Updated! Pg 1 thru 3 webcomic prototype(Contains Graphic Violence kids!)

[Squinky]

Pg. 3:


I realize I may be perpetauting some issues here, but I plan on going back and having a once over before I get too far. Just felt more like doing another page before doing more fix up work....

I'm still working on the shading thing, and will  most likely go over these pages soon...

Darth
I like the whole interactive comic thing, but I have an affinity to classic comics. That and I suck at flash...heh....Maybe someday though. Hey and thanks for the compliments man!

Helm+Andail
I will definately keep all of these tips in mind. I just hope I'm not irratating you guys when I don't quite get what your saying at first....

[Helm]

It's more I think, that we're not irritating you by hitting you with too much stuff, in too little time. Like the third page, but I wouldn't say the facial expression of the main character on the last panel is completely appropriate. It's a difficult one, though.

[theyak]

Since I'm not of any  art calibur high enough to give tips, maybe something on facial expression.  I think the expression I'd like to see for the final statement is more of an: Eyes slightly narrowed, smirking expression (closed lips, moderate upturning of the mouth, more so on one side).  It would sort of say, "You don't wanna F_ with me, but I'd find it amusing if you did."

[2ma2]

Be very careful entering sound effects and/or simple animation. I've seen some experiments using the formula, and I'm not that impressed. Whenever you start using anything other than virtually a still frame, you fudge up time, thus NOT making the reader choose their own pace. I know you talk about structured and userbased progress, but I'm talking single to single frame comprehension here. The very core of sequensial communication lies in seclosed moments, brought out of time. Incorporating movement/sound/effects deludes readers oh so little, yet oh so much. I don't think you such experiment with multimedia just because it's a webcomic. A suggest you only make experiments with page layout and readability for screen usage, and leave comics as comics. Otherwise it is a toon.

[Helm]

what the deserter and betrayer of ags said.

[loominous]

Think a standard inked shadow would work quite well. It s strong for well lit areas (and most others really) but since your comic seems to take place in mostly shady enviroments, it should work.

Some pros:

I) Quick
II) Creates dramatic scenes
III) Provides a classic comic look
IV) Easy coloring (no second shade to pick)

-

On a sidenote, I noticed that your linework is very rounded. There are two potential problems with this:

I) When working in 2D it s often adviced to exhaggerate "blockiness" to enhance the illusion of 3D, since well rounded and soft shapes don t suggest surfaces as clearly, and thereby tend to give a flat look.

II) Soft/rounded shapes tend to give a more friendly/feminine impression, and since you seem to aim for a sort of dark style, this may work against it.

Just a matter of style though.

-

Edit: Another thing. When coloring, a simple way to get the elements to connect to eachother, is to tint it towards some color.

A common mistake is to color things in neutral colors, as if shot seperately in a studio with white lighting. In reality, light bounces off and on all objects mixing the colors of the surfaces with the others, which is why you ll never find pure colors anywhere (if you observe a poolplayer leaning over a well lit table, you ll notice that regardless of the color of his clothes, he s pretty much all green on the side facing the table, caused by the light bouncing off the green surface of the table).

So by simply tinting the painting, you ll make the colors appear uniform and get rid it of neutral colors, which will connect the objects to eachother.

[Squinky]

Heres an attempt at shading pg 3 (fixed his expression on last frame)


It's not that great, and it takes a while....

[Helm]

this is quite more interesting to look at, for me at least. Try to avoid 'blanket shading' though. I'm mainly looking at panel 3 here. There should be a discernible light source, that accentuates things not all-evenly. Some of them are awash in the resulting shadows, some are not. If you look at the jacket in panel three, you've chased the contours of it and shaded evenly. This would only happen with strong lightning right in his face, and then, not so much.

[Stitches]

I like it a lot so far, and this has been my only source for seeing the updates to the comic....which is odd...CONSIDERING(aheM)..i agree with Helm on the matter of the shading on the last panel on page 3 though.  Like i have said to you before....Identify that light source...before you color it decide where that lightbulb covered in nasty rusted metal grating is...the color is the lightbulb?  How much light does it give off?  Etc.  But we have also talked about how you plan on improving with comics, and time.  So i say do what is comfortable.  At least you are producing something, which many artists cannot claim(since most of 'us' are procrastinators)(okay, well, at least i am)
I likey alot.
keep on cranking 'em out bro.

[Squinky]

I'm thinking I will produce the last four or so pages in the non-shaded style. I still can't pick a shading style, and I want to keep moving, so I don't succomb to dropping the thing altogether.... (I do stuff like that, I look at pg 1 thru 3 and think I should just redraw it all, cause it looks sloppy, but then when I redrew it all I would just want to do it again till I dropped it)

I've been looking at anime shading and will try that style I think. Part of my problem was I didn't plan on shading when I drew and colored the thing and I will plan next time. I'm hoping to have chapter 1 done in about a week, and will post it here (since  I am an attention whore) and we'll all rock out with our cocks out....er?

[Squinky]

Quick update for any who were interested....I've done about 3 more pages and they are all on line on drunkduck.....Heres the link....
http://www.drunkduck.com/25_cent_life/?i=494852

I will now cease pimping this here and just put a linky in my sig....