'One of these days' or, a Snowball game

[Rui 'Trovatore' Pires]

I'm just curious about it. I've seen this game in a couple of other forums, but I don't recall seeing it here in the AGS boards... so I thought I'd start one, and see what happened. I'll quote the intro and "rules" from the thread where I first saw it, the Gabriel Knight forums, started there by "Klausse".

Everybody knows on their own experience how any situation can snowball from a slight annoyance into something that looks like all the world is in conspiracy against you. Sometimes it might be pretty funny, it just depends on how serious the problems are, how you take them and in what mood you wake up this particular morning that turned out into a morning of another Not-my-day

So I suggest we can try it as a game, when somebody posts some slightly annoying situation and others add to it.

Or we can do it in more optimistic way, starting from a little joy and getting it better and better 

Like (a pessimistic variant)

There were only two people in the line in the supermarket, but the cashier was so incredibly slow, I began to feel I was getting late for my work...

(PS by Puss - yes, it's one of those games where a story builds up )

[Squinky]

So, then I decided to trick the cashier into working faster....By pissing my pants of course! The cashier didn't quite notice this even though the others in line had, so I decided to yell "Oh my god, I've pissed my pants and its making my open genital sores sting horribly!"

[Nostradamus]

Unfortunately a police offer with his dog walked in the supermarket and the smell of urine in my pants with traces of the pot I smoked last night got the dog, who was a drug finder dog, went crazy and started furiously biting my balls

[Sam.]

The extreme amounts of alcohol i had been drinking the night before had worked its way into my urine, the dog, swallowing som of the soaked pants was alcohol poisoned. it died instantly.

[Eigen]

"Oh my god! They killed doggy", screamed the police officer and before I could do anything, my hands were cuffed. So I was taken to the police car. Half way to the station, the car suddenly died. It was a rough neighbourhood, so in a few mintues the car was surrounded by armed guys. They started banging on the windows and yelled something in Japanese. I knew I was in trouble, as I hard one name shouted throughout the crowd - Ping Pong Yang.

[Babar]

Suddenly a man flew through the air and landed feet first on the car. He had two Paddles-with-pingpong balls-attached (no idea what it is called). With some deft martial arts moves, he dispersed the crowd. He got me out of the car and started running with me. Suddenly a shot rang out. An officer had got him. He thrust a black bag in my hands. "Take this to the 7th Mobihfje". With that he fell. I started running. Suddenly I was confronted with a huge apparition....
On a side note, any competetion which involves a dog dying from chewing alcohol soaked balls has to be good.

*EDIT* These contests have a way of <snort> snowballing,Ã,  , so instead of posting an even more warped continuation, I will try to make it (slightly) more realistic. Here is another version:
The crowd parted and a scrawny fellow got me out of the car. He eyed the driver in a way that could have no misunderstanding. The police car drove away. "The Man wants to see you. He wants information on your leathal dog killing weapon. The Man don't like dead dogs." With this, you are taken into an old building, and down an elevator.

Choose wisely...

[Rui 'Trovatore' Pires]

Snowballing is fine. Besides, it's so fun when some people try and make desperate sense of the whole thing and other people just go wacko! So I'll take your first version.

Suddenly I was confronted with a huge apparition, the last man I expected to see at this time. Sloat Parker. My <gulp> boss.

"And WHY aren't you at work?" he bellowed at me with his powerful voice.

To which I whimpered, "The cashier was too slow, and then I pissed myself, and killed this dog, and..."

"BAH! Excuses, excuses, excuses! Get your lazy bum to the office right now!"

"Yes sir".

"But clean yourself first." said he, and stepped aside to reveal something long, rubberish  and tubular being held by my co-partners.

"Oh no" was all I could say before the high-tension jet of cold water struck me squarely in the chest. After a few agonizing seconds, I was shivering, wet... and somewhat clean, at that. I then followed my boss back to work, never noticing that in the confusion the bag had opened itself. In later years, I'd say to myself THAT was when the turd truly hit the fan - that single moment when, as I stepped away, the pebbles in the bag rolled out and started glowing with their own hidden light. Not that I saw it then, of course, but I've seen them at work since then - the Mobihfje. It would have been just their style.

[Squinky]

Turns out they were highly advanced devices designed to deploy from the pebble casing when introduced to the excact mixture of water and urine that I had exposed them too. Who would have known....We all watched in awe as the pebbles multiplied in a cheesy "crappy Gremlins movie" manner and then stick together, slowly forming something, and filling the air with the putrid stench of grandmother sex....

[Blade]

The worst was yet to come as the pebbles formed axactly a grandmother having sex with something undescribable. This was madness. I watched in horror as granny ponted her cold, wet finger straight at me and then I heard this cracking voice: Come to me, baby. And I pissed in my pants again...

[Einoo]

My boss immediately went to the doctor because he thought he was insane, and I ran out of the building. I ran so far that my legs wore out. Finally, I was in an alley that smelled of horseradish. I was suddenly at a dead end. Then... a "pack" of possums slowly ganged up on me...

PS: How exactly do we decide when one story ends and another starts?

[Rui 'Trovatore' Pires]

It should be all one story, really. If someone wants to cut it in the middle, there's always that gool ol' trick: "That's when I realized it had all been a dream." But beware, use it too often and I'll find a way to tie them ALL back together from the 1st post!

...I thought this was it, this was where I checked out for real, and THIS wouldn't be a slow cashier, oh no, this would be quick to serve me the bill. My fighting skills are, needless to say, non-existant - like a natural catastrophe, it's only in times like these you realize how ill-equipped you REALLY are to deal with the world. I shut my eyes and prayed it would all be over soon.

It was only when I noticed that I'd had time to go around the whole rosary business twice that I realized I was still alive, so I opened my eyes.

The first thing that struck me was the pair of eyes that I saw - they seemed to be disconnected from anything else. Then they blinked, and gave me time to check the surroundings - they WERE, in fact, connected to the skull of an individual whose rest of the head was surrounded by a black cloth. In the darkness, this made only his eyes visible.

"Ah, you're awake," said he. "Finally. Come, we have much to do."

Without waiting for a reply, he stepped over what I realized were the bodies of the possum. I followed my impromptu ninja-like savior and noticed another thing - the bag wasn't in the ground anymore. Neither were the pebbles. ANd neither, thankfully, was the granny. I inquired my rescuer about it and he answeres with a quick shake of the head. Presumably, it meant "not now". Hopefully, it also meant "Soon, but not now."

"Ok, what CAN you tell me right now?" I asked.

"Nothing you'd really want to know."

"Try me."

"Others will try you soon enough, believe me. You don't need me to be the extra burden. Here's what I CAN tell you - that bag was handed to you because it was for you."

"What? No, I was supposed to deliver it to someone."

"I know. I am that someone. But the bag opened, and the pebbles reacted. That meant it was not for me - it was for you. I'm sorry you have arrived so late in this, but I have little time for further explanation. We have to find that granny."

I blinked. "What?"

"We have to find that granny."

I blinked twice. "What, find THAT?"

"You're a bit slow on the uptake, I see. Ah well, ninjas can't be choosers. Was some horseraddish?"

"Yech. No thanks."

"Yeah. Filthy habit. I'm trying to quit, myself."

And of we went - the 7th Mobihfje who had a craving for horseraddish, and me, whose defence seemed to mostly consists of an uncanny ability to let my bladder go in the face of danger, off to find some spectral granny before that granny found someone else. Or someTHING else.

It turned out we found her in a farm with too many goats around.