Puzzle Time: Festive Edition- Dec 20-26, voting on the 27th

[DragonRose]

Yeah, I know I said that I was going to hold off until the new year- I didn't plan on being so BORED at my parent's house (I have no computer of my own here for two weeks... send help)

So, it's puzzle time time!

Rules: Every week a post will be made with a list of items and a scenario. Using your wit, skill and lack of mental health; find a way to complete the scenario with the items provided. You can only use a set number of items of your own choice. When I say use your skill, use it.

For example: you have a boulder and a reinforced window. I advise not using Pick Up boulder chuck through window. Think of something adventuresque to use.

Voting: After the week voting shall commence!

What If I win?: The winner chooses the next scenario and list of items.

Scenario:

Have you ever heard little kids ask how Santa is able to get down a chimney without getting stuck?  Well, the problem is, he doesn't ALWAYS make it.

Santa's stuck in your chimney.  Get him out before sunrise or Christmas is ruined!

I'm so incredibly bored I drew a picture.


Items:
Santa
Milk
Cookies
plate
table cloth
Christmas tree
Ornaments
Christmas star
Electric Christmas lights
A potted pointsetta
Christmas cards
4 stockings
Fireplace tools (shovel, poker and whisk)
Box of oversized fireplace matches
4 oranges (if I get an orange in my stocking, so will all of you!)
logs
3 Christmas presents containing whatever you want (also known as three inventory items of your choice)

Happy Puzzling to all, and to all a good night.

[BerserkerTails]

Okay, here goes.

TAKE present no. 1.
OPEN present no. 1.
TAKE RC car.
TAKE ripped present wrapping.
TAKE tape off ripped present wrapping.
TAKE christmas lights.
USE christmas lights on Santa.
USE christmas lights on RC car.
USE tape on RC car remote to jam the accelerator.
TURN ON RC car.

Santa's too fat to be pulled out!

TAKE pointsetta petal.
TAKE milk.
USE poinsetta petal on milk.
GIVE tainted milk to Santa.

Santa throws up, losing enough weight to be pulled out of the chimney by the tugging RC car!

Ta-da!

[straston]

TAKE Present No 1
Open Present No. 1 ("Oh a potato peeler")
TAKE POTATO PEELER
TAKE ORANGES
USE POTATO PEELER on ORANGES (you get ORANGE PEEL and ORANGE PULP)
USE ORANGE PULP with MILK (you get makeshift GREASE)
TAKE GREASE
TAKE TABLECLOTH
PUT TABLECLOTH on GROUND in front of the fireplace
TAKE POKER from fireplace
USE ORANGE PEEL with GREASE
USE greased ORANGE PEEL with POKER
USE POKER with SANTA (you put the orange peel between Santa and each of the four chimney walls)
Santa will glide down on the tablecloth with grease around his belly...

Bye, Straston

[Eggie]

TAKE MATCHES
"Aw, someone spilt milk on them"

USE MATCH ON LOG
"The match is too damp"

TAKE LOG
"Too heavy..."

EXAMINE LIGHTS
"I don't think I've seen a more overloaded socket since my dad got a turkey stuck in his eye..."
"Last year the plug socket was so overloaded that a it blew a fuse."
"The sparks almost statrted a fire, this year though, Dad's put in one less light."
"My Dad sure is good at outsmarting Mr. Electricity!"

OPEN PRESENT 1
"Oh wow! A free Ipod! What an awesomly original idea!!"

LOOK IPOD
"Hmmmn, batteries not included. But it says here it can run off mains power..."

PLUG IN IPOD
"I'm not about to risk blowing a fuse unless I know something productive will come out of it."

LOOK AT TABLE CLOTH
"There's a label..."
"Machine washable blablabla, flammable yaddayaddayadda, do not consume..."

TAKE TABLE CLOTH
*You whip it off without disturbing the plate of cookies*
"I used to be a magician!"

DROP TABLE CLOTH
"Okay, I've laid it out so that it reaches from the fireplace to the tree."
"The plan, it forms!"

PLUG IN IPOD
"It's still not enough. Just giving Santa a burn bottom won't get him out."
"I need something with more punch, something explosove..."

