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Life, the universe and everything (You guys are requesting these faster than I can write them! XD)

It's incredibly vital it's true
Of utmost importance to you
The answer to life
All our troubles and strife
What is it? Of course! 42.

For when you multiply six by nine
The answer you get is just fine
Well, according to Dent
But then maybe he meant
To say seven instead of the sign.

So Deep Thought so clever and strong
Came up with an answer that's wrong
But we'll just never know
If it's meant to be so
So let's just all go and play Pong!

Dildo in the dishwasher...hmm. Okay, let's do this.

It just sat there all purple and long
An object of poem and song
In my dishwashing box
Lay the king of all cocks
The world's largest vibrating dong.

I wasn't sure how it got there
And it looked to be covered in hair
What a sickening thought
In my stomach, a knot
So I just went and sat in a chair.

Well it just disappeared in the end
My veined purple pulsating friend
But perhaps if I yearn
It'll someday return
And JESUS could that bugger bend.

I accept your challenge with all the airs and graces of a hippo wearing clogs!

*ahem*

He held on to his favourite teddy
As his good bowling arm he made steady
He had a good grip
And his windup was hip
The Bowl Armadillo was ready.

He attracted a curious stare
From the odd passer-by who went there
He cared not for their kind
There were strikes on his mind
He was down to a split, what a pair!

So he stood straight and proud, he stood tall
For his one final shot in the hall
Then some cad drunk on beer
Rolled him into a sphere
And then used the poor sap as a ball.

If you're into parser games with horrible graphics check out the Hugo House of Horror series. They're not bad games but some of the puzzles can be a bit contrived and they're not really "horror" per se. Just though I'd throw them out there.

For many years now I've been fascinated - nay, enthralled - by the subtle nuances of the English language and the myriad opportunities it affords for wordplay. To that end, I've ever been a particular fan of the humble limerick, and so I offer this.

Give me any topic in this...uh, topic. Any topic at all, and I will create a triple limerick based on it. That is to say three limericks about the same thing. For example, if someone were to say "Do a limerick about pink polkadot elephants!" I would perhaps submit the following:

They're certainly not grey robots
And they aren't green rectangular pots
They're not tiny worms
They are huge pachyderms
Which are pink and all covered in dots.

They only exist in your head
And they probably fill you with dread
If you walk out your door
You will find three or four
And there's seven of them in your bed.

So what's to be done, do you know?
Against this imaginary foe
If you just don't believe
They'll all turn round and leave
Then they'll only exist in dumbo.

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No idea how popular this'll be, if anyone replies at all, but if you like the idea then by all means post! Post post post! Now! Yeah, I'm talking to you! *points*

You know too much and must be terminated.

Here's my entry.

"Hero"

He could remember it like it was yesterday.

The cheering of the crowd, rising from a deathly quiet to a deafening crescendo; the adrenaline surging through his body as his foot connected with the ball and it rocketed towards the undefended corner of the net; the glory that only winning a world cup final can provide.

He sighed contentedly, replaying the scene over and over in his head, a huge smile lightning up his face as he repeatedly experienced the high of his victory. Could anything be more sweet?

He thought back further - the day when he first announced to his parents that he wanted to be a football when he grew up, allowing himself a private chuckle at his childish error. His first training session, his first match. In a matter of moments he relived it all.

His reverie was interrupted by the arrival of a pretty young woman. He'd been taken with her for a while, but couldn't work up the courage to ask her if she was seeing anyone. Instead, he decided he would tell her the story of his amazing triumph.

"Regina! You'll never guess what I did yesterday!"

Regina smiled sadly at the confused, bed-ridden old man in front of her, and sat by his bedside to hear the story, just like she did every day.

Me, similarly kilted as SSH was for my sister's wedding:

Hi there. I've already made 8 posts and probably should have introduced myself first, but I'm still a newbie so...

My name's Trihan and I'm an alcoholic.

...what do you mean I'm in the wrong - ohhhh.

My name's Trihan, real name John Paul Clifford, and I'll be 24 years old on the 25th of January. I've been into game design and creation since about 1996 in some way or other (though I only seriously started with the technical aspect in 2000)

I was born in Germany in 1985 and moved to Scotland when I was about 1 and a half (my dad's in the RAF so I'm still Scottish). I'm a customer service advisor for the Carlton bingo club in Elgin, Scotland, which basically means I call numbers, cashier, sell books and various other bingo-type things.

I agree with Michigami that the entrance exam is a welcome addition. It's something every online community should do!

I like to split things into paragraphs, just in case you hadn't noticed.

I'm into video games (obviously), humour (maybe not so obvious), anime, Heroes, reading, writing, drawing, spriting, composing music, listening to music, horse riding, shopping, cross stitch...and yeah, I'm a guy.

Currently working on four projects (as you can see from my ultra high-tech sig). When I say "working on" I mean I'm at the stage where things pass through my head and I think "Hey, that'd be pretty cool in project <Z>" but I don't really have much in the way of actual work on any of them. (1 AGS game, 1 RPG and 2 novels). I'm a ridiculous perfectionist and tend to scrap anything I make because I don't think it's as good as it could be. I'm getting better, though!

Anyway, that's me in a nutshell. Well actually me in a nutshell would be more like "Help! I'm trapped in a nutshell! Someone save me!" but I digress. It's lovely to meet you all and hopefully you'll be seeing a lot more of me around here. Or hopefully not in your case.

