Is there any way in the world I can improve this?

DanSte · Wed 26/08/2009 11:44:47

Hihi.

It has been a fairly long time since I posted here, unfortunately, but maybe you will remember that old topic I made on the character I was doing. (He has since disappeared off the face of the planet. Way to add a story, huh?) But before I got my first tablet, which is a Capax 12" x 9" with nifty 29 assignable macro-keys, I decided to do something in paint.net the good old fashioned (I hope) way. Using a mouse!

I've shown it to a few people and they all think it's good the way it is, so I guess the main point of the post that I am trying to get across is: "Is there any way in the world I can improve this?" Oh wait, I named the thread that...

Anyway here it is in all its cartoony goodness, and yes I did use one building as a reference. (From one of those tiller technique things)

Okay, thanks and have fun critiquing!

Misj' · Wed 26/08/2009 13:42:17

Hay Dan,

Fist off I must stay that the resemblance to the image by Erwin was indeed quite obvious (maybe a bit too much for the building), and many of the advises by Bill Tiller apply to this background as well. Particularly the head-on of the building. It should be relatively easy to make it more dynamic by shifting the camera slightly.

Composition-wise the piece could do with a little focus, framing, etc. to guide the viewer to the areas of interest; because that's not really the case as it is. For starters I would advice you to go through any thread where Ben goes all paintery (here and here), because they are filled with little tid-bits on composition, colour, etc.

Misj'

Ps. Great dynamic clouds by the way!

Shane 'ProgZmax' Stevens · Wed 26/08/2009 22:10:12

For some reason the imageshack link wasn't showing up for me until I modified your message and pasted it manually, but at least I can see it now!

Anyway, I like the flow of the background, which seems pretty heavily borrowed from Day of the Tentacle's art direction. I like the clouds overall, but the large white one almost looks like a massive bird in front of the sun like that, and the rocks seem a bit dark and poorly defined for such a bright environment. The towers on the close building mirror each other, which would be fine if they were at the center of the image, but since they are off to the side you should adjust their perspective to match. Aside from that, I like it!

DanSte · Wed 26/08/2009 22:28:47

Yes I know that it's quite obviously based on that particular image.

Anyway, I will go back and change the perspective on the right tower so it looks better. That's of course after I get home from school.

Thanks, it's amazing to be honest, I wouldn't have thought of any of these suggestions. Oh yeah, I've started using my new tablet so I might do the edits with it so I can define the features more easily because the mouse is just too clunky for me. 8)

Jared · Thu 27/08/2009 04:06:34

I usually don't crit at all, but I was struck by the lighting on the right-hand tower. It looks distinctly odd. The shadows along the front to me only look like they would make sense if the building was on an angle, which isn't suggested by anything else in the picture. And the left-hand edge of that tower looks like it's in direct sunlight, when it's actually facing the complete opposite way. The consistency of the lighting on everything else also makes this really stand out when you look for it.

Matti · Thu 27/08/2009 04:37:23

Yes, I agree with Jared and was about to say the same. The lighting on the right tower indeed doesn't make much sense.

DanSte · Thu 27/08/2009 09:39:26

The parts about the lighting are done on purpose, this isn't a background for a game but more as a picture that provokes questions. However I do understand what you mean, but I don't want to change that because it just wouldn't fit this style. It's more of an experimental kind of thing not meaning to conform to the principles and rules we're used to, if that makes sense.

Thanks for the suggestions on the lighting though, assuming it ever becomes art for a game I will mend the broken rule.

ZaphodB · Fri 28/08/2009 13:13:31

It doesn't look experimental and thought provoking, it just looks like you drew the tower with incorrect lighting.
You need to be able to do things the correct way before you can do them the incorrect way well.

The three rocks are quite obvious copy/paste fodder and the lighting on the tree looks off, surely at the bottom of the branches there would be a little shadow?

Having said all that I do like the sky and the shadowing.