Let's rewrite the english language

[Raggit]

I didn't really know if this should be in the competitions forum or here or wherever.  

Ladies and Gentlemen!!  Raggit the retard announces one of the dumbest competitions yet!  The "Let's rewrite the english language" contest!    Yes, it's stoopid and pointless, but so are we!  




There are so many words that are spelt differently than they are pronounced.  Like "island".

Think of as many words as you can to change and add them to the list.  There are really no winners, so just have fun.  

Original:  Island
New:  Iland

Original: Portion
New:  Poorshun

Original: Shoe
New:  Shoo

Original: Adventure Game Studio
New:  Advensure  Gayme Stoodeo

[Timosity]

It shood bee, lets reryt tha Inglish langwidg

[Trapezoid]

Or we could switch to Esperanto.

[evenwolf]

This maiks noe sents. Wie, wie wie?

[Raggit]

This maiks noe sents. Wie, wie wie?

Now yor getteng it!!!!!

[Nellie]

Original: Shoe
New: Shoo

But now how will I distinguish that thing on my foot from that sound I make to get rid of small children?

[Trapezoid]

Since when is saying "shoo" is a contraceptive?

[Nine Toes]

Ghoti <--- look, I spelled "fish"!

"GH" as in couGH, "O" as in wOmen, and "TI" as in staTIon.

Nellie, here's what you can do... instead of saying "shoo", just say "beet it", "piss off", or "git lost".   Or, "Yoo dertee littl helyuns, go bother yer muther er sumthin!"

I think rewriting the english language would involve getting rid of a few letters in the alphabet.  Like "C" and "K" make the same sound, only difference is "C" also sometimes makes an "S" sound.  Or some letters could be replaced with a combination of letters, "X" would be "EKS".

This almost seems like it would be a new form of 1337.

[Evil]

... Mandable clicks...

[Alexis Vale]

Ghoti <--- look, I spelled "fish"!

"GH" as in couGH, "O" as in wOmen, and "TI" as in staTIon.

Nellie, here's what you can do... instead of saying "shoo", just say "beet it", "piss off", or "git lost".   Or, "Yoo dertee littl helyuns, go bother yer muther er sumthin!"

http://www.ualr.edu/~owl/howtospell.htm

Also, which President (or some famous person) was it that tried to change the spelling of words? A reporter didn't like the idea and wrote an entire misspelled collumn on the topic.

I thought I would bring up Newspeak, which I love entirely. It comes in handy in situations where one cannot think of the right word to use.
http://www.newspeakdictionary.com/ns_frames.html

[TheYak]

Andrew Carnegie, for some time, was the leader/president of the Simplified Spelling board.  There was a President who began backing it but I can't remember which one.  I do, however, remember what Mark Twain said about Simplified Spelling: "Simplified spelling brought about sun-spots, the San Francisco earthquake, and the recent business depression, which we would never have had if spelling had been left all alone."

[Las Naranjas]

Werriam Webster, the almighty guardian of American English insisted in all his early dictionaries that through was spelt thru, and many similar spellings. However, at other times he insisted that another illogical spelling stay.

Benjamin Franklin was also an adovocate of simplified spelling, "lest Englsih become no more than a pictorial asiatic language"

[Robert Eric]

Eye fele eye hav a good grasp on the inglish langooage.  Wy complikate it?

[EldKatt]

Ai þink ðat if eni spelling refóm šud bi implementid intú ðe Ingliš langwidž, it šud bi a mór fonetikali akyuret sistem, insted ov a sistem ðat is mérli diferent from ðe wan karentli in yúz, bat ikwali komplikeitid.

Ðe 'komplexiti' ov ðe karent sistem, ólso, has bin haili exagereitid, as it has bin próvd ðat iven wið a ráðer simpel set ov rúlz, a kompyuter kan ízili predikt ðe pranansieyšen ov eni given Ingliš wéd.

Eni refóm ov ðe kaind šown priviusli in ðis þred wud bi ráþer anneseseri, as it wud not ríli solv ani ov ðe problemz ðat mait posibli exist--ownli a sistem ov a mór fonetikal neitšer wud in ani wey posibli bi worþ ðe trabel a spelling refóm míns, end íven ðat is kwait anneseseri, given ðe fakt ðat ðe karent sistem wéks fain.

Bai ðe wei, þówz interestid in traying awt a refóm ov ðis neitÅ¡er will probabli--at líst if maximum akurasi is wontid--rekwayer a simbol representing a schwa (a mid-sentrel vawel). Ðe standard IPA simbol--an apsaid-dawn e wud wék, bat ðe limitid karakter set alawd on ðis fórum prevents mi from yuzing it. Ã"lso, a simbol to represent [&#331;] wud bi helpful, ðow not neseseri.

[Nacho]

De fany zinc sud bi dat non inglish spikers urait foneticly jau inglish is wraitid in deir oun linguich.

"The funny thing should be that non English speakers write foneticaly how English is writed in their own lenguaje"

Dis jas bin me wraitinc jast jau inglish saunds for spaniards.

"This has been me writing just how English sounds for Spaniards"

[Paper Carnival]

Gouae sioult goue nto dat? Ae meen, Engkles es jast faen as et es

[c.leksutin]

Keep it at-least somewhat readable, of the Gestapo will be 'round to bust up this rally like a highschool kegger!


C.

[Raggit]

Keep it at-least somewhat readable, of the Gestapo will be 'round to bust up this rally like a highschool kegger!


C.

Yes, he's right, let's keep this readable and in English, not spanish or whatever, as most people here speak English.

And you might wanna provide a translation along with it:

Yes, hees rite, lets keep dis reedable and n inglish, not spanish or watever, as most pepel here speek inglish.

[Babar]

aai haav a feeling dat it iz inglish and not spanish dat dey ar speekayng in. Aai just caant go thru da trubel of triang too translayt it. It iz surprizingli haard to mayk dis spelt diffrent from haow it soundz.

[rodekill]

poobungies to this.