Maniac Mansion Beta Game Intro

[Dr Fred Rubacant Edison]

Its Kinda Long and sorry if you cant read the text to well.

This is a Maniac Mansion Fan Game.
Maniac Mansion The New Saga game takes place in a alternate reality / alternate universe where some things are the same and some things have MAJOR DIFFERENCES.


http://www.youtube.com/v/vQZaNrgFxSg.com

[DoorKnobHandle]

You're ripping the graphics off the Maniac Mansion Series, not mentioning this here and then, in the video, you even credit yourself for characters and backgrounds...

[Dr Fred Rubacant Edison]

For New characters and backgrounds Only that i made or edited. What are you talking about. I use the same Graphics as Maniac mansion Mania. Why cant i use them to.

[Dr Fred Rubacant Edison]

You're ripping the graphics off the Maniac Mansion Series, not mentioning this here and then, in the video, you even credit yourself for characters and backgrounds...

DID YOU WATCH THE WHOLE MOVIE. I dont think you did


What Graphics did i rip, Hmm just Dave, Sandy, Bernand,   The other guy i made.  The back grounds i got from Maniac mansion Mania and i edited some of them.

[ThreeOhFour]

The story you have created seems interesting, and I am sure will allow for interesting scenarios in the game. I feel the introduction could be altered, however.

What follows will be my opinion. I am not saying you are wrong, I am saying that I feel personally that improvements could be made to this introduction.

This introduction is too long. Far too long. There isn't much going on, really, story wise, and if I sat down to play a game and 5 minutes through this thing was still playing, I'd skip the introduction (or quit if I couldn't do so). I'd suggest you either cut a whole bunch of stuff out or you allow the player to play parts of these cutscenes. For example, you could get them to make Bernard look at the lockers and then talk to Ned. This isn't much, but helps them feel involved.

I also noticed a few grammatical and spelling errors, so make sure you get someone to proofread your game before you release it.

Well done for putting together the introduction, and good luck with your game.

[DoorKnobHandle]

Okay, on re-watching the credits-part of the trailer, you do give credit to the authors. Since that part is very long, I skipped there and just saw the "new backgrounds/characters: Rubacant". Don't want to play moderator, but please be a little bit more relaxed the next time somebody overlooks a detail, no need to be that defensive (to the others: I also received abuse via PM). And to answer the question in your message directly, FoY and my Pong clone don't rip off graphics. It's fan-art. That's not taking sprites from FoA for example.

Your scripting seems fine, but I can only emphasize what the previous poster said about the writing.

[Dr Fred Rubacant Edison]

Thanks for the posts. This Intro is only Beta. The credits at the end  is very long. In the game you can skip the intro.
Im going to take out the credits from the intro and have a show credits hot spot on the screen to save some time.
I going to fix all of the grammatical and spelling errors in the final version. One step at a time. Plus im still working on Beta Backgrounds and only have a few final backgrounds for the first floor.

[Shane 'ProgZmax' Stevens]

dkh:  Try not to jump to conclusions.  It often just creates trouble and misunderstandings.

Rubacant: Relax and don't double post.  Also, congratulations on coming closer to finishing your game.  The intro seems really promising, and I don't mind long intros as long as there's some gameplay here and there or they can be skipped in parts.  One thing I should point out is that since your game seems to predate Maniac Mansion, Dave, etc were high school kids in the original as far as I know so they would still be high school kids in the prequel.  You'll probably want to correct that in spite of any other changes.  Also, the dialog needs some streamlining/fixing, but aside from that you've got me interested!

[Dr Fred Rubacant Edison]

Where did you get high school from. 





http://www.youtube.com/v/kzKbrUYROIw


http://www.youtube.com/v/DNsrYOVIiN4

[Dr Fred Rubacant Edison]

 They were in College. Where did you Get high school from? Maniac Mansion Mania.
It say College in the old C64 Version and i dont think its wrong. I will get a pic. later

All so my game is not a prequel at all. Its in the same time path but differnt. The game takes place in a alternate reality / alternate universe where some things are the same and some things have MAJOR DIFFERENCES.

Like the Edison's family is bigger. Nerdy Ned one of Dr Fred's younger son age 22 go's to college with Bernard and they dont get along. Nerdy Ned wants to be like his Dad. Allso Bernard stays at home with his mom and dad house still. But Dave and Sandy live on there own and live at the  same house. Dave Plays Foot ball for College and taking  classes to learn Construction.

I didnt want to show to much or any of the story in the intro. This will make you keep gessing whats going to happen nexted and allso it will make you use your imagination more.

Should i Post the intro has a AGS game download so you can see the text better. 

[Ghost]

Posting only the intro would be okay, you might attract some more viewers, but even better would be a small part of the game, also allowing us to see some interaction.

I quite like the different timeline approach, and seeing the kids and some new Edisons being at college together- it was often suggested that the Edison clan's quite big, so it even makes sense.

I know you've been working on this for ages, and it's nice to see you reaching the playable state, so good luck 

One step at a time.

Wise approach!

[Mister L]

We from www.maniac-mansion-mania.com used "highschool" instead of "college", cause when you're in college you usually don't live at home with your parents any more. 

Most of the kids in MMM do live with their parents, so it's "highschool" for MMM!

[rock_chick]

We from www.maniac-mansion-mania.com used "highschool" instead of "college", cause when you're in college you usually don't live at home with your parents any more. 

Most of the kids in MMM do live with their parents, so it's "highschool" for MMM!

Yeah in the USA that's usually the case and they usually live dorms but over here in Australia there's a trend towards people living at home until they're 25(and I'm not talking about the ones that have moved out before and then move back in for certain reasons), I mean the ones that are happy to just mooch of their folks and not want to move out and do a bit of that grown up stuff.

[Fee]

According to most US shows, every college has a Dorm or a bunch of Fraternity houses and everyone lives in them.

Nice intro

[Dualnames]

Rubacawa or whatever you're called.. if you don;t appreciate critique then do what most people who don;t appreciate critique do.. They don;t post here.

[Scummbuddy]

You could probably make a better storyline if you instead of having Bernard need to go home before he goes to get Dave's help, have Dave be the one that can't get anyone to respond to him. That way they both have motivation and interest in the story.

I mean, its a little silly for the genius to need a jock to figure out whats going on. Its usually the other way around.

-------

And if someone (Bernard or Dave) is in a room asking if anyone is home, you may want the character to pace around the room a bit as they are talking.

Another thing to check is how to add time between dialog lines. They are all one after another and it doesn't always work that way.

-------

You can drop the lines of "I tried to call my parents house first...""They didn't answer"        Its needless and slows down the progression.

--------------

Instead of "What the!"    try "What the..." Use the elippses when sentences don't really end.

And Hay! is actually "Hey!"

----------------
Even though the text changed color it was hard to understand who Bernard was talking to. Bring the conversation into the house. We need to see Dave and his blue text before we just see blue text to associate them together.

--------------
I'd fix the sign in Daves room that reads "Dave and Sandy" because I read it "Dave Sandy and".... You know what, instead have the door originally closed and have a sign read "Dave and Sandy's room, or something. That way we still know that they are a couple, but that old sign seems a little odd for them to have.

[Hudders]

I think you should trim it down.

Far too dialogue-heavy.