I gave him a bit more of a left arm, although given the pose the sprite is in if it were ever used for anything it would obviously be intended to be leaning against a wall, making it a moot point. I also removed the light pixels beside his eyes, changed the colour to a slightly less bright one to make them seem smaller, and took a little of the face highlight out. I also lightened his mouth to make it less harsh.

Okay, this time it's voice clips. I recorded myself doing a few lines in various accents for your perusal and subsequent shred-ripping. A few things before I open the floor up:

My best accents by far are Scottish, English and Irish. My Welsh in this clip is terrible, my American isn't great, but I'm pretty proud of Australian. I know it says Jamaican in my profile as well but it's quite late at night and I'm intentionally being quieter than I could otherwise be while recording to avoid embarrassment. I'll put up some better ones tomorrow or Sunday.

If anyone is impressed with my work and wants to use me for voiceovers, or even if you just want to hear what I sound like reading a particular line in a particular accent (not limited to the ones listed, I'm always willing to try something new so go wild) just give me the line, character reading it, and desired accent and I'll do my best to give you a sample of what I'm capable of. Now here are the clips!

Scottish
Irish
Welsh
American
Australian

Note that the Scottish clip is using a Glaswegian accent. I can also do milder Scots and Sean Connery-esque speech.

Edit: Also, here's one of my unfinished RPG themes (for a boss battle). I'll put it in here instead of making a new topic.

Serpentine Clash

paolo: I gave your suggestion a shot with the first one:



Any better?

Edited first post with a new attempt.

Okay, here's my next attempt at spriting, using a photograph as a reference. Here's the photo I used:



And here's my really pathetic attempt at spriting him, at 1x and 4x:



I'm aware of most of the glaring flaws. I don't have a very good grasp of shading with sprites this small, and there's no detail in the face. I couldn't really figure out how to get any real detail in there. Any comments, criticism, requests for my deportation and dismemberment, death threats, marriage proposals or random poetry are, as always, welcome.

But go easy on me, this is the first sprite I've really done "by myself" in years.

Edit: And now that I think about it, it's entirely possible that I made the sprite -too- small by not realising that the background I compared him to wouldn't be the same size in-game as it is in the editor... oh well. Feel free to comment on my tiny sprite while I make one that's actually a normal size.

Edit: Here's my latest attempt. It's a bit bigger and more detailed. I'm still not all that hot with shading, but I think it's an improvement. The face looks horrible, I couldn't figure out how to salvage it so maybe you guys can give me some pointers. (As a challenge to myself I limited it to 16 colours for this version)

The Invader Zim part was more my (desired) graphical style and the wacky sidekick angle. Also, it's not quite normal even from the beginning. The first puzzle involves getting out of the janitor's closet by blowing up the door.

Okay, so I've taken my first little tiny baby steps into the scary world of pixel art once again, and thanks to a couple of wonderful tutorials by luckylinx and Spaarghy on DeviantArt I've churned a few out, and then I had a go at a couple of my own design. Basically I just want some feedback on the colours I used (I pretty much suck at choosing palettes right now and probably have some issues with saturation), which shading "style" looks best and whether the two I did by myself are any good. So without further ado, let the emoticon parade begin! (All are posted at 1x and 4x)

I'm not sure if it's appropriate to post in this thread this long after the last reply, but given that it's a sticky and I won't be bumping it I guess it's not a problem.

Anyway, I have more or less the same problem as rock_chick. I used to be a fairly decent artist but through lack of practice I can't even draw a circle any more, let alone do a proper sketch on paper. Does anyone know of a way to practice and improve pixel art skills when you lack the basic tools of the trade and can't really afford them? Pixelling on a budget, if you will. There are loads of tutorials out there but none of them really give you a true step-by-step "do this along with me!" approach, which I think would be immensely useful.

Okay, I've had this idea brewing in my head for a couple of years now, and I would dearly love to be able to make it a reality. I'm currently trying desperately to improve graphically or hire someone to do graphics for me (preferably the former, I like being self-sufficient) but that's a moot point and not at all what this topic is about. So let's get to the meat and potatoes of this thing, shall we?

Basically what I have in mind is a wacky character-centric game in a similar style to Day of the Tentacle about a laid-back, procrastinating schoolkid called Jeff who, as a result of accidentally locking himself in the school late at night, uncovers a plot by the government to demolish his hometown to make room for the world's largest car park.

He's not alone in this endeavour, however! Earlyish in the game he will encounter, and subsequently join forces with, a wisecracking talking rooster named Harold. A great lover of practical jokes and sarcastic retorts, and one hell of a guitar player.

Together (although their relationship is more love/hate than friendly at first) they must gather clues and evidence involving various key government figures and ultimately stop their plan before they're made homeless.

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I don't exactly have a full game script laid out here or anything, but I've put a great deal of thought into both characters and how they will interact with the world (and each other). Some of my inspirations and references will be pretty obvious (Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, the aforementioned Day of the Tentacle, Beneath a Steel Sky and Invader Zim to name but a few). Don't ask me where I got the idea of Harold playing guitar. I just figured it'd be a suitable silly thing for a rooster to be capable of.

Feel free to make all and any critiques, suggestions, words of praise on my ingenuity and obviously superior wordplay skills, and/or death threats. It's all welcome! And ladies, I'm single. Form an orderly queue, please.