heretic comic

[KiraHaraReturns]

Inspired by video games like heretic and hexen I started to draw a comic. I have no idea where the story is going to. If you have an idea you can share it here with me.

[Mandle]

Lovely artwork!!!

But to be completely honest, and maybe it's just because I'm not used to the style, I found the stylish, overlapping "panels" rather confusing.

I had to read through three times to understand who was who and what exactly was happening.

Maybe it's also the fact that everyone is hooded and not introduced through any exposition.

Also: I have no idea what those orc things are or if they are present in the room at the time or just an image of this coming war in the leader's mind.

If you need to have read "Heretic" to understand the style and story then just ignore everything I just said, because I have not.

But if you want the work to stand alone then maybe, and only in my opinion, a more structured classic "panel" layout and a bit more exposition is needed...

Best of luck, and I will be following this interesting project!

[Retro Wolf]

I think the classic panel layout is there, just that the white bars have been erased.
Awesome artwork!

[Mandle]

I think the classic panel layout is there, just that the white bars have been erased.

Yeah, I get that you still read it in the same order as if the white borders were there, but without them and with the frames flowing into each other I find myself having to spend time thinking about which way the story is flowing and what appears in each scene, instead of just naturally following the story...

For example: In the bottom part of the last page it took me a while to figure out that the bishop had had his throat cut by the jumping guy...Maybe it's not completely inked in yet, but it looks like both scenes are happening within the same space to me...

If I read a graphic novel I expect all of this to be self-evident and just be able to leap from frame to frame in intuitive instants that it would take a text-only novel paragraphs to describe. This is what I admire as the advantage of a graphic novel over a text novel...

Maybe I'm just old and too used to the classic structure, though...

[Danvzare]

It looks nice, and personally, I like the paneling.
The dialog seems a bit... off though. It doesn't sound right. For example, when the guy says "humbug" or the entire thought bubble on the last panel of the last page. It just doesn't match the artstyle, perceived time period, and tone of the comic.

[KiraHaraReturns]

@ Mandle
thank you for pointing out some critique. Making a comic page readable is not as easy as I thought especially because I'm strictly refusing to use frames. And it's an interesting aspect you mantioned about the "orcs", they are not in the same room, otherwise they had to be some midgets or tiny imps and yes, you are right, it's not that obvious because nobody knows, what I have had in mind while depicting this scene.

@Danvzare
any language and text improvements would be appropriate because, as you can conlclude, I'm not a native speaker, and I tried to write in archaic english without proper knowledge about even modern english.

[Cassiebsg]

I'm an avid comic reader (been reading comics since before I could even read them!) and have no problem following the story arc and flow. Lovely art and I actually like the no paneling as it gives it more dynamic and fast pace!
However, like Danvzare points out, I end up struggling with reading and following the text. Not sure if it it's the words in it self, or just the font style... or maybe both?