Insult competition, Sunny Penguin vs Baron! Vote now!

[Andail]

Check this thread for info:
http://www.adventuregamestudio.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=49139.0

SUNNY PENGUIN VERSUS BARON

Let the insulting begin.
The penguin is first out to deliver his post-o-insultativeness!!

[kaput]

Pff, Baron? More like Nellie Farren. Old, cold and dead. Lying in your bed barely fed after the gigolo fled.

Like your jokes. I'd have to toke more than a burger guzzling fat bloke to even go for broke and listen to your boke.

Croak, you think you got what it takes to get me back? Spout a loadda bullcrap like you got the clap? Trust me, you won't bust me, you're rusty, like crusty or old trusty. Come on fool, try and joust me.

(Sorry lol)

Edit by Andail: As long as we're not editing after the other reply, we're fine.

[Baron]

Pff, Baron? More like Nellie Farren. Old, cold and dead. Lying in your bed barely fed after the gigolo fled.

A Penguin instead?  Tux-ed, but unwed?  Waddle-dance for bread?  Flapping anchovy in the head?

Like your jokes. I'd have to toke more than a burger guzzling fat bloke to even go for broke and listen to your boke.

On fish you choke, your tongue sticky as coke, and your penguin eggs all have smelly green yolk!

Croak, you think you got what it takes to get me back? Spout a loadda bullcrap like you got the clap? Trust me, you won't bust me, you're rusty, like crusty or old trusty. Come on fool, try and joust me.

Your breath is gusty (and a little musty), but where's the steel behind the squall?
Jousting knight?  All bark, no bite.  A little girl's prammed plush penguin doll!

[kaput]

A Penguin instead?  Tux-ed, but unwed?  Waddle-dance for bread?  Flapping anchovy in the head?

Wha-wha-what it iz, beeeatch! Try to slam my tux, that's rich! I might waddle-waddle but you glitch! Yo' can't tell me that lil' badge stitch on ya chest don't itch? 

On fish you choke, your tongue sticky as coke, and your penguin eggs all have smelly green yolk!

Baron, you must be loc-o. Ya got big ass toes like Frodo, with a lil' Sam mustache on there covered in snow that failed to grow. Wow! Someone aught to give you a rope tow to bring you back from the down low. Like van gogh, i'mma bring back the status quo and call you out, bro.

Your breath is gusty (and a little musty), but where's the steel behind the squall?
Jousting knight?  All bark, no bite.  A little girl's prammed plush penguin doll!

All right now, I'll take the ball. Before I show you my squall you better crawl, cause I'mma end this brawl and I don't even need to wear a two-bit monocle at all!

[Baron]

Wha-wha-what it iz, beeeatch! Try to slam my tux, that's rich! I might waddle-waddle but you glitch! Yo' can't tell me that lil' badge stitch on ya chest don't itch?

Which itch?  My kitsch hitch is attached with an iron stitch b-
Itching is for black & white bowling pins in wallpaper suits.  With flightless parachutes and flatulent glutes!

Baron, you must be loc-o. Ya got big ass toes like Frodo, with a lil' Sam mustache on there covered in snow that failed to grow. Wow! Someone aught to give you a rope tow to bring you back from the down low. Like van gogh, i'mma bring back the status quo and call you out, bro.

Van Gough had one more ear than you! And where're your feathers, you bald yahoo!
Are your pants at your ankles to show the view?  Or do you waddle like that 'cause you're pinching a poo?

All right now, I'll take the ball. Before I show you my squall you better crawl, cause I'mma end this brawl and I don't even need to wear a two-bit monocle at all!

That monocle is a sign of class.  But then you couldn't read a sign if you saw a shaft of light at mass.
Your walnut sized brain is as fast as melted glass, except when scheming to pass some crass gas!

[kaput]

Which itch?  My kitsch hitch is attached with an iron stitch b-
Itching is for black & white bowling pins in wallpaper suits.  With flightless parachutes and flatulent glutes!

All right now, Baron, that's real cute. But lemme let you in on the square root of this dispute. Incase it didn't compute, I don't give a hoot! I'm the mutha-fuggin PENGUIN and you ain't nothin' but a sour old citrus fruit! I'ma take my boot, line you up, shine you up, and send you on the old world coot special bus route!

Van Gough had one more ear than you! And where're your feathers, you bald yahoo!
Are your pants at your ankles to show the view?  Or do you waddle like that 'cause you're pinching a poo?

Now it's time to shine the old mirror at you. Perhaps this old man's bitten off more than he can chew? Must be hard what with the false teeth and all. With all ya' lil' fanboys like yo' some Ron Paul. It's tragic, yall probably still believe in magic, it's graphic, but I'mma shove ya rotten body in the attic!

That monocle is a sign of class.  But then you couldn't read a sign if you saw a shaft of light at mass.
Your walnut sized brain is as fast as melted glass, except when scheming to pass some crass gas!

I see, so yall gotta be crass, hiding behind a monocle that's made outta glass. It's your last chance, it's yo' slow dance, so yall better advance with more than manic romance!

[Baron]

All right now, Baron, that's real cute. But lemme let you in on the square root of this dispute. Incase it didn't compute, I don't give a hoot! I'm the mutha-fuggin PENGUIN and you ain't nothin' but a sour old citrus fruit! I'ma take my boot, line you up, shine you up, and send you on the old world coot special bus route!

Citrus fruit?  You belly scoot!  Who can commute in a prostrate salute?
You slide like a sledge: clean the ice by belly dredge!  With your beak-pointy edge you're like a zebra door wedge!

