mournfully along with me. Whenever I went out drinking sure enough I'd wake up hung over, cuddling with her in bed (I'm pretty sure nothing happened.... ).  It was very tearful when she died.  On the way to bury her my brother and I found a mangy stub of an oak tree with two pitiful leaves in the middle of the snowmobile trail: it'd been run over who knows how many times, but it was still struggling on.  We ended up digging it up and transplanting it to mark her grave.  Now that little twig is about ten feet high and growing strong: it gives me great comfort to think it's Ky's constituent nutrients (...er, spirit?) that's driving it upwards.

can I use an old idea of mine that I never got around to writing?

As a member of the Thought Police, I hereby charge you with having a guilty conscience.  

Joking aside, I resurrect ideas all the time for these competitions.  I'm of the opinion that it would be slightly dishonest to submit something you've already written (even if it was previously unpublished, it would have been written without the immense pressure and time constraints of the FWC ), but I have no such qualms when it comes to just ideas.  So I give you my official endorsement as Contest Coordinator: make those long-disused ideas into a written reality!

[you must create two characters of opposite, conflicting or even incompatible temperament, and put them into a situation where they are stuck with each other]

Greetings Fortnightly Writing Competition participants,
     Your challenge for this round is character-based:  you must create two characters of opposite, conflicting or even incompatible temperament, and put them into a situation where they are stuck with each other.  Maybe they'll come to an understanding and appreciation of their mutual differences, maybe they'll discover that they are much stronger as a team when they combine their divergent skill set, or maybe they'll just end up hating and murdering each other: outcome doesn't matter as much to me as exploring the inevitable antagonism between vastly different characters.  Ideally your work would be in screen-play or stage-play format, but I'm not going to make it a requirement so long as your work is dialog driven (i.e. character is mostly revealed through verbal exchanges).
     As always, here are some ideas for the uninspired:

Genghis Khan and Stephen Hawking are stuck carpooling in a traffic jam

Joni Mitchell and Adolf Hitler have an awkward blind date

John Lennon and Cookie Monster are room mates quarrelling over the electricity bill

Ocean Spirit Dennis and James Bond are the sole survivors of a shipwreck on a deserted island

Ponch and Fran Drescher are in a hideous accident, but the doctors save them by fusing their bodies together

Really the possibilities are endless: have fun!  Deadline is midnight EDT February 28. 

I humbly accept your congratulations, and will try to have the next competition up and running by tonight. 

from a lowly 5th place...)

Hey, I voted for you.   

Keep up the good writing everybody, and I'm sure you'll eclipse me next time!

Yeah, I had no idea you guys held writing competitions too. That was great, I saw a lot of talent, but to me, Baron is the winner already (sorry guys, you did great, but he's my favorite).

I thank you for the strong endorsement, Janosbiro, but I learned long ago not to count my Writing Competition votes before the deadline lapses. 

On the other hand, you make a convincing argument and any remaining voters would be foolish not to vote for me as well. 

As for short fictions, except for this competition (which tends to be theme based, although not always) I'm not aware of any specific forum here.  If you're looking for critiques to improve your story then the Critics Lounge board is the perfect place.  Otherwise you could post on the General board (I've seen weirder stuff there, so it'd probably be ok), but I'm not sure how much attention it would get.  Likewise anything goes on the Rumpus board, but things can get pretty silly down there sometimes....   By far the most likely way to guarantee the attention of folks around here would be to build your writing into a game!  Even very short games can win a decent audience if they are deserving! 

Here in Grimdark, moustaches are taxed by the inch!

....and I'm back.  I had to force myself not to indulge my King Simulator 2013 addiction while I was cramming to put the finishing touches on a project, but now I'm free to waste time indulge in my passion once more.    

As for this "secret noble" paying handsomely business, the only motives I can think of for such an offer is that this fellow is involved in nefarious purposes.  Maybe he supported our brother's side during the revolution?  Maybe he's conspiring to assassinate Rorik?  Maybe he's running a meth lab in the back of his caravan?  I say it's our duty as the local strong-man to stick our noses in other people's business and tax them accordingly for the privilege.  Thus,

>> Order Lancelot to bring this noble before us, and command the Jester to make a list of those who await an audience.



Did you miss me?     

[Character:]

There were some impressive reads here, given the brevity of the entries.  I want to personally single out Stupot+, UnLady, and WHAM for chastisement: how dare you write so little and leave me hanging in suspense!  By the same token, Ghost's background world/Long Road begs to be fleshed out further.  I hate to assign votes when I'm still frustrated with all of you, but you leave me little choice:

Character:
Stupot+ (Although the character himself is hardly described, his thoughts and appearance through the environmental description paint a complex and intriguing picture).