OPEN PRESENT 2
"A tin of Uncle Joes Extra-fizzy non-alcoholic bean punch??!"
"Wow, Aunt Betty. You shoudn't have..."

OPEN TIN
"Not with my bare hands"

OPEN TIN WITH POKER
"Still not enough"

OPEN TIN WITH SHOVEL
"Nope."

OPEN TIN WITH CHRISTMAS STAR
"What is with this can?!"

OPEN PRESENT 3
"Oh, look at that, a tin-opener..."

OPEN TIN WITH TIN OPENER
"Theeere we go. Wow...This stuff is volitile, that fizz almost took my head off"

DRINK TIN
"I have too much to lose..."

GIVE TIN TO SANTA
You: Hey, SC, is there room to squeeze a Tin of Uncle Joes up there?
Santa: There's always room for Uncle Joes!!
*You pass the tin up to him, he slurps it and immediately starts flatulating like there's no tommorow*

PLUG IN IPOD
"Here goes nothing..."
"More importantly, there goes this areas power grid..."
*You plug in the Ipod, it plays 'Santa Claus is coming to town for a few seconds before the lights explode in a shower of sparks. There is darkness for a monent, then the room is lit up by the carpet which has been set ablaze, the fire travels along the carpet until it reavhes the fireplace, immediately the fire reacts with the methane that Santa's producing, causing a massive explosion which fires Santa out of the chimney like a rocket. The room and everything in it is destroyed but Santa is free*
Santa: Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!
You: My dad is going to kill me...

STUFF TO CONSIDER:
* In a dialog with Santa, he should drop a hint about his wind problem.
* Pretty much everything examined in the room would be accompanyed by an anecdote about 'Dad'
* As an alternative to the carpet, you could lay wooden ornaments on the ground (A corn doll made by Dad's first true love, A wooden that that Grand-dad whittled on his death bed, and a piece of the true cross)
*Santa can be poked with all manner of objects

[Radiant]

You are in your living room. Your parents are still asleep. A plate of yesterday's cookies is on the table; they have gone slightly moldy. A christmas tree is in the corner, decorated with a string of lights and a pointy star. Most importantly, though, Santa is here - stuck in the chimney!
> Talk to Santa
A muffled cry for help is the only response.
> Pull Santa
You cannot move him. He's entirely stuck.
> Take poker
You take the poker that stands near the chimney.
> Take christmas lights
You turn off the christmas lights and carefully remove them from the tree.
> Take star
You cannot reach it, it's in the top of the tree.
> Climb tree
You climb to the top of the wobbly tree and take out the star. It is very sharp - no wonder they kept it out of your reach!
> Take cookies
Yech. But ok.
> Go to roof
On the roof, several reindeer are huddled together near the chimney, anxiously awaiting the return of their master. One of them has a bright red nose and is standing apart from the rest.
> Talk reindeer
One of the bigger reindeer lowers his antlers and lifts a foot menacingly. You quickly step back.
> Talk to Rudolph
Rudolph is too scared and shies back.
> Give cookies to Rudolph
The large reindeer looks at you angrily, as if demanding that he be given the cookies instead.
> Wave poker at reindeer
You wave the poker menacingly at the angry reindeer, and the creature slowly backs off.
> Give cookies to Rudolph
The poor reindeer looks starved! It appears the other reindeer never let him join in reindeer meals. He eagerly accepts your cookies.
> Talk to Rudolph
The reindeer gives a friendly neigh. Or whatever neigh-equivalent noise reindeer make.
> Tie lights to Rudolph
You tie the string of christmas lights around his neck.
> Put lights down chimney
You lower the other end of the string down the chimney, and tell Santa to hold on to it.
Rudolph gives the string a pull, but it doesn't work - Santa is still stuck down there.
> Go to kitchen
Ok. The kitchen is stocked with supplies for christmas dinner. About the only thing that isn't  part of that is a bottle of slightly overdate milk.
> Churn milk
Using the poker, you stir the milk for a very long time until it turns into butter.
> Go to roof
Ok
> Pour butter down chimney
You pour the slippery butter down the chimney. Hopefully this will help greasing Santa out of it! Rudolph makes a half-hearted attempt to pull again, but doesn't quite make it.
> Poke Rudoplh with star
You poke the reindeer with the pointy star. He squeals in surprise and bursts forward in full speed! There is a loud PLOP noise as Santa is forcefully expelled from your chimney!
You quickly clean up the roof a bit, then Santa returns with his full group of reindeer, most of which look rather apologetically to the shiny-nosed beauty in front. Santa gives you 3 Christmas presents containing whatever you want (also known as three inventory items of your choice) and hopes these will help you solving your favorite adventure game!

