Thanks, Nicky, for taking the time to rate and Trapezoid for having a look. Unbeknownst to all of you, I am indeed taking notes of all these comments. One thing I'm taking home from this is the fact that an elaborate world is hard to communicate. Ponderabilia evolved, and things got more complex and diverse. I was able to communicate some of what was obvious to me, and other parts fell into places where they weren't obvious from the start.
The entire scenario of Ponderabilia is about a hundred pages long, with all characters having a background and the surroundings being there for a reason. Hardly anything in Ponderabilia is random. When people were getting confused the first time around, I added tons of extra explanations, and Vergil (the fish) is there to provide extra background on a lot of things. I realise this isn't enough.
Nicky, the hotspot indicator is a great idea, and the only reason I didn't yet implement it is lack of time (I'm running a business, building a house and raising a newborn at the same time, so it gets rather busy.). If you happen to have any great ideas to make things smoother, I'm all ears.
Trapezoid, the character motivation is a valid issue. I think it's necessary to have a look at what Nikee really is. She's the last active remnant of comatose brain, and a complete antagonist to Steve. As such, she's impulsive, easy-going and random. She cannot be aware of her surroundings, as she's never been actively remembered. Every location has to be new to her. I'm thinking of her as a sort of Charlie the Unicorn, where the lead is pushed along against his own will, ending up in places he never had any intention of getting to.
That said, I'm a horrible character writer. IMHO, this is often done by women to far greater success than I can ever hope to achieve. If any female writers among you wish to round the characters, please let me know. You may have some pages of script and notes to plough through first, though.
The entire scenario of Ponderabilia is about a hundred pages long, with all characters having a background and the surroundings being there for a reason. Hardly anything in Ponderabilia is random. When people were getting confused the first time around, I added tons of extra explanations, and Vergil (the fish) is there to provide extra background on a lot of things. I realise this isn't enough.
Nicky, the hotspot indicator is a great idea, and the only reason I didn't yet implement it is lack of time (I'm running a business, building a house and raising a newborn at the same time, so it gets rather busy.). If you happen to have any great ideas to make things smoother, I'm all ears.
Trapezoid, the character motivation is a valid issue. I think it's necessary to have a look at what Nikee really is. She's the last active remnant of comatose brain, and a complete antagonist to Steve. As such, she's impulsive, easy-going and random. She cannot be aware of her surroundings, as she's never been actively remembered. Every location has to be new to her. I'm thinking of her as a sort of Charlie the Unicorn, where the lead is pushed along against his own will, ending up in places he never had any intention of getting to.
That said, I'm a horrible character writer. IMHO, this is often done by women to far greater success than I can ever hope to achieve. If any female writers among you wish to round the characters, please let me know. You may have some pages of script and notes to plough through first, though.