A random song for critique.

[Calin Leafshade]

Not AGS related but I thought some people might like to hear my (less serious) music

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-PfXP5JdBc

[Scarab]

Lol, that line about the wobbly desk is so harsh

[Jimbob]

Haha, like you say on your blog, very Deep Blue Something and a delivery that if you didn't have the lyrics in the video you'd completely miss out on.

My main problem is that there's no real dynamic between the verse and chorus...which after four minutes gets a little bit too much, but some good lines in there, if some do sound a little forced when you're trying to fit all the syllables in

You've got a very Ben Gibbard style voice as well (only drowned in reverb ), which for me adds to the amusement... thinking it could make the next Death Cab album...

[None]

  I LOVE YOU... END OF STORY.

[Calin Leafshade]

So.. are we having sex now or later?

[Anian]

...good thing I only asked for a cookie. 

A bit onT: like Jimbob said, a bit of diversion between the chorus and the verses, and maybe talking less directly about some topics just to make it a bit more "deeper"...though I did like the song in general.