Messages

It was nasty but it was constructive all the same. Finding a completely inoffensive way to point out so many flaws is easier said than done, and more trouble than it's worth. Usually I keep quiet if I can't say the right thing, but occasionally I feel there are things that must be said and I go for it.

I don't fully recall, but I'm guessing from what you said that you did the BLAM thing (whose name I also don't remember). I did not mean to imply failure on your part, because your goal was to create a sadistic psychological experiment, and you did it well; it was really creepy, confusing, nonsensical, disturbing and shocking, and it was obviously supposed to be. Especially at the end when you realize you've actually shot yourself while tripping. To say that the creator of Escape has accidentally outdone you while trying to make a proper game is not meant to malign your effort.

So, yeah, anyway. I did say sorry. My intent was not to stop anybody making games. Everybody's first try is going to be a clunker to some extent. My choice was between (1) they don't find out what's wrong with the game, don't learn anything, and therefore make games that aren't any better, or (2) their games improve, assuming they aren't so fragile as to be destroyed by criticism. And if they were the type to give up at the first sign of trouble, I don't think they would have finished a game in the first place.

To its credit, the game somehow held my interest enough to make me endure all those shortcomings and keep playing to the end, which is more than I can say for some other games. If I didn't see potential, I probably wouldn't have bothered to say a damned thing.

[The ability to quit or restore is disabled for two minutes]

I won the game, but I don't feel like I've solved a puzzle; I just feel dirty for for being stubborn enough to try every stupid thing until finding the stupidest.

Sorry, but there is so much wrong with this game that I strongly suspect it's bad on purpose. At the risk of hurting your feelings, I'm going to list them all in the hopes that you learn something. This might resemble a walkthrough but I can't find it in my soul to treat it as "spolier."

1. The first "puzzle" is the interface. After determining that I couldn't use the bowl on anything, I finally caught on to the idea that even though my cursor was an inventory item, clicking it on something was the wrong way, and only a right-click would work. Even after figuring this out, I wasn't fully trained, and kept using the wrong mouse button throughout the game.

2. So I've got a translator in my inventory. Can I use it on things? No. It's automatic, which seems convenient, but I confess that the first thing I did was I try to use it on the alien writing. I was confused when it didn't work. Oh, I see, if I just look at the writing, it will tell me what it says.

3. So the game basically railroads me to the end, telling me I only have one choice at any point. Hmm, when I find out my key card doesn't work in the escape pod, I can't leave again and go find the right key card.

4. So I click stuff, and surprise, I'm dead. The ability to quit or restore is disabled for two minutes while the pointlessly slow credit sequence rolls by.

5. The big "puzzle" is I'm supposed to be a stubborn idiot and keep trying to go somewhere when the game keeps telling me I don't need to go there anymore. I forgave Douglas Adams for this annoying stunt in Infocom's HHGttG because he can get away with a lot just for being Douglas Adams, but you are not.

6. Whee, I get a four-digit keycode. Perhaps it leads to the other ending; I never found a way to use it. After finding this information, the keycard I got from my first imaginary journey through the ship doesn't work in the elevator, even though it should.

7. Only at this point, the game tells me "You remember hearing the aliens talk about an escape pod on Level 1." That must explain why I find the escape pod on Level 2, and I'm not allowed to go to Level 1 because it's not where I want to go. (Maybe if I try for Level 1 a hundred times despite being told not to, it will relent and descibe me going there, running around, and jumping out an airlock... but I didn't have the patience to try it. Anyway, I can't use the elevator at this point.)

8. I can't take another imaginary trip to the left anymore, no matter how many times I try. Not until after I go into the vent again for no reason, that is. This makes no sense.

9. So I get to the escape pod again with my new and improved keycard, and I still can't use it in the slot. It does nothing. Remember that I've been conditioned to not want to simply right-click the slot with the cursor, because every time I've done that previously, I have to helplessly sit through the credits again before starting over. But I do it anyway, because kicking the machine in frustration is what I really feel like doing now. Surprise, that's how you use the keycard! I win, and still must sit through the no-quit-allowed credits again before getting on with my life.

Other amateur game makers don't have the expertise to make a game this bad. This was the most sadistic psychological experiment I've ever played, including that "BLAM" thing.

All of us working together might make it through this game. I've taken the first step toward making a fire in the cave, but beyond that I can't do anything but walk around and look at things.

Interesting so far, but can you at least hint at how I'm supposed to combine these two numbers?

I toughed it out and figured out what to do. Pretty clever.

By the way, the dead guard still gets up and talks to you if you try to flirt with her. Also, looking at the tree in the top of the building gives you the message you would expect from shooting at the door.