Fortnightly Writing Competition -BIBLICAL BOOK (Results)

[Baron]

And now Judgement Day is upon us!   The following seek entry through the pearly gates:

Sinitrena with The Book of the Lady's Awakening
Gurok with The Book of the Young Jesus Christ Chronicles
Mandle with The Book of Unfinished Business
Ponch with The Book of Moo

But they must pass within in the order of merit, with the undeserving cast off into a gruesome writer's purgatory combining perpetual dark and stormy nights and their second grade handwriting instructors!

Let our sinners be judged on the following criteria:

Best Character: the most believable/captivating/magnetic/unique character
Best Setting: the most vivid background world (often inferred through sparse and/or exaggerated descriptions)
Best Plot Despite Format: which story really shone through despite the awkward format?
Best Use of Biblical Verse: the technical art of combining words in an arcane and opaque manner.
Greatest Truth: Which story best reveals a lesson about humanity, the world, or the nature of the divine?

Judgement Day shall span three mortal days, for there is a lot of judgement to be done.  Judgement shall cease on the 4th of October, and thereafter all shall be cool for the rest of eternity.

[Mandle]

Yeah sorry, I couldn't find the time or motivation to keep going on my entry: It seemed like a cool idea at 2AM to rewrite the Book Of Genesis from the point of view from an AI in the future to whom Man had become a distant legend, but then, by the light of day, I realised it was actually pretty cliched...

I do still like the "pun" on "day" and "data" though: So I'll just let it stand on that "strength"...

[Baron]

But really, how many authors of books in the bible must have felt the same way the next morning? 

[Mandle]

But really, how many authors of books in the bible must have felt the same way the next morning? 

[Ponch]

Best Character: Gurok
Best Setting: Sinitrena
Best Plot Despite Format: Sinitrena
Best Use of Biblical Verse: "My mother is immaculate!" made me giggle out loud. Gurok
Greatest Truth: Sinitrena

Good work all 'round

[Gurok]

Best Character: Sinitrena (for the Lady)
Best Setting: Ponch
Best Plot Despite Format: Sinitrena
Best Use of Biblical Verse: Mandle
Greatest Truth: Mandle

[Sinitrena]

Best Character: Ponch - All hail the mighty cow. Moo.
Best Setting: Gurok
Best Plot Despite Format: Mandle - Not despite the format, because of the format. I would have loved to read more.
Best Use of Biblical Verse: Gurok - "My mother is immaculate!", indeed.
Greatest Truth: Mandle

[Mandle]

Best Character: Sinitrena (The Lady... And such a great answer to the stupid question "What would Jesus do?"... He would just look at modern religion and say "I would have carpented more bookcases...So that the ignorant not be led so far astray...")
Best Setting: Gurok (Jesus and his mates out on a lark: Brilliant!)
Best Plot Despite Format: Sinitrena (A deep plot, and rings deeply of the truth of what a deity would think about what we had done with their wisdom...)
Best Use of Biblical Verse: "Forgive me, farmer. For I know not what I do."... That was a friggin' gut-buster! So: Gurok!
Greatest Truth: Sinitrena

[Mandle]

Also as an afterthought...And to bump the thread so that Baron knows I actually voted:

Gurok: There could be a seriously awesome game made from your story...Any chance of this happening?

The amazing jokes are already there, the plot is fleshed out, and I think the puzzles write themselves...

Pleeeaaase??!!

[Baron]

And the end is nigh!  Or upon us, or whatever.

Winning the golden book of supremacy with 8 votes is Sinitrena!  Isn't it funny how religions go off the rails once the original deities put things on cruise-control?  I also liked the fragmented format, as if it were unearthed from some ancient holy library.

Earning the silver book of secondness with 6 votes is Gurok.  An excellent first outing, may you have many more (new game project with Mandle notwithstanding )

Receiving the bronze book of biblicizing was Mandle with his short history of computing.  Is it sad that I've learned more about that topic through a biblical writing competition than 30 years of actually using computers?

And then there's Ponch.  We've missed you, buddy, although it's hard to tell from the number of votes you garnered.  I, for one, was a fan.  I especially liked the whole Aaron did begat instructifying the peeps in his pimptastic manner verse.  Unfortunately we have no trophy for 4th place, but if you just keep at it I'm sure you'll claw hoof yourself back up into trophy contention sooner rather than later.

And with that yet another biblical epoch draws to yet another spectacularly overwrought apocalypse, with flaming toads raining down from the sky with such heat that they splat their searing juices all over you upon impact, melting away the fickle flesh of vanity and exposing your inner being for ultimate judgement.  Or, more plainly and frankly accurately, this is the end of a simple competition and things will just keep keeping on, so don't sweat it too much, k?  The next host, by virtue of victory is Sinitrena, to whom I turn over the mantle of contest administration for the coveted October contest.  I look forward to her ghoulishly ghastly topic in the next exciting instalment of...

The Fortnightly Writing Competition!1!!

[Ponch]

What? I have to make my own trophy out of construction paper and paper towel tubes? Again?!? Man, there's just no justice in the world.

Congrats to all the winners (all the other competitors but me)!

[KyriakosCH]

Just copy-paste one of Lord Dunsany's stories then

[Gurok]

Oh wow, thank you so much for the trophy, everyone.

Congrats to Sinitrena for getting first place!

Congrats to Mandle too! I don't think I'd have the time to do it, Mandle. It'd make for a good MAGS theme though.