Now it's time to shine the old mirror at you. Perhaps this old man's bitten off more than he can chew? Must be hard what with the false teeth and all. With all ya' lil' fanboys like yo' some Ron Paul. It's tragic, yall probably still believe in magic, it's graphic, but I'mma shove ya rotten body in the attic!

Age before beauty, but that leaves you right out....  You lout, all you do is shout-pout your brain-drought!
Sure there's snow on my roof, but my basement is humming!  All you do is squid-gumming, rum-bumming and down-dumbing!
I'm a wholesale hale male!  You flail when you fail with your tail in a whale!

I see, so yall gotta be crass, hiding behind a monocle that's made outta glass. It's your last chance, it's yo' slow dance, so yall better advance with more than manic romance!

My manic romance has the ladies all flocking!  Your hooting and screeching has them all balking!
And squawking away!  And docking astray!  They'd rather be lip-locking with a schlocking ashtray!

[kaput]

Citrus fruit?  You belly scoot!  Who can commute in a prostrate salute?
You slide like a sledge: clean the ice by belly dredge!  With your beak-pointy edge you're like a zebra door wedge!

Le'me sweep my pointy beak through this rubbish like a dredge. And salute you cause that suits you as you so allege, sucka... I may slide on the ground, you need a stick to get around! What?! you find that pointy phalis hat in lost and found???

Age before beauty, but that leaves you right out....  You lout, all you do is shout-pout your brain-drought!
Sure there's snow on my roof, but my basement is humming!  All you do is squid-gumming, rum-bumming and down-dumbing!
I'm a wholesale hale male!  You flail when you fail with your tail in a whale!

What kind of warm blooded male wears pointy shoulder pads? I ought to stick you and then kick you right between the nads, cluck-AH! But I'd hate to get my foot to get lost in that old-Jack-Frost, what with that saggy-baggy salad that you regularly toss?! BOOM!

My manic romance has the ladies all flocking!  Your hooting and screeching has them all balking!
And squawking away!  And docking astray!  They'd rather be lip-locking with a schlocking ashtray!

I'll break it down now, Baron, cause I let you have your way. Comparing my squawking beak to an ol' ashtray??? I'll admit I have the odd puff cause I love the way it feels. But chicks be squealing while your dealing on your MEALS ON WHEELS, grampy!

[Baron]

Le'me sweep my pointy beak through this rubbish like a dredge. And salute you cause that suits you as you so allege, sucka... I may slide on the ground, you need a stick to get around! What?! you find that pointy phalis hat in lost and found???

The only stick I use to get around puts my phallic hat to shame, while between the flippers you are lame (ask any penguin dame)!
I'm a first-class lover, the ladies say on my approach; your lovin' rates somewhere between hobo-boxcar and coach!

What kind of warm blooded male wears pointy shoulder pads? I ought to stick you and then kick you right between the nads, cluck-AH! But I'd hate to get my foot to get lost in that old-Jack-Frost, what with that saggy-baggy salad that you regularly toss?! BOOM!

My lapels show my rank, and they're really quite swank.  My nads are the wheel-tracks on my impervious tank!
Have a kick: break your foot!  That rubbery webbed thing: like walking on a fly-swatter... clap-clap-clap-clap-sting!

I'll break it down now, Baron, cause I let you have your way. Comparing my squawking beak to an ol' ashtray??? I'll admit I have the odd puff cause I love the way it feels. But chicks be squealing while your dealing on your MEALS ON WHEELS, grampy!

Chicks love a guy with a car who is buyin'!  Not a slimy wet avian who's ice-water swims they ain't tryin'!
Play it like me and then you'll hear some oh-myin'!  Stick to your sick shtick and you'll just leave 'em cryin'!
....unless it's them sassy elephant porpoise seals you're a-spyin', in which case you'll be joinin' in on the eye dryin'!

[kaput]

The only stick I use to get around puts my phallic hat to shame, while between the flippers you are lame (ask any penguin dame)!
I'm a first-class lover, the ladies say on my approach; your lovin' rates somewhere between hobo-boxcar and coach!

Yo' got it twisted now, Baron, don't encroach on my reproach! Yall be crawling like a grimey awful-rhymey-cockroach! Yo' might think I don't respect because I walk on webbed feet, but don't be sinking into thinking that I ain't from tha' street! I'm a simple ladies man, I don't need a 'shlocking' plan! I just pass my pen laid eggs from mamma-to-gran, pluck-ah? This penguin's got a member that'll take out your eyes, duck!  I'm the real-deal, Baron, all us penguins the same, shmuck! So don't go bustin' where you're hustlin' cause it's all just in vain! Yo' might be somewhat confused because of tight helmet-to-brain!

My lapels show my rank, and they're really quite swank.  My nads are the wheel-tracks on my impervious tank!
Have a kick: break your foot!  That rubbery webbed thing: like walking on a fly-swatter... clap-clap-clap-clap-sting!

What is thing now, Baron? Yo' just think that you're the king? Like some ho yo' like a yoyo on an infinity string! YO!... Yall humans all consuming to the point of extinction! I wish that I was lying but this shtick is far from such fiction! I might not be the balance right in the palace of peace, but I don't kill what I don't need to have a morsel to eat!

Chicks love a guy with a car who is buyin'!  Not a slimy wet avian who's ice-water swims they ain't tryin'!
Play it like me and then you'll hear some oh-myin'!  Stick to your sick shtick and you'll just leave 'em cryin'!
....unless it's them sassy elephant porpoise seals you're a-spyin', in which case you'll be joinin' in on the eye dryin'!

I ain't working to the beat because I'm hearted for cryin'. But what all yall humans have in common is that ain't none of us flyin'. I would pick a different junction if I tried to be tryin', but then I'm just a simple penguin you're flawed is what I'm implying!