Plot:
Stupot+ (How will Peck navigate and reconcile the dual worlds of hero-dom and murder suspect?  I must know!)
UnLady  (What ghost of Silent Nina's troubled past waits for her in the muted orange glow of the hard city streets?  I must know!)
CaptainD (Who is Yssan and why is his mind betraying his conscience?  What is the terrible secret of the realm of Akolanthia?  I must know!)

Atmosphere:
CaptainD (The conflict of the mind -"the memories, the dreams… I couldn't deny them" and the horror of torture to come create strong emotional intensity)
UnLady (Muffled sounds, unpleasant smells, and a vaguely glowing world create a suspenseful feeling of otherworldliness)
WHAM (The desperation conveyed by the desolation of the Finnish apocalypse gave me a feeling of dread menace)

Background World:
Ghost (intriguing backdrop of the semi-afterlife)
UnLady (the smells and sounds of a half-seen world)
Stupot+ (how objects not necessarily part of the story -couple, taxi, notebook, the weather - drive the narrative: it's the background world telling the story).

Word Choice/Style:
WHAM (It seems I always vote WHAM for the way he puts words together: "the crunch of snow underfoot seemed to echo and roar like thunder" -perfect.)
CaptainD ("They were coming.  Again." -Your descriptions were good, and I love how these two short sentences/fragments invoke a simple but powerful terror)

Connection:
Ghost (The motives of the main character connect intriguingly with the backdrop/plot described in the blurb)
Stupot+ (The action of the first paragraph flows flawlessly into the broader plot)
WHAM (I liked how you conveyed the unknowability of what was really going on in the chaos of the apocalypse, using it as a theme to link the action in your first chapter to the blurb).

Well, I'm a bit slow off the mark, but I finally got around to playing this.  The mood created by the background art and music was striking, some of the puzzles were quite inspired (hotel lobby, broom closet), and the plot was intriguing and suspenseful.  And you made fun of the French, which means bonus marks!   If I had to pick the best bang-for-buck improvement it would be tightening the dialog a little.  Yes, there is a lot of plot to convey for a short game (no doubt due to your episodic ambitions) and a lot of character to establish (don't cut the hilarious bits!), but it seemed like too much at times.  Overall it was good, though: I look forward to seeing where you take the series!

[Chapter One]

Web of the Black Widow
Chapter One
   
   Sir Lionel of Beauchamps rode proudly through the Forest of Cray, the late-spring sunlight dappling the steel flanks of his armour so that he shone like an angel of the Righteous God himself.  His bright white stallion strutted more than trotted over the potholes and branches of the seldom used Forest Road, the nuisance of the effort revealing itself only in the animal's haughty sneer.  Behind rode John Brownlips, a gentleman of many sycophantic talents who served as both squire and troubadour to the shining knight.  At present he was composing a song relating the valiance of the great Sir Lionel on this very quest.  He sang:

    “Through the savage wooded lands
      The brave hero charged unswervingly
         To the rescue of such maiden fair,
      The flawless beauty Athesley.”

   Sir Lionel gave the signal to halt, squinting through the wooded fastness of Cray, a forest infamous for its false paths and deceptive twists.  Yet the birds still sung cheerfully to the rhythm of the whispering leaves overhead, signalling that there was yet no danger upon them.  Sir Lionel frowned.  “Flawless beauty?  I rather thought her a matronly figure the one time we met.”
   John Brownlips plucked the strings of his lute in contemplation.  “Delicate rose?” he suggested.
   Sir Lionel was too well bred to chuckle aloud, but he could feel the sensation twitching inside of him nonetheless.  “If I recall correctly, she is a crone-faced scold that could take paint off the wall with her tongue,” he stated definitively.
   John continued at his strings in thought.  “Dutiful grandmother?” he offered at length.
   Sir Lionel shook his head solemnly.  “No, she's only 19,” he sighed.
   A string snapped discordantly on the lute.  “Begging your pardon, milord,” John Brownlips began knavishly, “but why pray would we be riding through the Uncouth God's own middens heap to rescue such a lady?”
   Sir Lionel straightened in his saddle.  “Because her family is rich, you twit.  Never mind about the lady, just focus on me.”
   John Brownlips bowed in the saddle.  “But of course, milord.”  He busied himself with replacing the broken lute string while Sir Lionel tried to get his bearings.  To John Brownlips Sir Lionel looked the very epitome of chivalry, with a strong chiseled jaw and piercing eyes.  He held his head nobly aloft so that his well-groomed hair flapped like a blond pennon over his broad shoulders.  Who could get ever get enough of Sir Lionel the knight in song?
   â€œThree furlongs past the hoary oak along the forest path,” Sir Lionel quoted, starting forward once more.  “There is a cottage wherein the Lady we do hath.  That's what the ransom note said, although I suppose the churls that left it might not have measured the distance out so carefully, given their patently weak grasp of common grammar and poetic style.  What do you make it past the hoary oak, man?”
   But John Brownlips was still daydreaming about the primped perfection of Sir Lionel's golden locks.
   â€œNo matter,” Sir Lionel continued.  "It cannot be far down-”
   And then the ground gave way beneath his steed, and Sir Lionel disappeared into the darkness.