Fade out to medley of christmas songs!
MERRY CHRISTMAS

[Einoo]

I have decided to make my puzzle answer Radiant-style (i.e. like a text adventure).

>open present 1
It's rope... It says "100% MAGICAL ELVEN ROPE" on it... Yeah, right...

>open present 2
You take what appears to be a power saw from the box. Weird.

>open present 3
A wheelbarrow. How DID it fit in that box?

>talk to Santa
All Santa will say is "HELP ME!"

>take logs
They're too heavy.

>use wheelbarrow with fireplace logs
You are too weak and fragile to put logs in the wheelbarrow on your own. You should really have enrolled into that exercise program.

>use fireplace shovel with logs
Using the shovel, you easily grab some logs.

>use fireplace shovel with a log in it with wheelbarrow
You easily put the logs in the wheelbarrow.

>take cookies, milk, plate, tablecloth, and christmas lights
You have no idea why you should, but you dump these items into your wheelbarrow as well. The tablecloth is sticky with cookie frosting.

>throw plate
CRASH!
...
Why the #$*!%&# did you make me do that?!?!?

>go outside
You are outside. Whoop dee doo.

>go to roof
It's too high up.

>cut logs with power saw
You saw the logs into lots of wood.

>use sticky tablecloth on lots of wood
You use the frosting to stick the logs together and make a crude ladder.

>put crude ladder on roof
After much work, you lay down the crude ladder on the roof.

>climb crude ladder
What about the wheelbarrow?

>drop wheelbarrow
Done.

>take milk, cookies, and christmas lights out of wheelbarrow
You still have no idea why to carry these around, but take them anyway.

>climb crude ladder
Carefully, you climb the crude ladder. Luckily, you're thin enough not to unstick the frosting. You are now on the roof. There is a chimney here, Santa's hand is sticking out.

>tie "elven rope" to Santa
It's too short to reasch.

>tie Christmas lights to Santa
It's too short to reach.

>tie "elven rope" to Christmas lights
You make a long rope.

>tie long rope to Santa
This is, thankfully, long enough.

>pull long rope
Once again, you are not strong enough.

>look at cookies
100% Sugar Brand Cookies. Ingredients: Sugar, flour, water.

>eat cookies
You never eat cookies without milk. That spoils the deliciousness.

>dip cookies in milk
You dip the cookies into the milky goodness.

>drop milk
OK.

>eat milky cookies
You eat the cookies and get a sudden sugar rush.

>think
You're too hyper to think.

>pull long rope
You do so with your newfound energy. You manage to get Santa out, and he thanks you. He gets on his sleigh and shouts, "Merry christmas to all, and to all a good night!" You immediately make an early New Year's resolution to make your chimney bigger.

THE END!!!

[DragonRose]

Ladies and gentlemen! It's December 27th, the day after boxing day. Time for voting! Hooray! You have until exactly 24 hours after this post to get your votes in. Hurry hurry hurry!

Awesome puzzles one and all.

[Moox]

BerserkerTails, Simple yet effective.

[Radiant]

I vote for Eggie. I think the descriptions are very nice.

[Eggie]

I vote for radiant, but why couldn't any of the other reindeer have done Rudolphs job?

[Haddas]

Eggie

[Radiant]

Eggie -> well, you know that the other reindeer (dasher/dancer/blitzen/prancer/donner/vixen/comet/cupid)  always tease him and never let him join in any reindeer games (then again any reindeer named after a female fox or a cherub is likely to have issues). And Rudolph is the heroic one that goes down in history, just like Atilla the -er- never mind

[DragonRose]

Da dada daaaaa! Voting over.  And the winner is....

EGGIE!

Woo. Congratulations!