Back of Book Blurb

   Grunbald the Snatch was the typical middle-aged she-dwarf: buxom, bejewelled, and bearded.  But the normalcy of her appearance masked a quite abnormal appetite: capturing and seducing the handsomest men of the realm.  Filled with self-loathing at her own depravity, she is suddenly offered redemption when a song about her passionate affections becomes a sensational hit throughout the land.  Now Grunbald must adapt to the baffling condition of fame, while coyly dodging the legions of lustful fans who flock to her wooded redoubt.  Will she come to terms with who she really is in time to find true love, or will she allow the medieval minstrel media to goad her into becoming an even greater monster?
   
   
   

OMG! I can't believe we share both AGS AND Elvis passions! I too have a weekend Elvis reunion since 2003!
I was Best Sideburn 2007 March and September awards and won a Pot Belly Decade Award last year!

The world is a funny place...

Miguel, I think you and I were destined to make beautiful art together.  If only you weren't so intent on cutting off testicles for the slightest infractions of your moral code....

After releasing Chalkman (Feb 2013) I thought I should probably pay more attention to my heavily pregnant wife. But fuelled by adrenalin and coffee from just completing my first game, I couldn't resist re-making The Block in AGS 3.2.1. It only took two weeks to complete! What a rush! Better than sex (which I wasn't getting much of anyway).

I'm sensing a theme emerging here:

1) Family takes away AGS time, but at the same time focusses what time remains. 

2) Sex and AGS don't mix, but they can be equally stimulating in a thrilling erotic kind of way. 

3) Struggling with mixed-emotions over an ex (that is, and uncompleted project ) is normal and probably healthy.  Sometimes you want to get back together with your ex, but she's all like "You abandoned me!" and your all like "Don't be like that, Baby!  I still love you!" and then you go back to theme #2....

Now let's see if the evolution of Ponch plays out along the same lines.

The only unsolicited comment I ever received about the game is in the AGS database, and it perfectly sums up Bolt Action's positives and negatives.

Who is this Andy guy, anyway?  He was also one of the only three guys to rate AL-Quest 1 a decade ago.  That kind of longevity and dedication to playing unproven authors deserves more recognition.  We should start an Andy appreciation thread to try to draw him out of the woodwork.

We joined at the same time more or less, Baron. A decade?
Interesting read indeed.

AGS has been a constant background hum to my adult life.  Sometimes during the intensity of development it has filtered to the forefront, but usually jobs, family and life have taken priority.  And yet, jobs come and go, family and life evolve: my life now is vastly different than it was a decade ago, and yet AGS seems like a changeless anchor in a sea of flux.  If not for AGS and the Elvis impersonation society to which I also belong, I fear I would have no sense of grounding whatsoever!

I went back to being disillusioned and unmotivated to do any game development. I took a step back from AGS, I have a son that will be two years old in a few months. I have priorities.

You and I are in the same boat.  Or at least very similar looking boats with very similar passengers....   Family comes first, of course.  But if you're dealing with toddlers for any length of time, I know you appreciate your few outlets outside of child-rearing.  So enjoy your game-making-puttering, and I look forward to when you jump back into the point-and-click saddle.

S-Dawg!  You be ridin' in the hood again, Bruddah?!?  Props!

Well, the project is pretty much done.  Thanks for all contributions!  If anyone is an amateur hip-hop artist interested in doing an AGS song for the game, see the revised OP (above) for details.  Otherwise, look forward to the release!

Well, apparently there's been a delay in the release of Bake Sale 2 -some sort of malfunction with the bundling equipment, I guess.  Anyway, this delay, while disappointing, also provides an opportunity to add more features!  I'm interested in an AGS rap/hip-hop song for a bridge sequence that I had to cut from the original plan due to lack of time/ability.  Are there any hip-hop artists out there in AGS-land that might consider picking this up?  We'd collaborate on the lyrics, but the vocal performance/music would be entirely up to you.  The game would probably only need a 30 second track.  Actual hip-hop skill isn't nearly as important as enthusiasm.   Post here or PM me if you're interested/intrigued.